fic: Be My Player Two (Chapter 3/4)

[bonnefois]

Title: Be My Player Two (chapter 3/4)
Series: TF2
Character/Pairing: Scout/Miss Pauling, some mentions of ensemble, mentions of past Administrator/Saxton Hale
Rating: NC-17 (Finally earns its rating, heh)
Summary: AU. Sophie Pauling, assistant to one of the biggest (and evilest) media moguls in the world is commanded to scope out the new field of Let's Play celebrities. A gamer named Scout69 makes millions by screaming at video games. As she investigates the man behind the channel, she finds herself surprised, and charmed by him and his world beyond anything she's ever known in her workaholic, out of touch with trends life.
Word count: 20,647
Author's note: This whole thing came about from this exchange I had concerning Introducing The Steam Link.

Scout's LPer intro theme samples this song (Mild NSFW in picture, tons of bikinis haha)

The Fortune Cookie was a restaurant created to make "American Chinese" food in Shanghai. However, it closed in 2016.

Longfic_bingo: Crossover: any. The crossover in question is Youtuber LPers, though other than the mention of other people shipping Youtubers and faint mentions of Youtubers that have SOs, that part is gen.

For Madie.




Despite everything that had happened, the deal was going well. She'd received a contract from his lawyer, and it had taken surprising little time to satisfy both parties. All she had to do was hear from the Administrator on where to go from here. There were whispers of a show in the works, though nothing concrete so far.

The Administrator had maintained some interest in testing the waters about the digital streaming properties. From Hulu to Amazon Prime, one was bound to meet her criteria eventually. And he had just the kind of popularity backing to ensure whatever they started would have an instant fanbase of millions.

She closed her briefcase. Her usual glow of satisfaction from a deal was multiplied tenfold. She'd never had a client like this before. Infuriating, and inspiring all in one. Just as she had started to gather her things for the night, the phone rang.

"Miss Pauling. A new case came up. The meeting will be in two days. Pack your things immediately."

"Shanghai? But, I'm doing the Dempsey case right now," she said.

"It's been reassigned."

Sophie nearly dropped her phone. "What?"

"Do you not understand basic English, Miss Pauling? You're needed elsewhere, so the case has been given to Miss Jones."

Her jaw tensed. It took everything inch of self control she had had to not let out a stream of vile profanities. She'd worked herself to the bone for this case. It was supposed to be her breakout. The case which etched her name down in history. She'd be working with a new media, a whole new kind of celebrity. It would be the change which made all this worth it.

And in a flick of ash to the tray, all her plans were destroyed.

"Miss Pauling, are you there?"

"I'm here," Sophie said flatly. "I'll buy the tickets right away."

"Good."

She didn't say goodbye. Basic conversation took too much time and effort for her. When the call ended, Sophie stared down at the phone for a long time. Her hands tightened. In her mind, she could see herself flinging the phone at the wall. The glass shattering, catching flecks of the sunset for a moment before it scattered across the floor.

But she just put it in her purse and went home. It would be a long night ahead of her.

*

The tickets were all bought, and her things packed. For someone who seeming made bank, it came to mind that she certainly didn't have much to show for it. She'd never gotten around to upgrading to some pricey apartment. She hadn't bought many new suits, and she chose an efficient, gas-saving hybrid over a Porsche.

Bottles were all she had to show for years of work. Bottles which were discreetly recycled, until there was a new rule against recycling glass. Now they were bagged away in the back, a constant reminder of how her nights went, how she coped with stress, and how many drinks it took to unwind enough to fall asleep.

"Think on the bright side, it could be heroin," she said, as she poured out more alcohol. The morning flight would be horrible on a hangover, but whatever kept her homicidal urges down. These days, it was taking more and more alcohol to keep them in check.

She'd have to tell him eventually. But the thought of his face crumpling, like a kicked puppy made her pause.

A professional break up, like any break up, it was something best not done via text message.

She swiped left, and went to a familiar site. She might as well have made it her home page, considering it was the closest she felt to home these days. It was the one happy place that didn't leave a hangover and push her closer and closer to liver disease.

Sophie kept telling herself that technically this counted as research. Late night trips through his exercise channel, and sorting them into her very own private youtube playlist for personal enrichment. Maybe one day she'd actually even do these stretches, instead of just enjoying his tight shorts.

Pole dancing with Markiplier, Scout69, and Danny Sexbang.

The stripper, a blond woman named Brandi who wore a lavender low-cut blouse about two sizes too small started out with lessons. She popped her gum and smiled at Liam just a little longer than was really necessary.

Liam pulled himself up, and clung to the pole with his thick, muscled thighs. He spun around, and hung upside-down, with his shirt in his mouth to reveal more skin. Sophie outright gaped as she watched him pull himself up and work that pole like a damn professional.

"Whoa, sweetcheeks, I didn't think you had it in you. You been workin' the pole or somethin'?"

"Nah, though I might, this is fun. I watch tons of strippers, though. They're like superheroes, the shit they do on the pole is some kind of art."

"Some kind of art? You're sweet."

Brandi broke into laughter. Liam winked at the camera.

Markiplier put up a good fight, while Danny Sexbang could only comically cling to the pole. Then again, from what she could tell, he did everything comically.

She turned it back several minutes, for science's sake, and then slowed it down, like she was memorizing for a quiz, and the subject was Liam's ass. And Sophie always aced her tests.

Another to add to the private Liam Fucking Dempsey playlist. To be fair, she started it when she was really drunk and had a very lonely night ahead of her. Never mind that this basically summed up all her nights.

The autoplay turned to another video. She had been refilling her wine, so it wasn't until it started that she caught sight of just what video it had shifted to.

"Today I'm here with Brandi straight from the best chicken joint, Inquisitor Chicken! And I ain't just sayin' that because they got the hottest ladies and coolest bros around, their chicken really is that great!"

"Brandi with an I," she added.

"Brandi with an I?" Sophie steadied her grip on the wine glass and took a big gulp. Sticky liquid spilled from her lips, down her shirt. She had a feeling this was going to be a whole bottle video. Luckily, Sophie was always stocked up when it came to alcohol.

Logic dictated that she should push the back button, but she watched on.

"What does this button do?" Brandi said.

She pushed it and the car exploded. Liam burst out laughing.

"Oh! Psyche, that was the self-destruct button!"

Brandi-with-an-I laughed as well. "I don't know anythin' about these silly things."

She had a high, nasal sort of laughter. Whenever she laughed, her too-tight purple halter top seemed that much closer to exploding. She touched Liam's shoulder in a way that spoke of intimacy. They'd spent almost the entirety of the thirteen minute videos flirting. Sophie gritted her teeth each and every time Brandi-with-an-I leaned in, she giggled, and especially when she put her hands on him.

There might as well have been a neon flashing yeah, we fucked sign floating over their heads.

Before she'd had a chance to click away, the video auto-loaded to another one. She almost spilled her wine across her lap as she heard her own voice from the speakers.

She'd never watched the edited version of their time together. It turned out, he hadn't done much cutting. She couldn't tell if he was biased, and couldn't bring himself to cut anything, or if it really had turned out as well as he claimed.

She scrolled down to the comments. The top rated comment was three illogical words: "I ship it." Just as before in the comments, they were talking about nautical things again. In fact, many comments about these "ships" things had a note saying Scout69 liked this in blue right next to them.

All she could do was stare quizzically at the screen.

"What does ships have to do with this? Is this one of those little slang things I don't get? Like being on fleek? And fam? And how things are lit? I've still barely figured out what swag means, and it isn't even 'in' anymore! Is Swole like swag, but bigger?"

She'd once tried urbandictionary, but after accidentally stumbling into examples of depraved sex acts involving bodily fluids she had never associated as anything that could be used as sexual, she had never gone back. She settled to being out of touch of modern trends if it meant she never had to hear the words "Dirty Sanchez" again. When she was boss, she'd pay someone to be hip for her.

One entire bottle of wine later, the idea to pick up her phone came. Drunk Sophie usually passed out in a snuggie at home, but now that Liam was in her life, Drunk Sophie sometimes watched Youtube videos late into the night.

And sometimes, maybe strippers with names that end with I caused her thumb to slip onto the D part of her contacts.

"Yo--Sophie?"

"Soo Braandi, excuse me Brandi-With-An-I," Sophie said. Her words started to slur, but that hardly stopped her. "I hear she likes fried chicken."

"...Yeah, she digs it. That's where we met," Liam said.

Her stomach twisted at the thought. Right in the middle of a fried chicken place. They'd play video games together, and then he'd start making lists about her.

"I was watchiiing them and she plays eeeven worse than me. And I don't know what boats have to do with anything at all, but at least no one boats her. I read all the comments and nobody boated her at all. Not a single one, though I always get people who boat me and you, whatever that is. Though I guess the word is ship, though I don't know if there's even a difference. I never waas good at slanng, you see? I'm just so veryy un'cool. I don't even know what the navy, or nautical has to do with this at all...."

"Soph, you're makin' no sense. It's three AM....never thought I'd get drunk dialed by you of all people. You're always so together. You okay over there?"

"I know, right? But I had all this wine and I figured why not just drink it. Wine is greaat. And so is Brandi apparently. At least you never made a big video for her saying how great she is. That I know of. You have like five-hundred thousand videos... I haven't even reached one thousand yet. I reached a hundred a while back, though. Soon, I'll hit five-hundred..."

"Oh god, are you jealous? You know that was from like years ago, right? She moved out to Vegas, I ain't seen her in years!"

"What?" she said. She tried to focus on the video, but the letters and numbers seemed blurred. Boats and ships, a comment full of nothing but something trying to make a dog out of zeroes and ones, something about smoking weed every day, and other bizarre, intangible things.

"Sophie!"

She dropped the phone. Suddenly, sleeping seemed like a great idea. She stumbled off towards the bedroom, uncaring of the things she upended on the way.

*

Sophie groaned and tried to turn over, only to end up in a shuddering fetal position, before crawling back to lie on her stomach. It made the nausea so much worse, but The throbbing in her head only increased.

In retrospect, that second helping of wine hadn't been the best idea. Especially on a work day. Except with her, it was always a work day. Maybe in the next twenty years she'd get a vacation. Probably only when she was the next big business lady leveling the field, and inspiring fear in everyone around her.

She'd surely have it all by forty-five. She just had to wait. And then working through her twenties and thirties would be all worth it.

There was a horrible pounding in her head. She rubbed at her temples, but it only made it worse. Like there was a rubber ball slamming around in her head. The cause of that pounding became very apparent, when the door opened. Liam held up a blue tumbler with I put the Ass In Awesome written across the front.

"Good to see you up again."

She clutched the blanket tight against her.

"Oh god, We didn't..." Sophie said.

"Oh, hell no. When I sleep with somebody, I damn well want them to remember every single detail for the rest of their lives. I just came by to bring you somethin'. You sounded super fucked up, and when the phone hit the floor I got worried. Did you get dumped or somethin'?"

She pulled the pillow over her head and groaned. "Something like that."

"Somethin' like that? You need me to punch somebody? Geez, what kind of idiot would dump you?"

"It isn't like that. I'm just being completely unreasonable," she said.

"You ain't unreasonable. Maybe a little shitfaced, okay a lot shitfaced, but hey, I done worse. You should see what happened when I drank too much. In fact, I can find the videos in a minute. Drunk Minecraft one through thirty nine."

Sophie closed her eyes to try and stem the throbbing in her head. It wasn't working.

"Got the day off?" Liam said.

"Off?" Sophie said.

"Well, it's twelve and you're still in bed," Liam said.

"What? I've never taken a single sick day! Oh, fuck, the Administrator is going to kill me!"
She threw the covers back. The cold on her back made her realize that at some point, she'd stripped down to nothing but panties. She let out a shriek and pulled her covers back up. Thankfully, she had been still lying on her stomach, so all he got a view of was her back.

"Purple and lacy, nice. Didn't think you were that type."

"Oh, shut up."

"Hey, you're the one who was flashin' me," Liam said.

"I--forgot I wasn't wearing anything," she said.

"I sure ain't goin' to forget. Anyways, blame it on me. Say I made you stay up late in the interview or somethin'," he said.

"I already submitted that. I can't use that excuse anymore," she muttered into the pillow. And he wasn't even her client anymore. The Administrator had just taken it from her, when she had worked so hard.

"I don't know, make it sound like I'm one of those super diva clients that needs constant attention, or somethin'. I'll be glad to take the fall."

There was actually some promise in that. She could definitely work with the needs constant attention angle.

Sophie took a deep breath. She couldn't put it off any longer. Bubbly Brenda was bound to come for the case soon. She always was so perky, and such a hard worker. She'd have Sophie's job as assistant if she kept messing up like this.

"Hey, Liam...." Sophie cleared her throat. "Um, I got reassigned on the case. I'm not working it anymore."

"Wait, what―the deal is off?"

"No, it's still going strong. But they needed me overseas. So Brenda Jones is going to be handling it."

Liam clutched his phone tight. "What the hell? How could they give that case to someone else? You worked so hard for it!"

She rubbed at her temples. "I agree, but not so loud, please--"

"Yeah, gotcha. Sorry about that. Uh--Did I mess up somewhere?"

"No, no. The Administrator just―she does stuff like that. Nobody ever has a chance to get complacent, because she'll reassign them of get them fired. Nobody is safe, really. ...Not even me."

For years she'd been the Administrator's attack dog. Sometimes she forgot that she wasn't immune. She let herself think the Administrator really favored her. Like all those dreams of becoming some ruthless woman's protege and becoming the kind of woman who had an empire of her own.

"But, it's not like we'll never see each other again," Sophie said. She forced a smile.

It was with a pang, she realized that Brenda might actually do a better job than her. She was happily married, with two adorable children, both with curly blond hair and angelic smiles. Brenda wouldn't let her feelings get in the way of a job. Brenda wouldn't end up in Are you nasty? shorts, or spend her nights drunk-dialing her clients after getting drunk and watching their videos from years ago.

I always thought I had to all together. But apparently, I was a lot worse off than I ever realized. And it wasn't until I met you that I realized just how empty and unhappy my life was.

"Oh, I almost forget." He held out a bag, and a clear tumbler filled with something orange. "Take this, it'll help."

She took a sip, only to taste some kind of citrus smoothie. Her mouth was still bitter, but now less dry. She took a few more sips, but couldn't quite place the rest of the flavors. Mentally, she wondered if it was alcoholic. A Hair of the Dog type of drink, but with oranges instead.

"You'll be back to feelin' human in no time," Liam said proudly.

"A little quieter, please," she said.

"Oh, sorry," Liam said.

She opened the bag, and an aroma of greasy heaven wafted up. She took a bite of the bacon cheesy extreme burger.

Usually, she was a protein shake boughten at the local juice bar because she had no time for anything else type of girl. But she gladly sank her teeth into the McEggsomething. The grease had never tasted better, and the crunchy bacon almost made her forget the throbbing in her head.

"Mmgohgod."

"That'll make that hangover go right away. We got this hangover doctor who visits sometimes. He's from Scotland, apparently it's his second job. The first one is top secret, but apparently takes swords. We're bettin' better treasure hunter and literal pirate. Also, he's an LPer too! He's real busy."

Liam looked to the side, as if there might somebody else. With Liam's friends, there never was any telling when you'd get some screaming Irish man with a rather gruesome username involving eyes popping up on one of Liam's Prank'd videos.

"I think he might be James Bond."

"James Bond is fictional, and English, for that matter," she said.

"Yeah, but real spies ain't, and he's definitely got some top-secret job. Oh, by the way, you know, I had a hand in makin' this burger," Liam said.

"Great, tell me another time, I'm super late to work," Sophie said.

"Another time?" Liam said. He smirked, like he'd gotten a major victory.

Leave Liam to think that another time meant later today.

She reached out towards the side of the bed, only to realize there was no robe or shirt stashed there. Usually it wouldn't be that much of a problem, but today she had an audience. And as much as Liam would've loved it, she was not giving him a flashdance. Not when she was this hungover, anyways.

"Um, Liam," she said.

"Happy to help."

"You either have to leave or---" He had already opened one of her drawers. The top one, to be precise. He let out a low whistle. "Daaaamn."

"That's my underwear drawer," she said.

"Damn right it is. Talk about a front-row seat to heaven," Liam said happily. He closed it with some reluctance, and moved to the next. "Got any preference?"

"I don't care, just throw something my way!" She shuddered and clutched her head.

"I'm guessin' you don't want want this one which says drunken whore across the front in sparkly stuff, right?" Liam said.

Her cheeks flushed bright pink. Back in college, she'd been a bridesmaid for her cousin.That cousin had made a party full of edgy things like penis shot glasses at a strip club and made all her bridesmaids wear that monstrosity. Sophie had never gotten around to throwing it out.

"Liam--

He chuckled. "I got it." He peered in her closet this time, and tossed a lavender shirt with white dots her way. She gripped it in one hand, and pulled the blanket around her, like a cape and rose up to pluck it from the floor.

"You need a skirt or you just goin' real casual Friday?" Liam said. He lifted up a skirt from her closet. "Bedazzled denim, huh? I didn't know you had it in you."

Sh looked back at him. "It was the eighties. If you didn't have at least one thing of bedazzled denim, you were officially deported to China."

"God, you've got to show me your yearbook pics. Please tell me you had big wavy hair."

"I looked mostly the same. Except sometimes, there was bedazzled denim," she said.

"Oh, c'mon, it's awesome to see this side of you." He tossed a black pencil skirt her way. She'd just have to go without hose today.

She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror on the wall where she did her daily breathing exercises. Her mascara had dripped down her face in some grotesque horror mask, and her hair was somewhere between wild child raised by wolves and eighties rock band. It was not a good look on her.

"Oh god, I look like a Halloween costume. Hell, I look like something that comes out of the depths in a horror movie!"

"Nah, you look fine. You rock it, like some punk thing. Like you were goin' as a zombie girl for Halloween. I like it."

"That's nice, but my boss isn't going to!"

"I got this," Liam said. He grabbed her phone off the table, and flicked through her contacts.

"Yo, boss lady! I told Soph I would do that contract stuff unless she had a drinkin' contest with me. Turns out she can take like a thimble before she gets totally smashed. Also her alarm blew up...not my fault. Anyways, blame it all on me. No need to yell at her, all right?" He clicked the end call, and winked. "See, easy-peasy. Kissin' me as a thank you ain't necessary, but it's greatly encouraged."

Her mind reeled. "I can't believe you spoke to the Administrator like that. People who talk to her like that don't tend to survive."

"What's she goin' to do? Fire me? I did them all a favor by optin' in to this RED bullshit. Like oooh, I can save videos. Ain't like there's a bunch of apps and shit for that, I totally wanna spend 10 dollars a month on that," Liam said.

"Uh, she could to delete your entire channel once she finishes acquiring Youtube," Sophie said. Though Google was holding on damn hard, despite her attempts to pry it free.

"So? She don't own Twitch. And If not, there's Dailymotion and Steamit. My fans will go wherever I am. I'll start my damn site if she keeps on like that," she said.

"That's nice but---I really have to to--"

He reached into his brown bag and tossed something to her. It was a can of Axe body spray, specifically a type called Super Sexy.

"Here you go, my secret weapon," Liam said.

"You would wear Axe," Sophie said. She wrapped the blanket around her, and slipped into the backroom.

"Course I would, that's classy shit, but not like asshole classy. Like hot classy. Plus, the chicks love it."

"Don't believe the ads," she said.

She heard a ping on his phone, and then laughter. "Somebody on tumblr sent me an anon ask sayin' my ass personally made them believe in life and happiness again."

Sophie leaned against the door, glad that he couldn't see her flushed cheeks, and the expression on her face.

No more drunk Youtubing. No more sending drunken anon messages at 3AM. She'd honestly thought that part, at least, had been a dream.

"That's, um, nice, but I really have to---"

"Get to work, I know. Get to showerin'! I'll be rootin' for you."

"Thanks," she said.

It wasn't every day she got someone cheerleading her on in the shower.

This wasn't the first time she'd had a shower moment. She scrubbed at her face and tried to look alive. All the last night things came back. Binge watching videos, the call, the messages, and Brandi-with-an-I drunk-dialing.

At least it'd been anonymous and not on her company social media. Oh, she'd get in so much trouble for that. Even the thought made her cringe. Decades of work undone by one drunken night.

The memories had come back all too clear. Had she seriously drunk dialed Liam Dempsey? And not just that, jealously drunk dialed, about some one he apparently hooked up with three years ago, not days after the video he made for her, as she'd thought in her wine haze.

The one with the reminder to tell the ones you love that they matter.

A video where they were very much not dating, and would continue to be not dating.

Her mascara revealed that at one point she'd cried last night. Thankfully, her mind had blacked out at that point, and she was spared having to relive those memories. She hoped for the sake of her dignity that the memory loss was permanent.

"Thanks, alcohol. I needed that," she said.

She didn't have time to put on makeup. She'd have to go a little more natural, at least until she got to the bathroom at work. Then she could slap on some lipstick, and hope the Administrator was busy with a meeting.

Liam sat on her bed when she came out. He smiled up at her.

"Yo, you got like fifty-thousand texts. This thing sounds like a dubstep song with way it's been buzzin'."

She'd tried to figure out dubstep once, but all she could guess was that people ironically listened to it as a joke, because it sounded like cars being put through crushers most of the time.

With growing alarm, she picked up her phone and started to look through her messages.

"They're all from Bidwell. Uh-oh. Oh, no, no, no."

"Like, coworker, Bidwell?" Liam said. She saw his jaw tighten.

"That's the one. And only, that is."

Funny enough, she'd never drunk dialed Bidwell. Or anyone but Liam. She usually just passed out after a couple bottles of wine. Before Liam, she didn't do ridiculous things like jump into a bouncy castle, or watch Youtube videos of professional video gamers on a stripping pole, and then save those videos in her own private playlists for very stressful work days. She certainly never drunk-dialed anyone. She never had anyone to drunk dial.

"We never dated or anything like that; he's just a co-worker," she said.

Dammit, Sophie. He doesn't need to know that!

The tension in his jaw eased.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. I thought you talked to him?"

"Once by accident. He got like, lost in a zoo and had to go. Real abrupt, and I heard roarin' over the line? It was wild," Liam said.

"Ah, zoos," Sophie said. "Never a good match with Saxton Hale."

Saxton Hale was banned from most zoos in the world, but sometimes he snuck in. To him any place that kept animals captive, and where he couldn't punch them, was a crime against nature.

"Anyways, I--"

"Gotta get to work, got it," Liam said. He tipped his hat, and headed out.

Books she'd never had the time to read left on the floor, an end table turned on its side. Thankfully her 'minimalist' living kept tons of broken things as low as possible. She bent down to scoop them up and place them back on the small white and unpronounceable shelf-slash-bookcase she'd acquired at IKEA.

In her vocabulary, minimalism was short for 'I never had time to decorate.'

She peered back in the bedroom, half expecting him to be draped across her bed in a bunny outfit. Playboy, not fursuit, though for all she knew, he had the latter as well. All that greeted her was messy covers and regrets, aka empty wine bottles. Wow, she'd polished down way more than she remembered. Then again, it all became a blur of bad choices at some point. The only "bad choices bingo" squares she hadn't managed were impromptu wedding in Vegas, and publishing nudes and frankly, she wasn't sure that a few more weeks with this much wine wouldn't get her a blackout of both the hungover and bingo varieties.

He was was seated on her steps, waiting for her as she jiggled the lock and set the alarm.

"Um, thanks--I really have to go, though--"

"Gotcha, good luck fighting the dragons and stormin' the castle!"

She lifted one eyebrow. Well, more than one person had thought of the Administrator as the dragon, but the castle? That was a new one.

"Wait, don't tell me you never saw The Princess Bride? You're kiddin' me! I have to fix that. Next time, preferably when you're sober, though drunk watchin' it is fun, too."

She did a slightly awkward finger wave and rushed out towards her car.

*

The Administrator looked her once over with a critical eye. Sophie's business smile froze on her face. Under her boss's scrutiny, suddenly everything she forgot to do came to mind.

"You're late, and reeking of Axe body spray," The Administrator said.

"There was a malfunction with my---alarm. I also was very sick this morning, and there was awful traffic," Sophie said. It came out as one long babble. Oh shit, she was this close to being fired.

The Administrator raised one eyebrow. "Ill during the morning?"

"Oh, no. That's very much not a problem. Really. Nothing to worry about there! Um, It was one of those twenty-four hour flus, I think. I got it yesterday night and it's all gone."

The kind that came from ingesting too much wine the previous night.

"I got a message from the Youtuber," The Administrator said. She always manged to speak that word like the vilest curse imaginable.

Dread filled Sophie. "O-oh?" She cleared her throat, and tried to put on a brave face.

"Oh yeah, we were working on the case. He came by my place to get some information about the licensing. The contracts are still being negotiated. I-it wasn't anything untoward, of course. He's just precocious, and grabbed my phone while I was in the restroom," Sophie said.

Untoward? Good Lord, she sounded like a grandmother. If Liam heard her like this, he'd crack jokes for years.

The Administrator's eyes narrowed. "Did you forget that you are reassigned? Please tell me bought the tickets."

"Oh, of course I bought them. I was just telling him that I was reassigned. He wanted to go over some last things. And....he's not happy about being reassigned."

Which wasn't entirely a lie. He had gone over her drawers. Which had to count for something.

"He will get over it."

But the Administrator had already turned around to face another screen.

Right, case closed. She'd expected more of a tongue-lashing than this.

"Was there anything else you needed, Administrator?"

"The Shanghai case, Miss Pauling. After you meet them, they'll be over here." The Administrator said without turning around.

"Got it," Sophie said. She let out a sigh of relief as the doors closed behind her. Somehow, she'd made it. Now, if she could just make it through the rest of the day, and all the inevitable fuck ups of her other co-workers, that'd be great.

*

She left most of her texts unread until lunch time. Only then, with a bagel and coffee, did she check her messages. There was a series of messages from last night, each one with more question marks, a Liam asked how she was over and over. She scrolled down, until she came to the newest one, sent an hour ago.

so soph like what the hell was up with last night?

She typed in a response.

Oh thaaat. That was drunk Sophie. Please delete them and forget they ever happened.

He responded within seconds.

drunk soph watches videos of me strippin?

To be fair, so did sober Sophie. Not that she was about to let him know that.

It was an autoplay. And it wasn't the stripping one, it was the one where you played with Brandi-With-An-I. Anyways, just...forget about that. I was drunk and not thinking clearly. Trust me, if I had a time machine, it never would've happened.

Just when she was getting on track of not being a complete mess around him.

thatd be a shame. never woulda guessed u had a drunken whore sparkly shirt.

I told you, it was a bridesmaid thing. I couldn't get out of it.

no worries. id help u get out of it.

Yes, you're helpful like that.

u know what I think?

I'm sure it's something about getting into my pants.

o yeah, that too.

It was like her professionalism just vanished whenever he was in the vicinity. Suddenly she wasn't Stone Cold Pauling, she was the type of girl who jumped on bouncy castles, went skateboarding, and got drunk and jealous over old videos. And these texts had backflipped away from professional to outright flirting banter.

She wasn't even the jealous type. An ex-boyfriend had cheated on her, and she'd simply cut him out of her life. She hadn't cried, just left his things at the curb and informed him that if he wanted to get them, he'd better get there before the trash man did. It was a series of check lists. Delete his contact out of her phone, delete all messages from him, delete him from her life.

But somehow, Liam got under her skin in a way nobody else had.

I think u just need to let loose.

If anything, I'm letting loose a little too much.

Flirting with her client, playing video games with a client, more flirting with her client, being drunken and jealous over her client, at this rate the only step she hadn't taken yet is sleeping with him. And at the rate she was going, it wouldn't be long.

Former client, now. Now it'd be Bubbly Blond Brenda Jones who came over and jumped on bouncy castles. At that bitter thought, Sophie inwardly sighed. Brenda had a happy marriage and as far as she knew, didn't drink the way she did. She managed to work and have a life of her own.

nah its like u been kepin it in for so long so much work u cant hold it in anymore. all this work is killin u. So ur goin wild and livin again.

He put into words everything she'd been ignoring. The dark circles under her eyes, the empty bottles she tripped over every morning, the smiles she forced as she did the dirty work of the Administrator and sacrificed another weekend. The friends and family who had faded out of her life when work became so all-encompassing that it took up every part of her.

So, what do you recommend, Doctor 69?

this dr prescribes moar video games, with a side of sexy. take two and call me baby in the mornin.

She couldn't help but laugh.

Okay, fine. I'll try and get over there, as long as you don't me showing up way late.

anytime. i can have a key made for u.

A key already? Aren't you afraid I'd, I don't know, rob you blind?

ur welcome to my swag shirts. always knew u wanted in my pants.

Yes, I want nothing more than your neon, poorly spelled swag shirts from Walmart.

trade u for the drunken whore shirt.

You want to wear it?

i will if u will.

Fine. Give me camera proof. I'll show up late.

ill be waitin.

Sophie laughed as she put her phone back in her purse. Lunch may have been over, but the flirting sure wasn't.

*

Technically, she had a Shanghai case to get ready for. But, she could spare a half hour, Sophie supposed.

"Hey, there you are! I'm real glad you got out of there alive," Liam said.

"Oh, she was livid. Thankfully I had a great excuse. There was a huge crater on the way to work. One of those sink holes? Traffic was backed up for miles."

"Nice. See, I told you I'd help you out."

Wait, was he taking claim for changing the weather? Or maybe he was joking. She pushed it out of her mind as she stepped through the door.

She held out the shirt. And maybe, she'd sprayed it with her perfume. A last minute thought, that for once, wasn't from alcohol. Even with the warning bells and alarms that this definitely went way past harmless flirting and into a whole different territory, she ignored the warnings and went on.

She held up a very bright red one with U Can't Catch Me in large white letters across the front.

"This should be burned," she said.

"I'm sure it'll light up the minute you put it on," Liam said.

Damn, that was smooth. So smooth that he left her speechless. But he didn't miss a beat, and motioned her in.
"Anyways, make yourself at home!"

His hat was off, and he kept nervously smoothing back his hair, which had been gelled back. And his clothes--the only explanation she could find was he had lost a bet with someone. Maybe Jack---the Pirate, not Septic. Markiplier seemed much too kind to banish Liam into the argyle realm of nerdom.

"Is that argyle? You look like a nerd. I thought you'd beat up someone dressed like that," she said. Not a shuttershade or snapback in sight.

"Ain't that your type?" Liam said. He flashed the sort of smile that belonged in a Colgate commercial.

"Don't you usually just assume you're every woman's type on earth?" Sophie said.

"You got me there," Liam said.

He smoothed his hair back back again, and took a breath, like he was rehearsing. She'd never seen him so agitated. "So, see anythin' you like?"

"Oh yes, nothing makes me hotter than argyle sweater vests," she said dryly.

"Well, it is pretty hot in here, or maybe that's just me," Liam said.

He pulled off the sweater vest. His polo shirt was red, without even a pithy comment or a hint of neon. He looked like something out of that Lonely Island video about boats. She'd had to watch the entire music video collection to try and describe why everyone in the office kept remarking that they had done things 'like a boss.'

"What are you playing today?" she said.

"Checked the poll from the fans today, and they want to see bread content. Well, bread content is what they get."

"Bread content? So what...eating a whole loaf of bread in one sitting? Or like...." She tried to remember the challenge, but came up short. "That one challenge, with the pepper and the milk?"

She tentatively picked up the controller and lifted it up, as if it might burn her. The screen flickered, and she saw a menu screen of a bread on journeys. Through the bathroom, a retro world with guns and for some reason, jars of pee, among many other locales.

"I was going to do this one with my doctor, but he had doctor-y stuff to do. How lame is that? So I guess it's you any me," he said. He grinned as she sat near to him.

"Sentient bread? That's a new one," she said.

"Yeah, this game supposedly is hard as balls. It's goin' to be great. This game really kicked Markiplier's ass, he even took it while suckin' on a pepper," Liam said. He shook his head. "I swear that guy dances with death about ten times a day."

"...is that supposed to be an ironic metaphor? Balls aren't that hard...Unless you mean steel balls."

"Oh man, you're great already! That one is definitely coming in. I think a game like this is best blind. And no worries, I put on the controller support."

She gripped the controller, and started to tap at the buttons, but nothing happened.

"How do I play this?" she said.

"Dunno yet, just booted it up. I got gifted it from the devs who made it, 'cause they enjoyed the one I did of Surgeon Simulator with my doc. He even said it's pretty accurate to how he works, complete with the laughing and screaming about how he has no idea, and flying organs going all over."

"What's his name again?" Sophie said. So I can make sure to never ever go there, she added silently.

"Erich Humbolt. He's German or somethin'."

She pulled out her phone and made a note. That was definitely the doctor covered by her health insurance. The guy looked like a walking future lawsuit.

She frantically pushed at the buttons. The little bread that couldn't only inched along, only to flop over right onto the floor.

"Nothing's moving!"

She let out a shriek of surprise as the illogically walking bread fell to the floor. She scrambled to smash each button, her mind losing all trace of the controls in the panic.

"Hey, that's a good scream."

She was all but slamming the buttons now. The bread stuck, and pushed straight into something very yellow, with broken glass all over the floor.

"Oh, shit, shit shit! Please tell me that yellow stuff I just fell into is lemonade."

"Nope, not unless it's recycled lemonade, if you know what I mean."

She let the controller fall into her lap. "Ughhh, I can't do this. I can't. This game is impossible."

"Hand it here." Liam kept laughing as the time ran out and the bread fell over in soggy defeat.

"So piss is your limit? Good to know," Liam said.

"Was that a bomb? Why would the floor be covered in pee? Why are there bombs in the kitchen? Is there a maid simulator where I can clean the place, then hit whoever trashed it with brooms until they learn how to properly use a toilet?"

Liam just laughed harder. "That's his weapon! Jars of pee! Jarate!"

"I mean jars of pee. Who could ever think this was a good idea? Who would ever throw that in the house---there's glass everywhere. He throws his own pee at people? Really? What's next, fart bombs?"

"You should send that to them, I bet it would really catch on," Liam said.

"Ughhh." She started to rub at her temples. "This is like the equivalent of slamming my finger in the door repeatedly."

"Shit, this is hard," he said. He laughed to himself. "That's what she said."

The bread fell into bomb after bomb. One point where he almost reached the refridgerator, he suddenly lost grip and the poor bread fell right into the yellow puddle that was certainly not lemonade. Its edibility decreased at an alarming rate with a loud crackling noise which was the grating sound of her nightmares. He jerked the controller so hard, it pulled out. As he reached out to tr and save the controller, she leaned forward too. Tangled up, they both fell down together. She ended up on top, just as she liked it.

"Actually, natch that. This game is the best," Liam said.

She let out a long breath. "That was....fun. Really fun. Awful but So much fun."

Fun because he was there. Hell, he could make going to the damn DMV fun.

"You looked like you were freakin' out right there," Liam said.

"It was! But it was so ridiculous and--I don't know, I can't explain it. I hated it and couldn't stop laughing all at once."

His lips were very close, and frankly she was surprised that he hadn't made a move. After all, she was lying on top of him. It was more than a little sexual. Him in his ridiculous argyle and polos. It had to be for something later, she thought. Or a dare he wouldn't fess up to. Somewhere in his various social media would be the key.

"Sophie..."

A loud noise came over the game. Sophie glanced up in such alarm, she slammed her head against the coffee table.

"Ow..."

"Soph! You okay?"

She felt the back of her head, but felt no blood.

"I'm going to have one hell of a brusie tomorrow," she said.

The moment was broken. She cleared her throat and pushed herself up, and back to the couch.

"I'm just goin' to lie here a bit," he said.

"Losing a game about sentient bread and pee jars was that exhausting?" she said.

"Nah, nah, just--See, you're tryin' to pick it apart, but that's what you're missin'. It's like playin' Mario Kart with your pals and wantin' to toss 'em out a window when they shelled you. It's like bein' a part of somethin' bigger than yourself."

"Like something bigger..." Sophie said.

"Yeah! Everybody's always lookin' for somethin' bigger than themselves, they all got dreams and it's never enough. But here, it's always enough. You can just chill out with your friends and laugh about the damn bread game. It's one of those games you need somebody to go through it with."

He was a lot deeper than he seemed.

"You want to go a round of Rocket League once your head feels better?"

"Just as long as there isn't a secret breadbox level. I don't think bread games are my forte."

"Can you do somethin' for me? Can you say 'bread is evil' ? that'll be a great soundbite."

"Bread is evil," she said flatly.

"C'mon! Put some more feelin' into it," Liam said.

She took a deep breath, and grimaced. "Bread. Is. Evil!"

"Better! I'll make that the openin'!"

Liam made finger guns to the camera. "The evilest bread around."

She couldn't help but laugh at this faux-James Bond impression.

"Oh, God. It's way later than I though. I think I'll have to take an IOU."

"So, you wanna come for the next stream?" Liam said.

"Oh, I'll be in Shanghai then," she said.

Liam looked like he'd been punched in the gut. "....You're movin'?"

"No, I told you, it's just a business trip. Don't worry, I'll be back in a week or two."

Liam rubbed at his forehead. "God, you about killed me there. Can we text?"

"Yeah, go for it," she said.

Liam grinned. "Then the days won't be so bad. I'll miss having bread content with you, though."

"If you keep trying to bring up bread content, I'm going to stay in Shanghai," she said.

"Sopphhhhhh."

She laughed. "Really, it won't take much time at all. If I'm lucky, it'll only take a weekend."

"Hope so," Liam said.

He got up and left her on the couch. They hadn't kissed, but it'd been more intimate than that. She pulled out her purse and kept searching for something--anything--just to distract her mind from how fast she was falling.

*

That night, instead of a nightcap, she pulled on his stupid swag shirt. She didn't hate Axe body spray any longer. Far be from it, rather than horrible flashbacks to middle school, she was reminded of him. Surprisingly, she managed to fall asleep without sleeping pills or alcohol, or both.

The next morning, his Instagram was apparently spoof instagram model day. His selfie was in messy sheets all wrapped around him. All he wore was the famous Are you Nasty? shorts, and her drunken whore shirt. Somehow, he'd managed to fit in it, but oh it was tight. Sleek muscles rippled underneath those sequins.

She laid back, already a little breathless. She was ready to hit sleep on every alarm inside her ringing, and sleep with him instead of listening to anything like common sense. If he could wreck her, then she was ready for that car crash.

*

Sophie had never been one for souvenirs. A good deal was enough of a memory for her. But as she waited for her contact, Sophie found herself scanning the vendors down the busy street. Had Liam ever tried Bubble tea? Would he like a shirt with garbled text? Would they even be in his size, for that matter? Bidwell had warned her that the Chinese sizing chart was completely different.

These shirts might fit her, but his shoulders were much more broad.

This was how her thoughts went these days. Before Liam, it would've been I wonder what the stock price of this is, I should check. Now when she saw shirts with gibberish on them, she couldn't help but think of him. He'd started a quiet revolution in her. One where she became more than the enforcer, the executioner. One where she stepped back and looked at her life and wondered what else?

What else was there?

A familiar voice broke her reverie.

Bidwell waved. "Sophie!"

"I tried to text you, but I didn't get any response."

"Sorry. My battery was dead at the flight."

"You know, they make things for that. What are they called--Power packs?"

Power packs. It sounded like something out of a comic. She had Liam to thank for that thought. In fact, she had him to thank for a lot of thoughts these days.

"I'll have to buy one. I'm just always busy with work," Sophie said.

"I know how that is. Saxton Hale is always trying to go off to some foreign place." Bidwell let out a sigh. "I'm so jetlagged.

"Then it's got to be a nice break working on this case," Sophie said.

"A break? He's looking for yetis in the mountains," Bidwell said.

Considering yetis were probably not even real, he'd probably be looking for a long time.

*

The Shanghai was going wonderfully so far, though this one was Bidwell's win. He'd pulled a great last minute move, and won over the clients right into talks of contracts, even when other companies had been courting their accounts. But hours into the contract discussions, the clients wanted take out, so it was take out they had for the late dinner. It had been drilled into her psyche that the important clients got what they wanted--as long as it was within the Administrator's wishes, of course.

She walked under the flashing neon sign of a restaurant called The Fortune Cookie. Inside were rows upon rows of lanterns hanging from the ceiling. The decor was decidedly neon and modern. Even the lucky cat at the front had a backwards cap laid over it.

"They thought we'd want something more American," Bidwell said. "Apparently it became a hit when the Chinese Millennials wanted fortune cookies and the familiar take out box of sitcoms."

They got a seat near the windows. The large shuttered blinds closed out the view of the city around them. She ordered the sweet and sour chicken, though the rest of the businessmen spoke too fast for her to catch what they ordered. Bidwell chatted with the man next to him, lapsing into Mandarin. When the businessman got up for something--she wasn't about to ask why--she leaned in.

"I didn't know you spoke Chinese. Wait, was there a memo? Did I miss a language summit?" her voice grew just a little panicked.

Bidwell chuckled. "No, I get that from my mother's side. I'm sure my accent is atrocious, though. She's always telling me I need to work on it."

He'd never opened up to her like that before, even that much. Her co-workers all treated her like a shark that might one day devour them. Conversations stopped as soon as she walked in. People stepped away and to hunch back over their computers in hope that she wouldn't fire them.

She'd liked that, once. To her, it meant she was that much closer to the top. People treated her like they treated the Administrator. But after the Fortune magazine article, she'd started to have some realizations.

One, it was lonely at the top. She'd been so focused, she hadn't realized until Liam made her think twice about, well, everything. Two, they didn't treat her like the Administrator--they knew she was the Administrator's attack dog.

The businessmen returned. They lapsed into Chinese again. She wondered if she could discreetly pull out her phone to get a language app. From Bidwell's expression, she could tell they'd gotten the deal. She felt a little pang of irritation. If she'd known she was being assigned, she would've brushed up on her Chinese enough be something.

The only thing she could guess was she was a threat. The attack dog sent to make sure no one on this trip slacked off or failed.

When the Fortune cookies came, Bidwell held back.

"Ladies first," Bidwell said.

"Might as well, though Lord knows I don't need the calories," Sophie said. Especially not after she finished so much that she didn't even have any to take home in a little paper container. To be fair, she'd skipped lunch to work on the case.

She opened up the fortune cookie and pulled out the little piece of paper hidden within. She never took much stock in things like horoscopes, psychic readings, fate or fortune.

Seize the day.

Wait, that was...Carpe Deim. That wasn't even a Chinese proverb. They weren't even trying, just simply putting on random sayings probably picked via a search engine.

"Those were for the tourists. The clients were laughing about it. What'd yours say?" Bidwell said.

She held it out.

His brow furrowed. "Isn't Latin?"

"Yeah. What does yours say?"

Bidwell sighed. "Beware of zoos."

"Okay, yours might be real," Sophie said.

If she seized her day anymore, she'd probably die of exhaustion. So, she wasn't where she wanted to be, but she was definitely working towards it. Bit by bit. But one thought kept twisting and turning in her.

If I died today, would I be satisfied?

The answer was a resounding no.

She wasn't nearly as far in her job as she wanted. Everything else just had to go to the backseat for that. But at what point would her life finally be where she wanted it? Here she was at twenty-five, not an incredibly wealthy and acclaimed CEO.

Sophie had many questionable points in her life. But being very aware of a damned takeout fortune cookie telling her to seize the day, and interpreting it as seize life by the balls--specifically, his balls, well, that was flashing neon yellow question mark level questionable.

"I just have to get him out of my system," she muttered.

"Did you say something?" Bidwell said.

She folded the fortune in half and stuck it into her purse. "Nothing. I just was reminding myself that I had to do something. Since the deal is done, I've got someone―er, something that I've got to do. Other clients to take care of, you know."

"You're heading back earlier than 4AM? Wait until the office betting pool hears about this," Bidwell said.

"You know me, always the workaholic," Sophie said wryly.

"Oh, good job on the deal, by the way. It's nice to know you can wrangle it almost as good as you wrangle Saxton Hale," Sophie said.

"Thanks. I'm just suddenly glad my mother made me keep it up, even if my accent is bad."

*

She took the red-eye flight home. Airplanes lulled her to sleep, which was good, as the flight was a good eighteen hours long.

Sophie had a wardrobe full of suits, the occasional casual wear which could double as office clothes, and the most comfortable underwear and bras known to humankind. Thankfully, the mall lingerie store stayed open twenty-four hours.

It seemed obscene to pay this much for some lace connected by thread barely bigger than dental floss that was only going to be on for a few seconds before it ended up on the floor, but she was not pulling off her sensible dress to reveal panties which would've been in fashion in 1801. Liam had already seen the contents of her underwear drawer by accident last time, and somehow not managed to be scared off. She wasn't going to take another chance.

Denial only went so far when she was drinking wine by the bottle, watching his stripping videos one-handed late into the night. She was waking up sweaty and frustrated, from dreams too ribald to divulge to anyone. Obviously he was like some kind of fever she just had to sweat out. Then, once the tension was gone, and her hormones weren't blinding her, she could go back to being Stone Cold Pauling.

Besides, he technically wasn't even her client anymore.

Sophie knew how to work a deal. Sometimes she had to do extensive talks, sometimes she had to work contracts deep into the night, and in the case of Liam, sometimes the tension had to be meticulously fucked out.

Her mind blanked on the thought of tomorrow, or even defining what they were. Less than lovers, friends only in a sense. On the precipice of both.

She took a deep breath. "Right, get him out of my system."

Then she could go back to prioritizing her job over everything, and working herself into exhaustion. It'd pay off eventually.

Even as she said the words, little memories of the drunk-dialing, the feeling like flying with him on that skateboard, the taste of pizza, after an exhilarating hour of video games.

*

The light in his living room window assuaged her first fear, that she'd get dressed up for nothing. She steeled herself, and knocked at the door.

Liam broke into a grin as he saw her.

"Sophie! I just got done doin' a stream. Hey, lookin' good, good lookin'!" Liam said.

"You always say that," she said.

"Because I got eyes, and it's true," he said.

"You said that the day I was hungover," she said.

"What can I say? Those panties were pretty cute. Come on in. Didja eat already?" he said.

"Yeah, I grabbed something before I went shopping."

"Got some groceries, huh? Good, I hate it when you forget to eat."

"Trust me, I make up for it with liquid dinners," she said dryly.

He gave her a look.

"If it's good enough for hobos, it's good enough for me," Sophie said. She brushed her hair behind her ears. "Could you point me the way to your bathroom--for my lipstick, I think I have it on my teeth."

"You forgot already?" Liam said. "You changed it the top one before."

"I mean a first floor bathroom. I'm not climbing that many stairs in these heels," she said.

He pointed down the hall. "Sure thing, the john's that way if you gotta take a leak. Third door on the right. Can't miss it. You don't have to apologize for havin' to take a leak, you know."

"I really do need to just powder my nose," she said.

"Thought you had lipstick on your teeth," he said.

"I need both, okay?" she said.

He chuckled. "Girls. Always hidin' stuff. Like so you farted or sweated, whatever. Nobody cares."

"Right, I'll just--" She walked down the hallway before things got awkward. She was too sober to deal with awkward.

She always kept a secret flask of vodka for those harder days at work. The bathrooms were the one room which didn't have cameras--due to it being illegal and all--and Vodka never showed on her breath. Whenever things got too tough, she'd steal away a swallow. Not enough to make it show, but enough to get through an eighteen hour day.

But today, she didn't dare lapse into relying on her old friend. She wanted to be wide awake and remember every single detail of this night. So when the worries started, she took several deep breaths and talked herself through it.

You are an adult, and can fuck whoever you want. Plenty of people do the no-strings attached sex thing, and he'll be one...er, the one one night stand you ever have, that is.

Maybe a few strings attached. Just a little. A teensy bit. Like wrists tied to the headboard strings.

She peeled off her usual purple pencil skirt and lavender blouse. It was slightly damp from the rain, despite hr coat. She wasn't sure if she wanted to applaud the fact that while he'd checked her out, he'd been a gentleman about it, or be slightly disappointed that she didn't get carried off to bed two steps in, and have those wet clothes ripped off her willing body.

The black cocktail dress had a v-neck, with a hint of black lace that matched her black lacy bra and panty set she'd picked up. It was sleeveless, and best of all, fairly easy to remove. No long line of buttons, no strings to draw up the back.

She'd tried to tease her hair into something sexy and fun, and instead she looked just unbrushed and messy. Sophie sighed, and gave up. Knowing him, he'd probably find her sex hair (without the actual sex to go with it) appealing. In her reflection, she noticed a splash of red across her front teeth, and grimaced. It hadn't just been an excuse after all.

She sat on the toilet as she pulled out bobby pins, and wetted her hair with water, until all the work she'd done was gone. She'd rehearsed a lot of sexy lines which were about as flat as her hair right now. She was tempted to even dump the heels.

Oh well, they'd be off soon enough.

Instead of anything a femme fatale in a film noir would say, she just cleared her throat to get his attention. When he turned, Liam dropped his controller, and outright gaped when she walked through the door. The little furry man on his screen was pummeled to death, but he didn't even notice. Seconds went by and he didn't say anything. She closed the door behind her and put one loose strand of hair behind her ear. She'd spent so much time trying to get her hair up, but also kind of sexy, and it was already falling down.

"Whoa, your clients got to see you in that? Lucky them," Liam said.

"No, I just picked this up on the way. Didn't you see?"

Liam shook his head. "You were wearin' a big trenchcoat like some pervert flasher. I only saw a bit of purple."

Of course. She smoothed her skirts and sat down.

"What are you playing?"

"I--uh, was playin' somethin'.I forgot--"

"You forgot?" She chuckled. "How do you forget?"

"You expect me to remember anythin' with you walkin' into the room like that? I mean c'mon. Not a lot of blood in my brain right now! Oh, now I remember. Dust! That's what it is, yeah. So uhhhh. You here for a game?" Liam said.

"Yes, actually--I mean, something like that. I'm here to see you, and I'm not here on business."

He raised his eyebrows. "Sounds interestin'! I'm totally--interested." She placed her hand on his. "Not for streaming this time."

"Oh, I just finished," Liam said.

"Good, because I wouldn't want you to be occupied, while we're busy," she said.

"We're?" Liam said.

"We're," Sophie said firmly.

"Come on, Liam. Don't tell me you don't know what I'm doing here. Isn't that what all this has lead up to?"

"Just---makin' sure," Liam said.

He had mirrors around his house like other people had posters or framed pictures. Every time he passed he'd wink or grin at his reflection. She hadn't put him down as Narcissus in the report for nothing.

She pulled his shirt towards her and tried to kiss him, but the surprise made him pull back, so she was managed only to plant a smooch on his chin.

"Damn, I'm really rusty," she said.

"Don't worry, it's cute," Liam said.

She undid the buttons on her black cocktail dress to reveal what she had underneath. She wasn't sure it actually had enough material to qualify as a lingerie. Even if it did, she'd want to put quotation marks on it, the 'so called lingerie.' Or to be more blunt, her I haven't gotten laid since I was in college, for the love of God please fix that outfit.

She tossed it aside; it landed on the camera.

The second time went much more smoothly. He kissed up her neck, until their lips met. She climbed right up into his lap, and ground her body tight against his. His hands lingered at her hips as he kissed down her throat.

"Crap, no condoms here, we gotta move this to the bedroom."

She pushed herself up, and took a moment to admire her handiwork. He had over twenty lipstick prints all over his neck and face, and even more on his lips. And she was sure he'd managed a few hickies--though she hoped they were below the neckline variety, or she'd have to wear a turtleneck tomorrow.

Sure, she could've sealed her lipstick, and not left marks all over her face, but what fun would that be?

She laughed as he lifted her up. It was such a giddy feeling, and his dazed expression finally switched to a big smile. He laid her down on his big bed, with yellow BONK covers and pillow cases.

"Hope you don't have an early mornin'. I'm settin' all those speed records when I'm runnin', but when it comes to the bedroom, I go all night."

"Prove it," Sophie said.

He unhooked her bra and tossed it aside. With a smirk, he buried his face into her breasts. Her breath caught at the warmth of his mouth engulfing her left nipple. She arched her back as his hands moved downward. With both his hands at the corners of her hips, he pulled her panties down slowly, enough to make her squirm. Fuck, she was wet. She couldn't even remember ever being this eager.

He slipped his fingers deep into her. "Damn, you feel amazin', Like liquid satin." He groaned. "And so warm, and wet."

"You sound about ready to come just doing that," she said.

"God, I could. I could totally come just like this."

"Don't, I need you to last as long as possible," she said.

"Anythin' you want, anythin' for you."

He kissed between her breasts. She'd expected him to go faster―hell she wanted him to go faster. Even with the way his hands were working her, it wasn't enough. He was only to her stomach as her legs began to tremble. Often his hands were covered with wraps, like a boxer. He said it was to get a better grip. But only with them off did she realize how big his hands really were.

She let out a little cry as he pulled his fingers out. She was so close. But seconds later, he buried his head between her thighs. She let out a gasp the second his tongue slipped against the slick folds of her labia, teasing all the way up to her clit. She clung to the sheets, trying to hold in the whimpers. She didn't remotely succeed. This was a guy who could vlog for five-plus hours. He knew how to use his tongue, and he had stamina in more than just running.

"D-dammit, Liam."

He chuckled against her. The vibrations felt amazing. He pushed his fingers back into her and began slowly thrusting in and out, teasing her closer. Her hips rocked back with each touch.

He didn't pull back when she gasped, wide-eyed in the first spark of orgasm. At her peak, he sucked her clit with such intensity that she felt herself slip straight into a second orgasm. Her legs shuddered at the rush of pleasure. The last vestiges of self-control fell along with it. All the stress of the day was forgotten in the pressure of his tongue and lips against her. All the reasons why she shouldn't be here, all the things she had to do, it was all gone in that moment. The only thing left was him, her and this intense, throbbing pleasure filling her.

At the very apex, she let out a scream worthy of one of his let's plays.

Only then did he pull back, with the biggest smirk she'd ever seen. He watched her as she rode out her climax, until it finally began to ebb and she could focus on something other than the sensations within her.

"Oh, god. Did I really scream?"

"Yeah, you did. You totally screamed my name, just like I promised. And it ain't even over yet." She heard the foil packet being unwrapped, but only vaguely. She hadn't felt this airy since that time she'd accidentally eaten her roommate's 'special brownies' in college. And that was saying something, considering she was sober at night for the first time in weeks.

"Ready for round two?" Liam said playfully. "Because I sure am."

"God, yes," Sophie said.

She pushed him onto his back and straddled him. He gaped, completely stunned as she bent down for a kiss. She couldn't just have bare skin without hickeys or kiss marks.

"What? I didn't become the enforcer for nothing, you know," Sophie said.

She slid down, until his cock completely inside her. It felt so wonderful to be filled up like this. She clenched deep in side, tight about him, until she could feel every vein and every inch of heat inside her.

"Whoa...you might wanna slow down if you want this to last."

"No, you're going to last as long as I say. Don't you dare stop until I say."

"God, you're so fuckin' hot."

She eased herself down until they were as close and tight as could be managed. Each thrust was hitting perfectly. She'd just gotten off the orgasm of her life, and it was already building into another even more intense one. He gripped tight around her as she rolled her hips.

"What, you goin' to hold me down?" Liam said.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea," Sophie said. She caught at his wrists and pinned him to the bed. She kept riding him, only this time they were even closer.

"Lemme have at least one hand so I can get you off some more," Liam said.

She released his left hand, and he put it right between her legs. She fucked him into those sheets, riding higher and higher on waves of pleasure with each thrust. God, he filled her up so good. So thick and amazing. She'd forgotten that life could feel this good. The incredible eagerness of the coming climax built up inside her, and when it crested, she screamed loud enough to rival Liam.

It was only in that post-coital haze that she ventured an abashed question.

"This is soundproof, right?"

"Yeah, I had to do the whole house, because I kept gettin' the police comin' thinkin' somebody got killed or some shit. It was so friggin' annoyin'. The neighbors won't hear a thing. I got the grand daddy of all soundproofin'."

"I'm not a screamer, honest," she said.

Liam raised his eyebrows. "Could've fooled me. Waaaitaminute, you're sayin' you're just a screamer with me?."

She pushed her head to the pillow to hide her blush. "Apparently," she said softly. It came out more than a little muffled. "Though I haven't been with anybody since college. My dry spell turned into a desert."

He didn't say anything. She peered over at him from over the pillow.

"You're smirking again, aren't you?"

"Oh yeah," Liam said.

She'd let him have that one. She'd had multiple screaming orgasms in less than an hour. Not even her vibrator could give her that. And she'd put quite a bit of her paycheck into her buying the highest quality one she could find once she realized she wasn't going to do any dating anytime soon with her schedule. He deserved every bit of bragging after tonight. Her seven year dry spell was broken, and how. She'd almost say that she should've given in to the urge to fuck him way back then, playing video games in the first interview, but the waiting had made the actual act utterly delicious.

"Hey, why don't you stay the night? I could wake you up," he said.

"You're very persuasive, Mr. Dempsey," she said.

"I could...make you breakfast," Liam said. "Or you could be breakfast."

"Even more persuasive," she said. "What do you have planned, burnt eggs or fast food breakfast?"

"Hey now, everyone can manage an egg and some bacon. It ain't that hard. Me, on the other hand..."

He turned over, but shifted until he was spooned behind her. Even during college, Sophie hadn't been much for sharing beds. She always had exams to study late for, she didn't want anyone distracting Sophie from her morning classes.

How the mighty had fallen. Here was Stone Cold Pauling, the veritable ice queen, cuddling away. Sharing beds. Bedded down with a former client who still was contracted under the company she worked for.

And she loved every minute of it. She even nestled in deeper against him.

I could have this every day, maybe, Sophie thought to herself. She pushed the thought down, back past the drowsiness, into dreams. A place where thoughts like that belonged.

*

She'd left her so-called dress in a tangled heap on the floor. Wearing this out in daylight might as well scream Guess who just had sex?! to every construction worker and mother passing by.

To say nothing of the series of hickeys. If there was a contest, she'd win, considering his whole torso was kiss prints and hickeys, but he'd still left a few good ones on her, and in very visible places at that.

She bent down and pulled up her lacy, impractical, seducing panties and slipped them on. Her bra was nowhere to be seen. She bent down and pulled out his slightly rumpled red shirt with BONK, his favorite sports drink based on his favorite video game.

He was going to love this. She couldn't help but smile at the thought of how he'd look. Amazed? Turned on? She'd sure get a smile out of it. And if Liam Dempsey's smiles could've been bottled, she'd be a millionaire, and the world would be a very different place. Happier, and with far more hope.

She slipped it on, breathing in a strong scent of cologne--probably Axe body spray.

She opened up the cupboard, only to find at least twenty new toothbrushes. She pulled out one with a purple grip, and sat it inside the cupboard, right next to his, when she was done.

Liam let out a low whistle. "---Good mornin' gorgeous. Daaaaamn. Is this an early birthday present? Because, holy shit. I feel like Christmas came early."

He embraced her from the back. His hands worked underneath the lacy panties, until they were onto the floor.

"Need some coffee?" she said.

Liam slipped his arms about her waist. The first kiss was at her forehead, then to her cheeks. "Need some Vitamin You first."

His mouth tasted like he'd gargled the entire bottle of Listerine. She wouldn't be surprised if he did; Liam always went overboard.

"You hungry? I was goin' to start, but I didn't want the eggs to get rubbery."

"Let me make some coffee first," she said.

For one of his dare videos, Liam had gotten a cappucino machine. Being that it was Liam, it was no surprise that the only coffee that ever passed his lips was filled with so much sugar and syrup that it might as well be classified as a liquid candy bar.

She sipped at her coffee.

"You made my coffee perfect," Liam said. "You should be like--an honorary Barista!"

"You went on and on about that cute Barista, and how she made your coffee just right."

What she didn't mention was that she'd paused the video, and had to rewind several times due to how fast he talked, so she could write it down. She hadn't even had the excuse of being drunk that time. She'd taken notes with the plan of making the best coffee imaginable.

Why? To push any baristas and chicken joint girls out of his mind? Surely not. She just wanted to make a decent cup of coffee.

"And now I can go about the cutest coffee girl ever--you!" Liam said.

"Liam, why are there twenty toothbrushes under the sink? I wasn't peeping, by the way. I had to replace the toilet paper roll."

"Oh, you must've missed that one. Markiplier, Jack and I were buildin' stuff out of toothbrushes for charity. At one point we started fencin' with them, and one of them pulled out a vibratin' one--it was a blast."

"It sounds like it. I'll have to search out that one," she said.

Even though she'd made a huge dent in the last weeks' uploads over the past few nights, he still uploaded dozens a week. At this point, she wouldn't rule out him having some kind of time pausing magic artifact. It seemed like the only way he could possibly do that much in one day.

"I gotta check this stream. Just gimme a---Hey, da fuck? It ain't supposed to be this many hours long?"

"This many?" Sophie said. "Oh no...Oh, oh no. You said it was off!"

"I thought it was!"

Sophie took several long breaths as she tried not to hyperventilate. She would be known as Sophie the screamer. Her coworkers would smirk as she walked by. She'd never get another decent job again, not when any client could pull up her quasi-sex tape.

"Besides, they probably didn't see or hear anythin', most of the dirtier stuff was many rooms away. Lemme just look through it. Oh uh...."

"It caught everything, didn't it?"

"Everythin' up until you threw your dress on it," Liam said.

He went through the chat. Many of them were just a strange, somewhat creepy emoticon who was apparently called Lenny. Many other smilies didn't have names, but this one, who looked like he would come out of the screen and give bad come ons and get handsy by sheer force of will and innuendo.

He reminded her a lot of Liam, actually.

Liam sped through the video. She flinched as she saw his shirt go off, and the second of her bare back and bra straps before her dress blocked out the view. People had stayed in the chat and listened to them fucking. Her face flushed bright red.

"Yeah, about that. Turns out the soundproofin' doesn't work if you leave the door open. Well, think of it this way, we don't got to leak a sex tape for popularity!" Liam said. He made finger guns, and smiled, as if he could shoot her with the force of his wit. She didn't smile back.

"Look, it was a pretty late stream. Only maybe, a few mill saw them, tops. I'll take it down and edit it, and then post it on youtube. People fuck all the day, no big deal. Okay, it was a damn big deal, a real, great big deal, but you know what I mean."

She sat down and massaged the bridge of her nose. Her mind was reeling. If she had ideas of being a politician, then this could ruin her. She hadn't, but Sophie always wanted to keep her options open.

And what if her boss found out that she'd caused a scandal? A sex tape could wreck all her plans of being anything more than a mockery. And it could completely close out any business that deemed itself "family friendly" from getting anywhere near her.

"Soph, Soph, you okay?"

Well, she thought. She had changed her life like the takeout fortune cookie told her.

"I don't even talk about sex with my family or friends. And now millions of people heard us having sex. Millions. What if my mother watched that video? She knows I've been working on something--she could randomly Google me and find it!"

"Awesome sex, multiple times, even. If it makes you feel better, tons of girls say you're super lucky. I totally agree," Liam said.

"How can you be so calm about this?"

"Soph, it's just sex. Awesome sex, but still just sex. you ain't goin' to be put through the wringer, I mean come on. Nobody will even care!"

"Oh, really? What about the people who listen to us the whole time?" She motioned to the camera, his screen, the twitch chat full of fans who now knew more than anyone close to her ever had.

But, that wasn't surprising. She didn't have anyone close to her anymore.

"Sophie, seriously, it ain't anythin'."

She could barely breathe. Sophie put her head between her knees. Everything was dissipating before her eyes. Her future working under the Administrator, her future in general, her relationships. What if the news got it? What if it leaked and Sophie the Screamer followed her the entire life?

What if nobody remembered her as a businesswoman with a MBA from Harvard who worked under the Administrator herself, but simply for who she'd fucked? She'd never hit any list, and only would go down in infamy.

"Look, I can't deal with this. Last night was fun, but I'm out."

She pulled off his shirt and went to get her things. Her chest felt like there was a vice slowly closing over her ribs.

"Wait, Sophie! This ain't nothin'. I'm goin' to pull it right away. I'll tell the fans not to talk about it and not reup parts of the stream. It don't got to be like this!"

His voice grew desperate. Pleading. The vice about her ribs went tighter. But she didn't get the name the execution, the leader of the firing squad for being merciful.

"Goodbye, Liam. Or, I guess I should call you Scout now, huh?" She refused to dignify his username with lewd numbers.

"Look, it's just a little bump. A total accident, I promise. Next time I'll make sure the camera is off---"

"There won't be a next time," she said.

The look on his face was like a punch to the gut. His self-assurance, his swagger and post-coital glow all faded.

"Sophie..." There was so much emotion in that one word. No one had ever looked at her like this, smiled at her.

"This was a mistake," she said. "And I'm sorry."

He said nothing as she went back to the room and got her dress, everything she'd worked so hard.

*

It was only three, and already Sophie was contemplating the consequences of a flask full of vodka at work. She had steeled herself for bad jokes, the looks from her coworkers, the laughter. But they never came, even as she went through the day a tense state. All the good a night of mind-blowing sex had done to her was fading in this mood-ruiner of the stream. The accidental sex tape.

Even if he had millions watching each night, he didn't draw much paparazzi. They only bothered the royalty, the elite, and the celeberities, and apparently 'professional gamers' didn't draw their eye. Woman consensually fucks man didn't exactly make the newspapers.

Online, it might be a different story, but for now, she was a little safer, at least. As nothing happened, the regrets set in. The best sex of her life, the guy who made her feel things she couldn't even bring herself to talk about, and here she was throwing it away.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. It was one thing to be worried, but it was another to end everything.

The humiliation, the sinking reality that she'd just torpedoed this beginning of something she didn't want to be a one-night stand anymore, all of her denial and protestations were just a smokescreen. He wasn't remotely out of her system. Now that she'd gotten a taste, all she wanted was more. Now the only place she wanted to be was on his couch, or in his bed, and waiting out the potential storm there, with his arms around her.

Good going, Sophie. You ran away again. Aren't you a strong and independent woman now, that you've pushed away all the people who cared about you because you were scared of rejection? I hope you like your friends Tequila, Vodka, Gin, Wine and Rum, because they're all you ever have. Nobody else ever tried to stay close to you. He was the one who fought past the ice and the walls, and you blew it.

Tonight was definitely a Tequila night. With luck, she'd drink so much she forgot everything that happened in the past twenty-four hours.

She googled her name, and got no hits on a sex tape yet. She tried searching for him, glad to see that famous youtuber didn't make papers like TMZ or CelebGossip, or god forbid, PerezHilton.

One new source came up on top of the recent news of Liam's last celebrity stream. Her eye began to twitch as she saw the links.

She squinted at the sole piece that came up, straight from Gawker of all places. Of course Gawker media would fucking run her accidental half-sex tape. For not the first time, she mentally cursed, and wished that the Administrator had taken over the Gawker network, instead of turning it aside as 'useless trash.'

At least then she could've put a gag order in, or run the site to the ground with new incomprehensible site "updates" which made everything so hard to use that people left. The Administrator had done the same to De.icio.us just because the url offended her.

She could talk about libel, or send lawyers their way...but what was the use? It wasn't as if she were married, as if this were a giant cheating scandal. Two unmarried adults engaging in consensual behavior wasn't exactly story of the year, but that didn't stop Gawker from digging themselves deeper.

She scanned through the comments. Most were people noting how little they cared, with a few people saying their dreams had come true, and again with the nautical phrases. She couldn't quite fathom how her getting laid was making their dreams come true.

*

It'd been a week of enough alcohol that she was surprised a hospital visit hadn't happened somewhere along the way. Every morning she'd woken up with hangover that had almost been a comfort. Finally her head reflected how she felt inside.

But tonight, her body was stubborn. Five shots of Tequila, and she was still conscious. She had told herself that this really was the end, that she wouldn't check the channel. Her work was over, she fucked it up to hell, and she wasn't going back. Memories of the last night, how she'd freaked out and ran, mixed with the feel of his lips on her skin. She'd cringed when she saw his videos recommended to her email address.

She couldn't quite bring herself to unsubscribe. It would be too final.

It hadn't even been a week, but she found herself signing back into Youtube, and the other social media accounts she'd made for this job.

Tequila was persuasive.

"Technically, this could be considered work," she told herself.

On some planet, and at some point in the past. And technically it could be considered following around someone who wasn't quite an ex, because what they had didn't quite count as dates. She should be more drunk for this, Sophie thought. Much, much more drunk.

She poured herself a glass of wine and took a sip, and then a few more, because this level of stupid behavior needed a better excuse than buzzed, fucked up and lonely, and full of the knowledge that it was her own damn fault she was in this situation. She figured the Tequila could have some company in slowly destroying her liver.

All this alcohol, and the events of last night still kept turning over in her mind. She'd freaked, she'd pushed away the only person who was her 3AM, the only person who had ever been her 3AM. He was her 3PM, the one who when she drunkenly called him came to her aid, posting videos and checking up on her.

Beneath each video were a list of social media. She'd already gone through some, though the last one she had snubbed, simply because the name galled at her. Every time she saw the world tumblr she wanted to correct it, and add the missing e. She minimized an annoying window hat urged her to get an account, and began to scroll through the blog. Of all the social media sites, she could at least somewhat understand, but this one seemed to be mostly made up of other people's content. Gifs of his videos. With each one he added a caption of his own, even if it was just "woooo! Tahnks!"

She scrolled down, well aware that she might scroll right into something that even Tequila couldn't erase. This was my twitter today. There was a video of Liam scrolling down his feed. Dozens of people had sent him a gif of two men giddily holding a cake with congrats on the sex across it in blue lettering.

After a few seconds of glancing at the screenshot, and just how many people knew about the tape, she emptied her shot glass.

She was just about to shut down her laptop when a hint of black caught her eye. She scrolled down, only to stare at the screen for several moments. It took her a moment to realize with the art style that she was looking at her own face. In the art, he was kissing her cheek, while she blushed.

OMG I ship it otp to end all otps.

His caption was Me too.

"I still have no idea what this has to do with ships," she said.

Liam&Sophie. The video caption said clipped from his vlogs, all the LiSo. My only OTP to go canon..

this is g8. tho it should be soli because she's a total top.

"Oh my God, too much information, Liam!"

She checked the date. Six hours ago. He didn't hate her after all. In fact, she was greeted with pictures of her face, something odd, a touch of fame as she'd brushed close to him.

A little X showed the source of a video below the line of GIFs. She clicked it, and the video started to play.

"So, I met a girl. Okay, I met tons of girls, but you ever had that wa-pow moment, where it's different? She's comin' back soon, in fact I convinced her to play some games with me. It's super cute, so I bet you all will love it."

"So, I looked up this girl and she is in-cre-di-ble. Like she saved a whole place with a fire and stuff?
And I called this guy Bidwell by accident and he told me a bunch more. Because what can I say, I gotta make sure she wasn't lyin' and stuff. She's legit, the real thing. I hope she comes back--because I was an idiot and probably was distracted by her eyes...and the way her glasses falls down her nose, and she pushes it up with her finger.. He looked so tender.

"Met Sophie again! We went out skateboardin', and man is she adorable. We grabbed some pizzas, and talked and stuff. It sort of felt like a date! Though technically, it wasn't. But one of these days, I'm goin' to get her to go out with me."

He flexed at the screen. He made some sort of duck lip kissy face, like teenagers did. She couldn't tell if he was being silly, or not.

There were shots of their red short bouncy castle day, and then there he was in that bizarre prep get up. She pressed the side of her fist to her mouth, but the laughter still came.

"Yeah, I know, I want to punch myself in the face too, but I gotta fancy it up a little." He smoothed back his hair. "When you meet the one, the one who makes you wanna change up everythin', then puttin' on argyle and lookin' like some rich fuck boarding school boy ain't nothin'. All I can think is the swag shirts--while awesome--just ain't goin' to cut it. So, I asked this guy my ma knows. He taught me all about soup spoons. I keep thinkin' of ways to put it into conversation."

She couldn't fathom what made him think she'd want a guy like that.

"Yeah, some of you might've seen some things, and heard some things, but could you please keep it on the down low? I didn't mean to fuck up."

"It's weird, I can't stop thinkin' about that girl. She's just...friggin' amazin'. The way her glasses slip down just so, the way she can read and spell and stuff, the way she smells. Ugh, she's so cute! Did I mention that? Think I did but it bears repeatin'. I can't even get off to porn anymore, because none of it is even half as good as just spendin' a few seconds with her. I literally deleted all the porn off my computer. It's renderin' like a dream now, though it kind of felt like sayin' goodbye to an old friend.

He fell back to the couch. "So, she's kinda bolted now, but I'm goin' to figure out a way to get her back. Because, sometimes things change, like lightning and suddenly everythin' you wanted isn't want you wanted anymore. I always thought people were just fuckin' with me when they said things like that, like oh, that'd never happen to me, but it did. Pally, I am a complete fool, and I'd do it all again just to spend a few minutes with her. I would, I really would."


The next were a few shots of them together at the skating park, them laughing, with Liam's talks about her layered over them.

She's back!I thought she was really pissed at me, but she came over and we―we played video games."

He couldn't stop smiling.

She couldn't remember ever seeing herself look that happy. It felt like watching another person. Even in those moments it had felt incredible--like something from a dream.

She pursed her mouth. Leave it to Liam to tell the world everything. Being friends with him--let alone lovers--meant every single moment he could would be broadcast to the entire world. It would be like knowingly walking into The Truman Show and asking for an audition.

And yet, she couldn't help but smile. Nobody in her company had ever appreciated what she'd done back then--and did every day.

Tell the ones you love what they mean to you.

It was 3AM, and there was only one person she really wanted to talk to.

She searched through her address book, until she found the D's. She held her thumb for a moment longer than necessary as the ringing icon came up. There were so many possibilities: He would wake up angry, he would ignore the phone call and by the time daylight was back this new recklessness would give in to her usual self.

"Sophie! Is somethin' wrong? Just tell me and I'll do--anythin'. A stream, I'll run right there--"

"....What the hell, Liam. I was a complete mess and here you are trying to cheer me up?"

"Of course I'm goin' to be worried. It's 3AM."

"I know.... Listen, I fucked up," she said.

"Are you okay? I-I'll be right there, run right over--"

"No, it's not anything like that. ...You weren't a mistake then. I just freaked out. I tried to push you away. I always do this." She started to hiccup. "I'm sorry we keep having this conversation, especially as I'm supposed to be the professional one. But something about you keeps making me be unprofessional. You just keep getting under my skin. I think it's going to just be a one night stand and it isn't, I knew it wasn't going to be, but I keep just keep messing up..."

"So you're drunk dialin' me and checkin' up on me online," Liam said.

"You can tell I'm watching your videos?"

"I can when you go and like all the stuff I reblog on tumblr," Liam said.

She'd totally forgotten that. Thanks, Tequila. She tried to check her phone, only to remember that she couldn't multitask.

"I'm startin' to think you actually are sweet on me," Liam said.

"I thought that night would've given you a clue. I don't sleep with people thoughtlessly," she said dryly.

"Well yeah, but then you ran out. Kinda gettin' mixed messages here," Liam said.

"Look... It's...."

She closed her eyes. Already the room felt dizzy. Maybe that wine chaser for those rounds of Tequila wasn't such a great idea after all.

"I... All this time I told myself I was doing this for myself, for my job, but I don't think it's that at all. I just get freaked out sometimes and run away. I always told myself I was prioritizing my work...but that's a lie. I run because it's safer. No one can push me away if I push them away first. Until I met you, I really bought into this lie that I was just..."

She opened her mouth, but no words came. She'd never spoke any of these aloud. She'd barely allowed herself to face them.

"I was barely living. Like a zombie going through my life and promising that getting on a list would make me happy, getting recognition from my boss would make me happy. I put more and more of myself into this work. I gave the best years of my life to this work...and I'm starting to realize that I'm never going to get anything back out of it. I'm never going to be promoted, I'm never going to get on the Fortune list--I'm realizing that I'm kind of a wreck, and all I want to do is push you away because you saw me at my messiest, and yet....all I want to do is be back there again."

"I keep telling myself it meant nothing and that I was just trying to scratch an itch, but I had so much fun. All I can think is I want to do it again. And not just fucking, jumping around in bouncy castle, or playing video games, or eating pizza. I want to do all of that again, though probably not at once."

When she was working, she could tell herself it would all be worth it in the end. The more hours put in, the more she could ignore the gaping unease as she drifted from everyone--family, friends, even acquaintances. The dark circles that she had to cover up with makeup every morning, the fact that she practically had to call a vacation day to do her laundry with hours that more and more seemed like an endless hamster wheel.

"Can we...maybe...just be..."

"Oh no, not the f-word," he said.

"F word?"

"You wanna just be friends," Liam said flatly. "It's been nice, but you need a shoulder to cry on, not a boyfriend. Right?"

"Do you live in some weird world where people can't be friends and da....do whatever we were doing? Do you automatically hate everyone you date or something?" She said.

"I ain't dated too many people before you. Actually, you're the first one I stayed with past the night. Except I don't even know if we're really datin' or somethin' else entirely," he said.

"What I was saying was...Could you just be patient with me? I feel like I atrophied even more when it comes to people, and all I want to do when I feel awkward is bury myself in something I'm good at--like work. Then I'm not second-guessing myself and thinking I said something stupid, and that little to-do list in my head isn't ticking like a clock reminding me that I could be doing something useful."

"I'm real fast. You should see my times vids. You can't run away, because I'm goin' to catch you," Liam said.

She couldn't help but chuckle. "Liam... Ever since I didn't make the list, and even though what you said was nice, it doesn't change the fact that I...."

That she'd let her friends go for an office job and no hope of anything more. That she'd run away from every meaningful relationship and buried herself so deep that she didn't even know how unhappy she'd been. That everything she couldn't make on her checklist felt like a thorn deep under her skin. That now she was realizing that every firing, every job well done only made her boss more determined to keep her from ever getting acclaim, to shunt her down like a cog, a nameless foundation of the company.

All her dreams of working for The Administrator and making a name for herself had been so, so naive. The moment she ever gained notoriety and got articles about her, she'd be on the other side of the firing squad and be blackballed so fast. She was caught in a push and pull of a title she wasn't even sure she wanted any longer.

"Sophie? You still there?" Liam said.

"...I'm just really confused about what I want now. Except that I want you. I know that much is true. I was stupid, completely stupid, and I freaked out completely. I've been unprofessional and awful to you at times. I tried to convince myself it didn't mean what it did, that it I hope...you won't hold what I said and did then against me, that you'll..." She bit her lip. "That you'll forgive me. But if you don't want to...then I understand."

"Are you kiddin'? Of course I won't. I missed you somethin' fierce. I've been mopin' around, couldn't even play video games properly. Burned through all my sick day videos. Look, You know how serious I am? I deleted all my porn."

"I heard," she said.

"You watched my vlogs!"

"I just can't stay away," she said.

She shifted the phone. "I'm glad. I mean..." she cleared her throat. "I'm also kind of drunk, and it's three AM, so I'm probably not making annny kind of sense here."

"Hey, you up to gettin' over here? Not for sexy times, you're too sauced for that. Hell, I'll pick you up, I don't want you drivin'. I just wanna wake up with you."

Those weeks ago when he hit on her within seconds of her attempted interview, she never wouldn't thought this could happen. She'd been so completely off about him.

"Yeah. I'd like that," she said.

She gathered up an overnight bag of clothes. She already had a toothbrush waiting for her. Twenty, in fact. She'd almost dozed off on the couch when she heard the knock. When she got up and opened the door, there was such a palatable relief.

I'm not alone anymore.

There was such a tender expression as he pulled her into a hug. He brushed his hands through her hair. She buried her face against his chest. Even the scent of Axe had turned sweet to her. It now reminded her of him, not tryhard teenage boys.

"Sophie," he said huskily. "I missed you so much. Come on back where you belong."

I'm already here, she thought.

*

She woke up with the sound of his heartbeat against her ear. He shifted just slightly and nuzzled into her. Even the closeness couldn't drown out the persistent ache in her head. God, she was afraid of what her liver must look like these days.

Because that was the closest she got to having a hobby, having happiness or dealing with her problems. Enough red wine to leave her fuzzy in the mornings, and dealing with a hangover until lunch.

It wasn't New Year's yet, but she made a resolution. No more drowning her problems in work, and she sure as hell wasn't going to drown them in alcohol. She was always avoiding conversations, and making herself feel useful by staying up late and taking on extra work.

"I got some orange juice," Liam said. "Good for hangovers. Peanut butter, too. Especially those Reeces cups. Y'know, the peanut butter type. Oh, and I got a some stuff on hand. I can make a mean Hair of the Dog."

She pushed her glasses up. She hadn't dared look at a mirror. She didn't take her makeup off last night.

"Drape that mirror while I go by, would you? I'm half afraid I'd crack the mirrors at this point. God, I have to look scary."

"I'll drape my arm over you instead. You better not think of kickin' it. I'll go get some Phoenix Down or Necromancy if I have to. Go punch death out until you come back to me."

"My Orpheus in a swag shirt, reeking of Axe body spray. You probably play dubstep at the gods of the underworld until they're so annoyed, they stop. Just don't look back, and we'll be fine," she said.

Liam smirked. "More like Tom Jones, but you got it. You goin' to call in sick?"

The thought of calling in sick when she wasn't had never even occurred to her. While in her teen years, her fellow classmates had started a black market of coughing in jars in hopes to get as many days off as possible, she had made the trek even if she could barely stand.

"A whole day to myself..." she said.

"We couldn't go out. The Administrator would know if I lied to her immediately. I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't bug your apartment. And you couldn't vlog too much about me. She might find out."

"Babe, your boss sounds intense, kind of like a stalker."

"She has the world by the balls. I wanted to be her one day, and plant my bootprint across the back of the world, just like she did," Sophie said. She took a sip of orange juice. It tasted bitter and tangy in her mouth.

"That's hot. Just lemme put this to render. I try to never let a day go by. You never know. Maybe someone was really down, and this is what brought them up again. That's what I'm here for, to be incredibly handsome, and make people laugh. Well, that and bein' awesome," he said.

"Of course, we can't forget that," she said, and chuckled to herself.

She curled her knees to her chest and watched him. He drummed his fingers on the table. The computer was humming louder now.

"Back in the day, my computer was shit. It used to take me all friggin' day to render one little thing. It'd make sounds like it was dyin' every time I worked on a video. And editin', oh my god! It took me so long to pick up that crap. But, I like how it turns out now. I guess I picked up some stuff over the years," he said.

"Why didn't you just hire someone to do the editing for you? You have enough money," she said.

"Nah, I like hands on approach. I don't call in anybody unless I have to."

Stripped down to nothing but a pair of his smallest gym shorts and a borrowed shirt, she rested back on the couch.

"We could spend the day in bed," Liam said suggestively.

"Nothing sexier than me barfing all over you mid-coitus," she said.

"Okay, maybe after the hangover blues," he said.

"How did you know when you'd found the right path in your life?" She said suddenly.

"Babe, you're implyin' I think about this shit. I don't! So, my life was in the crapper. I just got out of prison--robbery, if you're wonderin', well with some assault and battery. I didn't have anythin' goin' on, so I just started puttin' videos online. Just for fun! This was way before Vine was a thing and Youtube was way new. And it exploded. I kept on gettin' people want me to smack my ass while doin' aerobics and scream at video games. So, I made some fuckin' lemonade of my life. I finally got my shit together, I got my G.E.D while I was stuck tin the clink, and I ain't never goin' back to feelin' like I got nowhere to go."

"And, me..." She began. She didn't finish the sentence.

"Because I felt different around you than anybody else. Because things like deletin' my porn and Tinder account were nothin'. It wasn't a chore or nothin', because I'd get to do somethin' way better: be near you."

Because for the first time she realized what she had missing. Like a defibrillator, a shock right to the heart which had startled her awake. Because for the first time, she couldn't be professional, because he'd already gotten too deep under her skin.

He paused the game and set the controller aside.

"I'm goin' to have to do some screamin', so you probably don't wanna be layin' in here. At least not until you got a nap or somethin'," he said. He leaned down to kiss her forehead.

"Think you can hold off on the screaming and come sleep with me? I mean sleep sleep, not..."

"Not sleep with you, just sleep with you," Liam said. He couldn't help but grin.

"Exactly," Sophie said.

"I got a ton of hours on this, anyways. Might as well just leave it to work," he said.

He put his arms about her waist. It fit so well, his heartbeat and hers. His breath and hers. Sure, she'd had boyfriends, and a few girlfriends too, but it'd never been like this. Curled up with him, hungover and playing hooky. There was nowhere she'd rather be.

*

She woke a few hours later, with a much clearer head. Each room he recorded in was boarded off and completely soundproof.

She dug in her purse for some makeup removing wipes. It was pretty early on in the relationship--the word still made her start--to be going this naked, but he'd already seen her post-hangover, pre-hangover, been drunk dialed multiple times and been dumped right after sex, she figured he could handle seeing her without makeup.

"Hey, you're up again. Feelin' any better?"

"Yeah," she said.

She buried her face into the neck band of the shirt. She really needed a shower.

"You look like you're goin' to keel over again," Liam said.

He brushed her hair back and gave her a concerned once-over.

"Was the hangover that bad?"

"It's getting better," she said.

He pulled the red shirt open at the neck and peered in.

"Did you think my boobs were hungover?" she said.

"You never know! I had to make sure all of you was okay," Liam said.

She rolled her eyes and leaned back on the bed.

Her stomach let out a petulant grumble.

"I got bacon in the fridge, if you want some. I can put it in the microwave. Even I can manage that," Liam said.

"That sounds wonderful. But not the microwave. I'll cook it on the stove," she said.

"Be my guest," he said. He started to hum the Disney tune.

She pulled out a pan from the lowest cupboard.

"You think some eggs could be in the picture, too?" Liam said hopefully.

"If you have them, I'll cook them," she said.

"All right!" Liam pulled them out and placed them on the counter.

"You're a champion sleeper. I bet you went a good twelve hours without even tryin'. They should give you award. Well, one of the reasons why," Liam said.

"I've been going on just a few hours of sleep with nothing but massive amounts of coffee to keep me up for...a very, very long time."

"You wanna sleep in the rest of the day?" Liam said.

She squinted at the clock. 8PM. Talk about sleeping the day away. So much for a memorable one day off a year.

Then again, this was what she needed.

The bacon sizzled in the pan as she turned it on low. She cracked the eggs. A double yolk oozed over the pan.

"Are you seriously trying to get me to sleep with you without having sex with me again?"

"Please, they invented that award with me in mind," Liam said.

"Besides, it's kind of nice. I mean, don't get me wrong, I like sex, but I like you. I like spendin' time with you and crap."

She lifted her eyebrows. How romantic. Still, his bluntness was refreshing.

She didn't mean to devour her food, but only at the first bite did she realize just how hungry she was. She couldn't savor or wait. Mentally, she hoped she hadn't unseated the balance. But the nausea didn't return.

"So, you wanna..."

She left the plates in the sink. "Yeah."

He turned off the system and they crawled under the covers. No marathon sex this time. Just warmth and her nestled against him. It wasn't just the hangover she was sleeping off, but years of destroying everything in her life in the name of progress.

Years of destroying herself for the chance that a future her would get some glory. Years of running away. It all stopped now.

*

She turned, blinking into the green light of his alarm clock. 11:09.

She stretched, slightly groggy as he stirred next to her.

"In an hour I could actually say 'good morning' but for now, I gotta settle for 'good evening...' or actually 'good night.' Something like that. Hey, it's almost 11:11. Get ready to make a wish," Liam said.

"A wish?"

"You don't know about 11:11? Like wishin' on a shootin' star, blowin' out birthday candles, or throwin' a lucky penny, except it comes around twice a day."

Fortune list was out, and she wasn't even sure she wanted this anymore. A cutthroat business world, a boss who would sabotage her at every turn. What could she do when everything she wanted turned out to be a lie, and not what she wanted at all? Talk about a mid-life crisis. Twenty-five, and as jaded as they came.

He closed his eyes and kept mouthing the words.

This, she thought. She could figure out her job in other days as it neared towards midnight. But for now, without even believing, a wish agnostic, from the depths of her heart she wanted this to continue.

Her little slant of light in her life.

She pulled on his shirt.

"Hey..."

It was gentler, this time. Each kiss lingered long, to savor the moment, instead of a desperation.

"My wish is--"

"Shh, you can't tell it, or it won't come true," he said.

It's already come true. And now, all I have to do is stop fucking it up.

"The hangover's all gone now," she said softly.

"Yeah, I told you. You just needed to sleep it off."

She rested her palm on his chest. "Are you down for another kind of sleeping?"

"Babe, I'm always down to fuck. Hell, it's more like I'm always down for you. You know that. Now, 'c'mere. I'll make you feel better," he said.

He pushed his fingers deep into her. She whimpered as he brushed her clit with the pad of his thumb. All the while, he kissed her neck, and whispered soft things to her.

You're beautiful--so damn beautiful. Oh, Soph.

It wasn't hungry, aggressive and slightly awkward, with that newness of lips meeting and trying to fit together, like the first time. Tonight, it was the kind of gentleness she'd never had in her life, and certainly never thought someone like Liam Dempsey, king of the Youtube Screamers and swag shirts was capable of.

He pulled his fingers out, only to fill her up more. Side to side, face to face, his time, they kissed every moment they could. Even as he he moved in her, and little moans fluttered in her throat, she couldn't stop kissing him, even when it left her breathless.

There wasn't banter, just their mouths tight together, moans between the brush of his tongue against her lips.

And when they finished, it was warm and wonderfully calm. She lay curled in his arms as he played with her hair and knew. I just made love, she thought. She hadn't even liked the word a few years ago. But now that she had it, she had to admit that the world was onto something. The mere fact that she could have break-the-bed feral sex and lovemaking in the same relationship was incredible. Hell, the fact that she could manage to relax for whole hours was incredible.

"That was amazing. Wow, I loved that," Sophie said.

"...Wait, what did you say?"

Her eyes widened as it sank in what she'd just said. It had just tumbled out in the perfect post-coital exhaustion. Even when she'd said I love that she'd meant she loved him.

Maybe he'd heard her wrong, or maybe he'd just heard right through everything that had been staring her right in the face.

"I...."

"Wait, is this just one of those 'sex made me do it' moments and you're just goin' to cut and run again?"

Her heart was beating so fast, but for once, she didn't feel like running.

"Liam..."

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "I know how this goes. You run off, then you drunk dial me later on. You wanna push me away, then you wanna come back, but only if I don't come too close. I've seen this song and dance all before, Sophie."

"Liam," she said, more sharply this time.

"What? I ain't tryin' to be mean, but you did all that before, right down to the drunk-
dialin' and freakin' out about girls."

It wasn't a pretty picture, but Liam had actually been quite forgiving, considering he'd left out just how bad things had gotten in his summary.

"I know I've been a little bit of a mess. Okay, a lot of a mess. But, I'm not going to run away again. Liam, you taught me how to have fun again, how to feel alive and how to scream at video games." She couldn't help but chuckle at this part. "You're not just my boyfriend--"

"Boyfriend?" Liam said eagerly. "You really think of me as your guy?"

"Of course, what did you think all this was?"

"Half the time I don't know. You say we're not dating, then we end up in bed and then get jealous, then you don't want me around. I wanna be your boyfriend so bad, but I don't wanna scare you away again," Liam said.

"Like I was saying, you aren't just my boyfriend, you're my best friend."

She left out that he was her only friend. That sounded a little too pathetic.

She took his hand in hers, and squeezed it.

"I leave work every day full of things I'm going to tell you. I don't know how I even made it back then, pushing myself to the brink constantly and being so naive to throw away so much of my life for a boss which was never going to promote me. I don't want to run away anymore. I want to run right here, fuck you senseless and then play video games after a nap."

"So, I can start? I don't have to pull away anymore? I don't gotta hold it all in?"

"Liam, if I let you go full throttle, you'd be running screaming through the streets naked, get my name tattooed on your ass, and end up in jail again before the day was over."

He burst out laughing. "That―that is comedy gold. Wish I could be filmin' now, because this is somethin' for the ages."

"We already had an almost sex tape, we don't need to tape the afterglow," she said.

He wrapped his arms about her,and nuzzled close, until they were forehead to forehead.

"If you wanna still take it slow, I'll do it. But, while we're confessin' stuff, I got some, too. Before you, okay, I was awesome, but I was also kind of a jerk sometimes," Liam said.

"That's putting it mildly," She said.

"I never hung around, and I never even had a real girlfriend until you. I didn't even want one. But meeting you was like...for the first time, I felt like I had to up my game or you wouldn't even give me a second look. You're just so brilliant and beautiful and incredible. I can't even imagine to ever goin' back to pickin' up girls at chicken joints and forgettin' their names before the night was over. I didn't even know it was possible to be this happy. How did I ever miss somethin' like this? It's like the universe was holding out on me all this time."

"I guess we both had a lot to learn," Sophie said.

He entwined his fingers in hers. "Guess it's time to get a lovin' G.E.D, because I sure as hell didn't learn that shit in school."

She laughed. They curled up in that post-coital haze of closeness and wonderful feelings. She'd never slept so well before. She never knew little moments like eating breakfast food at almost midnight and crawling into bed together could be so fulfilling.

*

The alarm on her phone chirped like birdsong. Sophie hopped out of bed and pulled on her clothes. At this rate, she should just leave some here.

Liam let out a groan and reached for her. Sophie stepped just out of reach.

"I'm afraid this will be the last one for a while. I've got another business trip for the week," she said.

"Aw, man. Really?" Liam said. He pulled the covers up to about his chin. "That sucks."

"It's just a weekend. We could---text, I guess. Or Skype. Whatever people in those long-distance relationships do. But only a little, I'll be meeting some pretty important businessmen."

"Sendin' selfie time? I think it's sendin' selfie time!"

"Keep them safe for work," she said.

"Soph, no picture of me is ever safe for work. Get a look at me and all your coworkers are goin' to be jealous, and thinkin' 'hey, who is that incredibly handsome man? It sure is a shame he's taken'--taken by the best girl ever, that is!"

"I'm sure Bidwell will be heartbroken," she said.

"If he's the black haired dude I called up? I bet he totally is."

Well, that'd explain why he didn't quit working for Saxton Hale.