bonnefois: ghost_factory @ LJ (Default)
[personal profile] bonnefois
Title: Counting Stars
Series: Stardew Valley
Character/Pairing: Maru/Female Farmer.
Rating: PG at most
Summary: Maru hits it off with the new farmer. As their friendship grows, Maru wants more.
Word Count: 8138
Author's Note: Pine4Pine, for Somecallmemichelle.

Your notes on the request got me thinking. And it ended up with ace sapphics Maru/femFarmer.

I used "Marie" as a default name for the farmer.



*

Maru had just entered from inside when she heard a single name. Marie.

"Marie? As in Curie?" Maru's ears perked up. Of course, a dead scientist wouldn't suddenly revive. (And her actual name was Maria Salomea Skłodowska-Curie. Maru always remembered to cite that on her papers.) At least, not until science found a better. A scientist who had died for her cause. And had her work largely stolen by male colleagues.

But, perhaps father had brought back a fascinating new biography.

"It's the new farmer. Remember there? We went looking for specimens to collect," father said.

Yes, she'd gone with her father there. The old farmer had died and there was no one to contest them getting rock samples and then some water samples. Her father and her had been studying on turning garbage into a form of energy source. So far, it hadn't worked entirely, but she'd managed some truly spectacular recycling methods. So many of her gadgets were from reclaimed tin cans fished up from the depths, that she might have to be careful JojaMart didn't claim a patent on her work.

Her father's first gift to her had been a microscope, long before she could even use it. The second, a telescope. Some of her earliest memories were father lifting her up so she could better see the lab samples and the squiggling little creatures that where so small as to be invisible to the human eye. When Sebastian had left the dinner table early to go to his room, Maru had begged to go study just one more sample with dad.

And that was how it went.

Just one more page of this fascinating book about the cosmos. Father always let her. And one page usually turned to two, then before she knew it, it was almost dawn.

Maybe Marie would grow strawberries. She remembered the old farmer, how he'd sent strawberries as a thank you to. They'd been so delicious. Perfectly fresh. Even the memory made her mouth water.

*

Maru stepped down the path. She'd taken this shortcut many times before. Now, it was an unidentified variable. Would this farmer appreciate the company?

There was dirt smeared across her pale face. Her brown hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail. Leaves and sticks were caught in it. Her knees already had grass stains on it.

And--it was endearing, even nostalgic. Because that was about how Maru looked when she was in hour six of working on her gadgets, after a morning of hunting for the perfect lab samples with her dad.

"You're Marie?"

"The one and only. Around here, anyways. I'd give you my hand, but it'd get you all dirty."

"Hehe...I don't mind. Half the time, my hands are covered in dirt and oil from working on gadgets and finding samples."

"Quite a storm we had yesterday, yeah?" Marie said.

It'd been on a day she had off, thankfully. She'd spent part of the day reading a book, and then worked on lab samples her father wanted to go through. It'd been an especially productive day, considering that she'd managed to finish the book, the samples, and the gadget-though there'd have to be more test runs to make sure the program was sound.

The only damper was her brother, who had locked the door and holed himself up with his backlog of work.

Sebastian only came out once the rain stopped to see if any frogs came out, and then only after dark.

Now that they were grown, Sebastian never wanted to go to the library with her or look at samples. He was more a boarder than a brother, as much as it hurt to think.

She kept thinking of reasons to try and talk to him. She'd even studied programming a bit to try and talk with him more. It was great help in making her gadgets work even more. Now, with this new programming language, called--Dragon, like Python but bigger, she'd managed to make an even better operating system on her most recent development project.

"It wreaked havoc on my crops, though," Marie said sadly. She motioned to the parts of her crop gridwork which were blackened to a crisp.

"You know, with the right ingredients, you could make some lightning rods. There's lots of free space on your farm. You can even harvest battery packs from them. I make them whenever I get the chance. Though, going into the mines is difficult."

"Really? That's a great idea. I'm still new to the tinkering part."

"Let me get you some schematics. I've got a ton."

"That'd be great," Marie said.

And Maru thought, you're my kind of woman, that's for sure.

*

On her way back from work, Maru took the roundabout way. The one which led her past the farm. Marie wore flannels and jeans, slightly dirty from farm work. Marie pulled up a lobster trap effortlessly. Water dripped from the sides.

More than the dynamics of physics, Maru found herself a little distracted with the way the flannels were rolled up. But not in the way of wanting to 'climb someone like a tree' as she once overheard Haley say—and which had confused her enough to go to the internet to figure out what that turn of phrase meant—but in the way that she had to kind of marvel at the wonder of Marie's genetics. How her long slightly undone French braid of brown hair was so silky, how she was so strong.

Science really was fascinating, especially when it was all about the body of a beautiful woman.

"Any luck fishing?"

"Not really. Mostly I've been fishing up garbage."

The top sprung up, and from it showed a bit of driftwood.

Maru almost said Leah would love that, but stopped herself, and she didn't know why. She couldn't quite name why the thought of Marie giving other women gifts bothered her. She'd have to ponder over that later.

Then, it came to her. Of course. It was because she'd rather reuse the driftwood herself. Driftwood could elicit some excellent results when put through a recycling machine. Leah would turn it into some art project, but Maru might just solve every problem with the world with it.

"You'd be surprised at the things you can do with garbage. Speaking of which," Maru said.

Maru pullws out a book of schematics (her very favorite) and held it out.

Maru smiled. "Here's a housewarming gift."

Marie took it, and began to flip through it. Her fingers left smears of dirt, and it matched the smears of oil and dogeared pages of Maru's own copy. "Wow, there's so many machines here."

Maru laughed.

"Isn't it so great? I was going to lend you mine, but I use it every single day. Even though I've completely memorized most of the instructions, I always check back. Maybe partly for nostalgia's sake."

It'd been a gift from her father, another reason why she couldn't part from it. Mother had chided him, only to have father proven right when Maru utterly loved the gift which seemed far too much for an eight year old.

"This is so amazing, I don't know how I'll ever repay you," Marie said.

"Oh, just pay me back in strawberries--or bars. Iron bars, copper bars, gold bars, even iridium bars. I use them in my work all the time."

"At the clinic?"

"No! Though I could set a broken leg like that if Shane hurt himself again."

Honestly, most of the time at Harvey's there was nothing. Pam had her yearly check up where Harvey told her not to drink. Not sternly because Harvey never quite could be stern. Or, Shane passed out and hurt himself again, Cliff hit his arm.

Not a lot happened.

"So, you like iron bars, huh?"

"Flowers are okay, but I haven't figured out how to use them to power my gadgets yet. Unfortunately, my attempts at biofuel have only produced compost and fertilizer. I'll happily bring some down for your crops."

"That'd be great. Farming is more difficult than I realized. I had a huge problem with crows for a while there."

"Oh no, you forgot the scarecrows?"

"No handbook. I just tried to make it myself. The results weren't pretty. Crows devoured my crops."

"Maybe you need to write it. The Farmer's Handbook."

"I just might."

*

Test 1.

I suddenly find trash fascinating. At least, more fascinating than usual. There's just so much possibility. I pick it up at any opportunity. Recycling machines are like a vacation and a festival day all in one. They are little more than miraculous with the kinds of things they can do. So far, I've managed to turn driftwood and soggy used newspaper into lighting devices, broken old CDs and broken to refined quartz, and smelly garbage sometimes even into coal! I must keep trying these to see if I can make a sustainable form of biofuel. Even more, spending time with Marie makes these endeavors even more fascinating. I can't wait to see what we create together!

Test results: Successful so far.


*
Maru found herself taking the shortcut more and more, at any excuse she could give herself. Marie sure had livened things up. As much as she enjoyed Penny's company, Penny couldn't appreciate the joy of making a clock by hand, or

But, she felt a kinship with Marie. Especially with the future plans to one day build their own machines together, and make good use of these."

She stopped to appreciate the new shed mother had built. As always, mother was a bit of a workaholic, just like father was. She could finish huge carpentry projects in mere days, and they were made so sturdy, too.

"There you are, I was hoping I'd see you," Marie said.

"I was just admiring your new building. Mother did a wonderful job."

"She did, come on in."

Marie had been busy. She'd already made a recycling machine from Maru's book of schematics.

"I'll have to bring you trash next time to put in it. Usually I collect it from the river."

"I got some refined quartz out of it. It's amazing that I could get that out of trash."

"It is, isn't it? You know what they say...'One man's trash is another man's useful experiment which just might change history."

"Or at least let me make more machines," Marie said.

"Speaking of machines—Consider this the first of many thank you's."

Marie pulled out a beautiful silver bar from her bag. It shone in the sunlight, glittering and captivating. Frankly, Maru was more excited about this than the possibility of jewelry or flowers. Just think of the gadgets she could build with this.

"Thanks! Just what I needed."

She smiled.

"And, I've got something for you."

Maru opened up her satchel and pulled out the treasures that nobody else saw. What clogged the rivers, all down from the city, but she helped make into her gadgets.

"Ooh, broken CD's. My favorite," Marie said.

"In fact, I've got enough to fill up a bunch of loads. I'm pretty eager to see what we get out of it."

Maru couldn't help but laugh.

"I think you're the only person other than me who'd be so excited to get some garbage to work with," Maru said.

"We're two of a kind, then," Marie said.

And that made her so happy to think. Of course, she liked talking to Penny. But, Penny didn't get the joy of pulling apart a gadget and making it better. But Marie did. Marie didn't care about dirt under her fingernails, and found joy even in a bunch of smelly trash. All because of what it could become.

"You've been working on your shed a lot," Maru said appreciatively.

New wallpaper was on there, like stars. A whole row of furnaces filled the side. Marie had even made a bunch of chests on her own. With Robin as a mom, Maru knew fine craftmanship. And Marie had a great start on her own gadgets.

(Just that thought was so exciting. A whole room of gadgets other than her lab. And a friend to work on them with.)

"I made a bunch of more things from your schematics. Look at what I got."

Marie opened up a storage bin and pulled out a little bottle. Maru recognized it right away.

"Oak resin?"

"I need it to help seal. I had one of my barrels leak on me. It was a mess."

"Could you save some for me? I'd be happy to share more of my schematics."

"Of course. I planted a whole forest's worth of seeds and when they grew, I began to sustainably harvest some for materials," Marie said.

"They grew already?"

"The ground is super fertile down here. Trees grow so fast, it's enough to make a scientist's head spin," Marie said.

"It's true, father and I are endlessly fascinated with how fast crops grow in the valley. Speaking of which, mind if I study your crops from time to time?"

"Of course I don't. Go ahead; I'm sure you'll give me great pointers. Anyways, I'll be glad to have your company."

"You mentioned barrels. I can never resist a barrel. Let me see?"

"Go for it."

Maru hunched over to better see the contraption, all used to better age wine. The wood was sound, and the metal was mostly so, but she noticed just a little problem, which would make a big mess.

"You haven't used this one yet, have you?"

"No, I need to go berry picking," Marie said. "I haven't gotten around to it."

"Good, because there's a structural infirmity at the bottom here. See?"

"You're right. I didn't even notice it. It was my first time making one, so--"

"No worries! I'll fix it right quick."

Maru pulled out a blowtorch and safety visor. Because if there was one thing her father always impressed on her, it was to always remember her safety gear. Father had ordered special extra small goggles so she could be his lab partner before she even gotten into double digits.

"You just carry a blowtorch with you? That's pretty impressive. I didn't expect to see you pull that out."

"Not to work most of the time. I don't think Harvey would appreciate that."


"It could be handy, if you had a robot come to the doctor," Marie said.

Maru laughed. "Oh, you have no idea."

Because Marie didn't know about the secret project in the back. The gadget to end all gadgets. The sort of thing which would definitely get her funding, and patents. If she could just perfect it.

"I had plans to work on gadgets today, so I packed it, just in case I wanted to work on my break. Actually, I was just going out to try and get some ores from Cliff to smelt. I love spending my days off getting a wide variety."

"I go into the mines all the time."

"You sure are busy. Managing to hold down a farm and go to the mines constantly. And you always remember everyone's birthdays. Haley was bragging that you gave her a bouquet of Daffodils," Maru said.

She'd felt something then, somewhere between a twinge of something unnamed and pride that her friend managed to do it all. Farmer, miner, and actually have time to befriend the townsfolk.

"Actually, your schematics taught me how to make some great sprinklers. Now, I just have to occasionally put some fertilizer in and harvest. I have way more time and energy to go into the mines."

"I might be able to upgrade them. Then you can reach even more crops for a more efficient farm."

"I'd love that."

*

Spring turned to summer and hot days. Of course, Maru had fixed the air conditioning in the lab, and the clinic as both of them needed temperature control, lest some of the heat-sensitive samples get destroyed.

Summer also brought with it a welcome return of one of her favorite times of the year. The town had even made a habit of it, where some of them stayed up late enough to watch the yearly meteor shower.


Starry Night. Maru mapped the constellations. The Perseid were to arrive soon. Cassiopeia there. She'd memorized them by age ten. By twelve, she had mapped much of the skies.

People wished on shooting stars. What was the origin again? Surely some form of folklore. Maru didn't focus much on folklore, unless it was the mythology to help her remember the name of the stars. She was too busy working on getting ready for her degree. What would it be? Rocket Science? Astronomy? Many she'd go for a double major like her dad did.

The entire town had gathered to witness this yearly event of the summer meteor shower. Maru often stayed up quite late to watch through her telescope. This far away from the city, it was quite a clear sky full of stars and trailing shooting stars.

Marie hadn't showed up yet. Maru kept glancing back, and waiting. Watching. Then she'd play with her hair and pretend like she was just looking for meteors.
"Did you make a wish?" Jas said.

"It's useless to make wishes. It's not like they'll come true," Shane said.

"Aww..." Jas looked to her shoes. Shane drank another sip—make that gulp—of beer.

Someone wished for love, surely. Maru wished for more parts for her robot. They still eluded her. She'd even had Sebastian help her order some from the city. He had ordering from newegg.com down to an art. And to her surprise, it wasn't a farming site. (Imagine how much Marie would've liked that one.)

Not that she though the wish would be fulfilled. These things were mere fun. Maru wasn't so scentific that she couldn't take part in some festival for a little rest time.

But don't you want it? came a thought. And the thought looked like Marie smiling back at her.

The spouse? The kids?

Not if it got in the way of her first love, science. Maru could only be with someone who accepted that, and accepted her.

And what came with it? What of that?

Maru had mapped herself as well and found that part, the one that craved sex, wasn't in the package. And it was fine. She'd found the name for it: Asexual. She knew she was not broken; simply different. And with finding the scientific name, it felt good, it felt right. Every time she'd see it (unrelated) in a textbook, she'd smile.

But, Marie. Marie wasn't part of the equation of life + degree + vast scientific achievements + possible future wife (who wasn't into sex and didn't mind having a wife who could fix any machine, but never had time to cook.

A varible. Friendship + unknown + unsure if Marie shared her preferences + her future. What was the equation? It just didn't fit. Alas, she couldn't just pull out a blowtorch and fix the questionable structure.

She could just ask. But would that shatter this special thing between them?

She needed more data.

"You showed up finally," Maru said.

"A bit late, yeah. One of my chickens got out and I had to wrangle her back into the chicken coop. It took longer than expected."

"You want to come back to my mother and father's place and look at my telescope? We can get great views of the rest of the meteor shower."

"I'd love to," Marie said.
They headed up in the dark, with the lights of fireflies and starlight to guide them. Maru had theorized putting solar powered lights to make the mountain path to make it safer, but father rightly pointed out that this might compromise the environment.

Still, she thought it was worth it to maybe install them in the town itself, if she could get Louis's permission. Funding wouldn't be an issue as Louis never paid out anything. Marie and Maru had done most of the fixing around here.

She led Marie into her lab. Not just anyone got to go in here. This was her place. Besides, they wouldn't understand the history. The piles on the work bench had nostalgia, dangit! That wrench was a gift from her father, that hammer from her mother. And so many more. Maru had to have been one of the only eight year olds that begged for power tools for birthdays.

"Don't mind the clutter; I was hard at work on a project. I tend to just throw myself into them until I lose sight of everything else."

Like the empty cans on the work bench. She grabbed them and put them into the nearest recyling machines. Maybe she'd even get something nice out of it.

"Don't worry. You should see my workbench when I'm in the middle of making casks. Wood shavings everywhere. I had to go get myself a N-65 when I worked, otherwise I'd be sneezing too hard to stop."

Maru couldn't help but laugh. It was such a relateable feeling. Especially the part about proper safety protocol.

"Now, now, you should've had protective goggles and a N-65 all along," Maru said.
"True, but I'm a bit new to this. I'm learning on the way."

"Just don't get hurt."

"You'd patch me up, though, right?" Marie said.

"I'd rather it not come to that," Maru said.

Marie leaned in to look at the telescope.

It felt right to have her here, late and night, watching stars.

"I'm going to make some hot cocoa. You want some?"

"Sure, I'd love some. With little marshmallows, if you have them," Marie said.

"I figured you would go into the kitchen."

"Oh, I have a coffee-slash-hot-cocoa-maker that I built myself. I tried just buying one, but I wasn't really satisfied with the speed-efficiency-flavor output. Besides, I had a blast making one."

"You really are something, Maru," Marie said softly.

Maru just smiled back, unable to bring up words. Because this moment was too quiet, too precious to say anything. For a little while she was glad to busy her hands with pouring out the

"This is good stuff."

"I buy it online. The JojaMart brand tastes like sawdust. And I'd snow what sawdust tastes like. I've certainly had to spit out enough while working on projects," Maru said.

Marie laughed. "I know that feeling."

Maru grabbed a blanket, worn from use. It was fuzzy, and blue, with little white and yellow stars on it. A gift from father, for his future astronomer-slash-scientist, because even as a kid Maru couldn't decide a singular career path.

White, beautiful shooting stars fell down from a starry sky.

"This is gorgeous. Thanks for inviting me," Marie said.

Maru smiled. "I'm glad. I hope we can do this next year."


And even though wishes were unscientific, Maru would've wished on every shooting star there for this. Just a little more of this.


*

Luau day came on the hottest day this year. She forgot her sunscreen. Maru rubbed at her arms, sleepy from the heat.

Marie came late. She'd dressed down, out of flannels. She showed so much more freckled skin. Maru couldn't stop stealing glances, then second guessing herself.

She produced a fresh-grown pepper for the soup pot.

"Careful, or Shane will swipe it," Maru said.

Emily danced on her own. For once, Maru thought of dancing in the heat, and dancing with Marie, but didn't ask.

Maru blamed it on the heat. It was impairing her cognitive functions, obviously.

*

An uneventful work day turned not so eventful when Linus hauled—dragged, really—Marie's body into the clinic.

"Marie? What--"

Harvey sighed.

"Overwork in the heat. Us doctors see it a lot this time of year. I hope it's not heatstroke," Harvey said.

Cold compresses. The clinic had air. Several bottles of water. Maru's mind raced as she gathered them. She'd always been good in the heat of the moment, too.

Maybe she'd inherited it from her father. He kept a scientific, even cold gaze in the most troubled family fights between him and Sebastian.

"Is it okay if I sit by her?"

"Of course. I'm going to check in the back to make sure we have enough fluids on stock. She'll need to drink a lot."

Hyperthermia was the official name of both Heatstroke and heat exhaustion. Heat exhaustion would equal a bad day. Heatstroke might come up with the worst headache Marie had ever had, and it might last days.

Father had gotten it before, when he was too focused on gathering samples and didn't pay attention to the clear signs his body had given him and his core body temperature.

Marie's eyes were closed. Sweat had made her tangled brown hair stick to her forehead.

Maru sat at her bedside, unable to focus. Sometimes, when her head was a mess, she'd go through really simple equations. Like, grade school equations. The sides of a triangle, functions, stuff like that. It felt nostalgic and helped keep calm her down.

This time, not even trying to focus on the specifics of a right triangle could help her mind from racing.

Theoretically, she knew that Marie would very likely not die from this. She'd been found in time. Heatstroke could result in neurological damage—but there was a chance this hyperthermia was simply Heat exhaustion, which would be likely less damaging, at least.

There was a problem with knowing too much. Usually, Maru studied things which didn't cause as much worries. (Well, outside of the chances of what a foreign object slamming into the earth would be like.)

But, Maru could itemize this. Number every symptom. And it only made her more tense.

Maru changed the cold compresses from time to time. If she didn't know better, she'd have her heart checked for this rapid, irregular heartbeat.

It'd bee happening a lot around Marie.

Honestly, Maru wasn't entirely clueless. She'd known she had some interest in women, albeit not a sexual one. But, their friendship had started out with such rapport that she'd still not looked at it fully.

The feelings.

Now, all her facts were easily forgotten as she tried to focus. Tried to detach. But, she kept—she kept--

Oh, she needed a cold compress herself. Because the odds of the symptoms she'd seen so far weren't deathly, and she still had never quite felt like this.

Like losing Marie might shift her world completely.

Finally, Marie stirred with a low moan.

Maru grabbed Marie's hands and squeezed them.

"Marie, you're awake!"

All this got was a "grrgnng."

Reluctantly, Maru let go of Marie's hands.

Maru held up one finger, and frowned.

"Marie, I always told you to wear your safety gear. Consider cold drinks a part of your safety gear. As important as wearing your goggles," Maru said.

"Sorry about that. I wanted to put in a lot of coffee beans. A shame I can't employ some fairy to help me harvest stuff," Marie said.

Marie rubbed at her forehead.

"Do you have a headache?"

Maru checked off the list. Flushed skin...only a bit, but she wasn't sure if that was a burgeoning sunburn. Rapid breathing, high body temperature...now, where was that thermometer?

"No, though I feel kind of dizzy and weak. Honestly, I'm been overworking lately."

Maru brought the thermometer.

"Open up, okay?"

Marie's lips were a deep red, and distractingly kissable. Maru focused her mind on symptoms instead. Nausea, racing heart rate, slurred speech, delirium, seizures, coma, irritability...none of them seemed to fit, but she'd have to keep an eye out.

The thermometer gave a promising result.

"Phew, it does sound like it's just heat exhaustion and overwork. Heatstroke can have serious consequences, though. So don't play around with working too hard in the heat. I don't want to see you in here again, so make sure you don't forget to have lots of fluids. Even more than usual in this heatwave."

"You don't want to see me?" Marie said.

"Not passed out and brought in by Linus," Maru said.

Maru sighed.

"Be careful, okay? You really scared me."

"Sorry, but it was good to wake up with you here."

Maru smiled.

"Don't worry, the doctor's bill will scare you into drinking water," Maru said cheerfully.

It'd kept Shane out of the bar for a while last time he'd been brought in for passing out. Mostly because he couldn't afford beer on his salary.

"In fact, I'll write it up now," Maru said cheerfully.

"If that's what it takes, I guess," Marie said.

"Just one more thing: stay in here a bit. I want to make sure you're cooled off enough."

"Would you keep me company if you did?" Marie said.

"We get about one client a week if that. I'm sure I can spare some times to tell you in great length about what I turned garbage into," Maru said.

"Sign me up. If I knew I'd get to hear about garbage transmutation, I would've collapsed from overwork long ago."

"Maru laughed.

*

Now that she knew, and there was no going back, there was nothing to do but what Maru always did: study. Because she was Maru, daughter of Demetrius, she always went right into the research part.

(Honestly, the thought of a good session in the library made her heart flutter about as much as Marie did.)

Maru scoured the library, then began to check other book stores online. How to date your friend, when you are a woman and your friend is also a woman and you don't want to have sex and would rather talk about robots and garbage produced zero results.

Maybe she'd have to write the book.

*

Night of the Jellyfish. Glowing, beautiful tendrils filled the waters.

Naturally, as one does, to her friend-who-she-wanted-to-be-more, she was spouting off jellyfish facts at a record pace.

Maru sat on the edge of the dock and kicked her feet.

Marie had turned in her farmer flannels for a crop top and shorts. The freckles on her back looked like the constellation called the summer triangle.

"Also there's a jellyfish called the Immortal Jellyfish and it's the world's longest living animal--"

"I guess we all could stand to be like jellyfish," Marie said.

Maru laughed. She couldn't stop talking, or just taking a huge bin of facts and dumping them before Marie. Because she wanted to discuss every single scientific achievement from the entirety of history with Marie.

Well, and to discover them all, but with Marie, it was special.

She almost lost sight of the beauty of the glowing jellyfish, distracted by the beauty of the friend-who-she-wanted-to-be-more beside her.

"Look, Maru," Marie said softly.

She motioned to the spectacle beneath them. Glowing like stars, hundreds of jellyfish danced beneath the waves.

"Did you know the ocean is largely unexplored, and there's fearsome and gruesome creatures in the utter depths of the ocean?"

"Tell me more," Marie said.

"I might keep you up all night," Maru said.

"Frankly, talking about obscure science facts is what I'd want to be kept up about. That and farming,"

"What if we did both?" Maru said

"Now that's my idea of a good time," Marie said.

And she felt joy—but a metered, measured kind. Where she planned to keep it down before she got her heart broken for jumping to conclusions. Because this was friendship and friendship was great. It was just she wanted to kiss Marie sometimes between talking about science.

*

Beginning of autumn began and the nights grew colder. Marie had really increased the efficiency of her farm. She'd even started to raise some animals.

And sometimes, (a lot of times), instead of tuning out because she was thinking of scientific facts and gadgets she'd get to after work, Marie would be there. A wrench in the mix.

Obviously, Marie was the most eligible bachlorette around.

Maru dreaded the upcoming gossip that Marie was with someone else. But, jumping in with insufficient data felt wrong. Waiting too long felt wrong. She kept reading how-to relationship books, even on her lunch hour. She'd sneak a few pages even during working hours. Harvey was too nice to ever say anything.

If asked, Maru would say she was studying. It wasn't a lie.

*

In a reckless, midnight work—the sort that usually resulted in either robots or explosions, no in-between—Maru wrote up a questionnaire.

1) Are you interested in women, and if yes
2) Are you interested in having children, preferably by adoption, though robot children are also an option. If yes,
3) Are you interested in having a wife, if yes, then
4) Are you interested in having a wife who will absolutely never make you dinner because she is too busy making gadgets and/or robots, if yes, then
5) How are you on a wife who is not into sex, is personally fine with this part of herself, if yes
6) Come to think of it, maybe I should've started with the girlfriend hypothesis. This entire plan was a bust.

It sounded more like a resume than a love letter. Maru crumpled it up and pressed her head to the drafting desk.

Working with tech was just so much easier than love. If only she could put some oil and tighten a bolt and make this work.

*

Test 2.

Subject, hereto now known as "girlfriend potential, and future wife material" (FW for short.)

In my studies, I found out that Violets are a symbol of lesbian and bisexual women in the the fifties. I asked FW her thoughts on violets.

'they're pretty enough. Why, do you want me to grow some?'

It did not result in her suddenly speaking lesbian to me. Lesbian is a language I seem to need to learn because I certainly do not speak it fluently. Especially not to other women. Let alone ones as alluring as Marie.


Test results: inconclusive.

*

Test 3.

Lilies are known as symbol of gay and bisexual women in certain cultures. I brought it up.

FW said, 'I've never grown them. Do you like them?'

Again, I have made no progress in ascertaining whether this is a doomed plot or not. Which sounds like one of Sebastian's D&D games, now that I think of it. I think going into a dungeon would be easier than telling my friend that I seem to be in love with her. Or at least very attracted and likely to fall quite hard at any minute now.


Test results: inconclusive.

*

Test 4.

In theory, I had a plan to make it obvious and drape the lesbian flag over myself. Alas, I found that not only was there not a singular lesbian flag, the more I looked the more I found. In the end, went down a rabbit hole and ended up reading the history of the many (and counting) lesbian flags to Penny over lunch. She found it amusing, but preferred the Pansexual flag because it had more yellow in it. I hypothesize that perhaps the abundance of flags is the nearly darn peer reviewed reason why lesbians keep having trouble flirting and getting mixed signals. After all, imagine trying to signal by putting a flag, only to realize you put on the wrong one.

Oh, that and the homophobia. You can never forget that, even if you try.

I did find out that many of the other flags I found were not official flags, but were due to a lesbian programmer who made the 'lesbian flag generator meme.' (Say that three times fast!) but had mistakenly been reported as official flags. I was absolutely excited when I managed to get it to generate 'robot-loving asexual mixed-race lesbian' lesbian flag. I may get stickers made, and maybe add my own custom design. With a robot on the front, of course.



Test results: incomplete, due to sheer amount of flags. (Later annotation: After writing this report, I found dozens more. And bought a Pansexal flag pin for Penny to go with her dress, so it wasn't a complete failure.) I still plan to make myself that flag. I'll have to draw up a design later.)

*


Test 5.

Upon online research, I was quite pleased to find the term 'Bambi lesbian' which referred to lesbians who preferred kissing, hugging and other things to sex. It was in fact featured in The Alyson Almanac" in 1990. I asked FW about her thoughts on Bambi.

"That old movie? I cried my eyes out. Do you want to watch it together sometime?'

We did watch it together. And we did both cry our eyes out all over again.



Test results: inconclusive. Also, movie weekends are a thing. (The line between dating and friendship can be very narrow and confusing at times.)

*

"I only get three channels out here. I never really bother to do much more than check the weather."

"I picked up a broken DVD player and decided to see if I could fix it."

She'd installed glowing lights for mood, improved the reading quality and made a bunch of other fixes along the way. Sure, the parts had probably cost hundreds, but the journey was totally worth it.

"Doesn't Jojamart sell them pretty cheap?" Marie said.

Maru laughed. "What fun would that be?"

"I haven't gotten a couch yet, so we'll have to sit on the bed," Marie said.

Maru climbed up. Her palms sweated enough to make her fingers slip as she lifted up the

"So, what is it today? Sleeping Beauty? Tangled?"

"They need to make a Disney Princess who likes to build stuff. They're cute to rewatch, but I want

"Next from Pixar-Dreamworks as a crossover with Disney: The Girl Who Decided She Was Tired Of Being In That Tower, So She Built Herself A Grappling Hook Out Of Paperclips And Got Out Of There."

Maru couldn't contain her laughter. The comforter was worn, but super comfy. Maru laid back, and let the softness envelop her. The moment, the covers, Marie close beside her, but not enough to touch.

"Your bed's super soft," Maru said.

"Not bad for being like, twenty years old," Marie said.

Wait, did that come on like a come on? Did this whole thing have a netflix and chill vibe?


But, Marie didn't come closer and kiss her. She sat on, and looked at the dvds, as the minutes picked by. At this rate, they might spend the "movie night" just talking, while the DVD screen bounced around in the background. And that would be fine with Maru.

Together. On a bed. Not kissing.

Maru wasn't sure if she was disappointed or not. Maybe a little of both.

*

One day, she had a complete eureka moment. Supposedly, Socrates yelled just that in the bathtub, but for her, it was over lunch, when Penny said those fateful words:

"Did you know that Emily is now dating her friend?"

Her brow furrowed. "Shane?"

She hadn't heard.

"No, Sandy," Penny said.

Her female friend.

Maru couldn't stop smiling.

"That's the best news I've hear ed all week, Penny."

She was so excited to get to work, she hurried off after lunch and got right to the next stage of the plan.

If the Pining Problem kept on nd the internet gave her jack all detail on how to figure out if Marie was into her, (but gave her lots of schematics and fascinating facts about science), then Maru would have to take it into her own hands. And ask another person into women lots of scientific questions.

Like how to confess to another woman and not have it blow up in her fact, like her last attempt at roboting did.

*

Test 6.

Told all to Sebastian. He said I was a 'useless lesbian.' I had to research this term, only to find it was related to the phrase 'too gay to function' often used on social media sites. The 'useless' was more in talking to women and not being actually useless. I may repurpose those terms for being around Marie does, in fact, make me feel 'too gay to function.'

Test results: Actually fruitful. I may get a 'too gay to function' sticker for my lab, because it resonates so much.

*

Note to self: was taking a notebook to take notes like she was a journalist taking an interview of a celebrity too much? Because she almost felt giddy at the thought of interviewing Emily.

Because Emily won. She was dating her friend. They would probably get married at this rate.

"Oh, Maru. Come on in. Did you come to see me, or Haley?"

The house was shared between Emily and Haley, and it showed. Fabric in the back, a sewing machine, and the strong scent of incense. Oh, and rocks everywhere. Anymore sunlight and she'd be blinded, and super distracted identifying the stones by sight alone.

"Actually, I wanted to ask you some questions, if that's okay."

"Oh, do you want me to get my cards? I can give you a free tarot reading," Emily said.

While occasionally fascinating, Maru didn't particularly care such things. Unless it was the answer to how to fix her woman problem.

"Actually, I wanted to ask you something else," Maru said.

"Oh, then sit down," Emily said. She motioned Maru to the couch.

"I brought some of my stones to liven the aura of the room. Some cherry quartz, opalite, smokey quartz and citrinne."

Maru looked them over. While pretty, she didn't need her microscope, or the magnifying glasses she used when she studied rocks and minerals with her father.

"Actually, Opalite is man-made, 'cherry quartz' is just dyed glass and that Cirtrinne is actually just cooked amethyst often sold as 'real Citrinne. Also a lot of fake smokey quartz is treated with radiation."

The one time she didn't take her Geiger counter with her, because she wasn't sure if she needed one or two notebooks.

Emily laughed. "Oh, it's not about the stones, it's about the vibrations your aura puts into them."

Which summed up Emily completely.

Emily brewed some sort of floral-smelling citrus tea, and brought it back to her. Maru sat on the edge of the couch.

"What was it you wanted to ask me?"

Maru pulled out her notebook and balanced it on her lap.

"I heard you have a girlfriend now."

"Oh, yes. That's what you came to hear about?"

Emily laughed. "Actually, I had a dream that foretold that you would come. I even had a hint it would be pretty gay."

Interesting, but not completely scientifically sound. It could be a complete coincidence. Though, studying the precognitive possibilities of dreams would be an interesting diversion. After her double major and stint in grad school was done, of course.

"How did you manage it? You're dating your friend now? Honestly, it feels like you won at life," Maru said.

Emily laughed. "Well, I'll tell you."

"Sandy and I have been friends for almost as long as I can remember. I think we were friends in another life. Maybe even lovers back then as well. The minute I met her, I just knew Sandy and I would be soulmates. The only thing was I didn't know if she would be a friend soulmate, lover soulmate, or both."

"Honestly, I spent a lot of time scrying and dreaming. Checking my tarot cards and listening to what my soul said. I didn't want to wreck our friendship."

"Sandy asked me to come visit out of the blue. Even past when I usually visit her. We were sitting on the bench side by side and she reached to cover my hand with hers and told me that she had feelings for me."

"We kissed in front of the sunset. It's one of the most beautiful memories of my life."

She'd been so slackjawed and in awe at the story that Maru had forgotten to take a single note. She caught herself and finally jotted down quick notes. Which looked more like a flow chart.

CALL FRIEND? ----> SIT ON BENCH TOGETHER ---> PUT MY HAND ON HERS ---> GIRLFRIEND TIME????????

"We talked a lot. And we'll still be long distance for a while, but I'm happy to wait."

"You've helped me more than you can imagine. Thank you so much. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a plan to work on," Maru said.

And with that, she left Emily's sweet smelling and sparkly house.

*


Just like when Maru got ready to defend her thesis (though she had many years before that, she still spent time daily practicing), Maru looked to the mirror in her room.

"Ahem. So, Marie. We've been friends all along. But, you know, um..."

Maru cleared her throat.

"I like you more than a friend. Honestly, I think you're girlfriend material--even wife material. Though, I'm not into sex. Or cooking. Or cleaning. In fact, there's a high chance you'll be tripping over gears and oil all over the house. And I'm not sure how to bring this up without making it awkward. I've been to study you, but I can't figure you out. Which only makes you prettier to me. Anyways--"

"That's fine," Marie said. "I'm into women and not into sex either. In fact, that would be ideal."

Maru turned around slowly. She felt her face heat at the realization her friend was right here.

"U-Um, Marie! You're early!"

"Yeah, I thought you wouldn't mind. You usually like promptness."

"So, is it true?" Marie said.

"Absolutely. I couldn't really ascertain if you shared my feelings. I've been trying to make tests to gauge your feelings. But they all came out so inconclusive. So, I was going to finaly just blurt it out."

"I figured I was pretty obvious," Marie said.

"Obvious? I haven't had a conclusive test in ages. The flowers--"

"I ordered them both to grow for you, by the way. You're going to have some bouquets in your lab soon."

"I'd rather grow samples to test air purity effects if that's okay. So, could you get me some seeds or shoots to transplant?" Maru said.

"You're a lady after my own heart," Marie said.

"And then I asked about movies with a significance to certain phrases--"

"Bambi is a gay thing?"

She explained about Bambi lesbians. Which had surprised her as well.

"Oh, so that's why. I thought maybe you were asking me on a Disney movie themed movie marathon date."

"So, that was a date?"

"That was totally a date, Maru. We have been practically dating this whole time," Marie said.

"Practically dating isn't actually dating, though," Maru said.

"Did I have to spell it out, maybe hold up a big I AM INTERESTED IN YOU sign?" Marie said.

"It probably would've helped. I work better with direct instructions, sort of like you'd see in schematics," Maru said.

"I mean, I certainly thought you were interested in me. You brought me garbage," Marie said pointedly.

For a moment it was like there was a NOW LOADING note on her brain. Wait a minute, so the only one out of the loop was her? Marie thought they were flirting and kinda gay all this time????

It was like she had USELESS LESBIAN and TOO GAY TO FUNCTION written on her forehead. Had she and Marie been flirting all this time and she'd just overthought it? So it was her tests were all actually really conclusive, but she'd missed the obvious?

"Here, I brought you some strawberries and an iron bar. Oh, and some garbage, for nostalgia's sake. And for the recyler."

"You are such wife material," Maru blurted out.

"I probably shouldn't have said that out loud yet," Maru said.

"Don't worry, I think you're wife material too," Marie said.

And then, instead of kissing, like some big dramatic movie moment, they put garbage in the recyler, and jotted down the fascinating data.

*
Test 7.


Step one: Call her over.
Step two: talk in the mirror to prepare.
Step three: get walked in on by friend/future girlfriend.
get walked in on by friend/future girlfriend?!
Step four: friend becomes girlfriend!

Test results: Task failed successfully.




A/N
Notes on Bambi lesbian--seems to not be a specifically lesbian term as some previously thought, but a general ace term.
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