fic: A Sorta Fairytale (3/3)
Dec. 24th, 2017 03:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bonnefoisTitle: A Sorta Fairytale (3/3)
Series: FE9/10
Character/Pairing: Ike/Soren, Ranulf/Kyza/Lyre, ensemble, Elincia, Skrimir/Ilyana(/Mia)
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 9930
Summary: College AU. On the first party of the semester, Ike is kissed by an anti-social Science major. The rest, as you would say, is history. Ike/Soren.
Author's note:![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
longfic_bingo: high school/college.
Janet's birthday comes right around the time Philomela escaped from the helljob. I intended to actually put it out around that time, but I fell down with an infection and it didn't come up until now...when Janet and Philomela are both having bad weeks. Also, I revised a lot of the earlier chapters.
Thanks to everyone who cheered me on and put up with slow updates.
Oh, and I never mentioned that the title comes from the Tori Amos song, did I? Whoops.
Before you judge my choices, I was drunk at almost every stage of writing this, including the editing. Actually, that probably doesn't help. I'm the most boring drunk ever. I once got drunk and then spent the entirety of the night organizing my pdf folder.
The worst alcohol-related choice I made while writing this was mixing Grape Koolaid with Coconut rum. I finished it, but top ten regrets right there.
The other 30% of writing was 4AM bad NaNoWriMo choices.
Wind betaed it, and now qualifies for sainthood for making sense of some of the latter parts.
Actually this has just been sitting in gdocs since about Thanksgiving,. The PSU on the PC blew.
*
Patience was not Ike's strong suit. Two days on, and it'd taken quite a bit to give Soren that space to think. Ike had checked the cards, but there wasn't exactly one for My roommate messed up, sorry about that. I didn't think he'd take it that far, or I would've shut it down immediately.
The thought of showing up with flowers seemed preposterous. He grimaced, barely able to imagine the cliché scene, like the kinds he'd seen in many movies. The rain-soaked man at the doorway, with an apology that kind of sounded like a pop song.
But leaving his hands empty felt strange. He couldn't quite define what Soren was to him, so that made an apology all the harder. He danced the edge between almost friend and almost something else, something Ike couldn't quite tell.
What would Soren prefer? In the end, Ike could barely list anything but what Soren didn't like. Books were a possibility, though he couldn't exactly buy a bouquet of them.
Or could he? Ike filed that thought away for later.
He checked the price of the textbooks, and the books he might read, and instantly scratched any idea of books. Even then, he couldn't even tell what books to get Soren, only that he probably didn't want Swept Away In My Knight's Arms by Goldoan publishing.
Ike headed towards the bus stop. His bomber jacket was pulled tight against his throat. Just three years ago, this coat had been passed down from his father to grow into. The leather scent still left Ike filled with bittersweet memories. As much as he tried to memorize the plains of his father's craggy face, he found himself forgetting little things. For months, he'd listened over and over to the answering machine his father had made, until Titania made a new one. As if he could keep his father alive, one leave a message after the beep at a time.
It'd been several months since he returned to the old farmhouse, yet it still held the old pang of nostalgia and bitter memories. The wallpaper of yellow flowers had faded with time. Pictures of Greil, Mist and him were hung on every wall. As he went on, more of his father's associates came into the pictures, though the one's with Shinon always were filled with him making a rude gesture towards the camera.
Every time he came back, it felt like everything come back to him. As if father would just be in the other room, going through his files. Titania sat at the kitchen table. A rope of braided thick red hair fell down her back. She laid her palm across the gingham blue tablecloth, just beside her tea. As she caught sight of him, Titania smiled. Ike noticed new lines at the corner of her lips.
"It's been a while, Ike," she said. She stood up and reached for him. Her hugs were always so tight, they felt like a headlock.
Titania smiled wryly. "I didn't expect to see you back so soon. You missed Oscar's cooking that much?" Titania said.
"A little, but that's not why I came. Do you have any tips on apologies, when you're apologizing to a friend?"
"Is this about Shinon? Generally the idea with him is simply to pay for whatever he broke, and explain that he's a hateful drunken mess of an asshole, and it isn't personal."
"No, though I'll file that away for later," Ike said.
He explained the situation. Titania folded her hands on the table as he spoke in quick, terse sentences all that had taken place. The ill-fated game, the aftermath, and how he'd lost the trust of someone who he'd barely even had a chance to meet, or befriend.
He left out the kiss; that would just complicate things.
Titania lifted up her cup for a sip. The seconds spanned on.
"I think you already know the answer, Ike. It sounds like you're asking permission for something you've already decided."
His father was always the one who taught him the hard lessons. He remembered swinging his fencing foil, thinking that one day, he'd reach his father's level. He hadn't swung a sword since the coffin was laid into the ground. Greil had missed his graduation, his full scholarship to college, so many birthdays, and now this new part of his life.
It was a new ache to match the old that he couldn't tell his father. He'd never be able to show his diploma, tell each time he made a touchdown, or show him Soren. Sometimes Ike felt like he was getting better, but the moments crept up on him, until he felt like an outsider in all the parties and joy around him.
And as much as Titania had been a part of his life, she could never completely fill the hole which was left. Ike lived, but with a limp, with an old war wound across his life.
"Yeah, I know. Thanks, Titania."
He rose, and left the house and its many memories. Lights unfolded as he got closer, back to the edge of Gallia. Ike was close to dozing, when the sudden stop made him jerk awake.
Gallia, again.
*
After the knock, there was such a long period of silence that he almost left. But the door opened a crack, and he didn't slam the door in Ike's face, so it was a start. He clasped the book with the knights tight against his chest, like a shield.
Ike cleared his throat. "I should've spoken up, I'm sorry. I didn't know they meant to put you on the spot like that," Ike said.
Soren was silent for several moments. Finally, he sighed. "You did. Eventually."
"I should've done it earlier," Ike said.
"I suppose it took an awkward turn for you as well," Soren said.
For a stranger, he knew Ike far better than Ike knew him. Ike stood at the door, at the halfway mark between coming into Soren's life and remaining outside with nothing but the confusion and the memories of that night.
Soren cleared his throat. "Did my notes help?"
"What? Oh, those. They're good. I actually felt like I understood the material better. Thanks."
"Good," Soren said.
Soren stepped back, but left the door open. Ike took it as an unsaid greeting, and let himself in.
It was clear which side was Soren's, and which was Mia's. Soren's had bookcases built into every wall, and even under his bed, while Mia's had swords mounted on the wall, and not just practice foils. It couldn't be more divided if there was some sitcom's tape between the room.
A closer look showed them with titles like The Anatomy Of A Cell and A History of Daein.
Mia's side had an orange bean bag chair covered with the logo of her favorite team, the Pegasus Knights, while Soren had a reading chair which had to be antique. Ike didn't know one period from another, but it didn't look like the sort of thing somebody picked up at the local Goodwill, or off the side of the curb. He ran his hand across the top, only to find it red velvet with an edging of gold.
It looked almost like a throne.
"It was a gift," Soren said tersely.
Ike looked back.
"I'm not sure what you're looking for in a social call. I'm no good with people, surely you've noticed this by now."
"We had a pretty good talk before," Ike said.
"That..." Soren clutched the book closer to himself. "That won't happen again. I won't allow myself such foolishness."
"If you're holding back, then don't. You never know when people won't be a part of your life anymore."
It was only after he said the words, that he realized his blunder. It sounded like a threat, like some kind of emotional blackmail, something he would never do. Soren looked pale, as if he might drop the book he clutched so tightly.
"I didn't mean it like that. My father died. I still think about the trips we always talked about and never got to," Ike said. It came out more gruff than he intended.
"Mine too. We weren't close," Soren said. "The opposite. I wasn't the type of son he wanted."
Ike turned at this unexpected revelation. Soren looked so small, so fragile. All he wanted was to wrap Soren up in his arms, until all this disappeared. So, he did. With Ike, there was no in-between, just the thought and the action. Soren tensed against him, the book was brittle, with pointed edges that dug into his chest. But Ike didn't let go.
The contact felt so right. Soren fit just underneath his head, snug and safe. Wrapped in Ike's arms, Soren slowly started to unclench his body.
"Anybody who rejected you is an idiot," Ike said.
He stroked Soren's hair.
"I'm sorry. I can't even comfort someone properly," Soren said. He stiffly pulled away. Ike expected him to bolt, but he simply stepped back. When he looked up at Ike, he was unreadable. Was it confusion, hurt, or happiness? Ike couldn't tell, as Soren's entire being seemed to shift between each emotion.
"You take that book around a lot," Ike said.
"It was a―birthday present," Soren said.
Soren clutched it to his chest, almost in a tender gesture. His dark hair fell over his shoulders as he looked down.
"You should--"
Ike's phone buzzed, interrupting him. Soren fell silent.
"They can wait," Ike said.
Three more texts came.
"I better check; it might be an emergency," Ike said.
Three texts from Ranulf. Coach Largo called an emergency training session!! Apparently, the scouts came back and the Wyverns are really tough! If you don't come soon you'll never hear the end of it! That guy bench-pressed tigers! Don't make him mad!
"Go on. I wouldn't hold you up."
Ike couldn't think of a way to fill this, so he simply nodded. He wasn't any less confused by Soren, but at least they'd mended things slightly.
*
Largo's training sessions were always punctuated by those blaring Youtube videos made from clips of movies and motivational speakers. Sometimes, he'd look at Largo and wish he'd gotten a chance to meet Ike's father. They would've had old war tales to share, Ike was sure of that. But that was just another thing that would never happen.
Largo always kept his 'troops' as he called them, until dusk had fallen.
Ike returned with aching muscles. It'd been good to work out the confusion, the feeling of something like a forgotten word on the tip of his tongue. Except the word was Soren.
After a few aspirin and a hot shower, Ike headed to the kitchen. The fridge wasn't just rusty, but Rusty now. Mia had apparently named it after they'd gone on when Soren had stormed out. It even had a name tag. Ike hadn't exactly been there, because after Soren went he just didn't feel like hanging around and watching everyone else party and turned in. He'd always been a heavy sleeper who could conk out despite whatever party was happening. It was probably the only way he could remain friends with Ranulf.
He was about to drink straight out of the milk carton when he had a moment or something. He reached up on top of Rusty and got a red cup plastic cup, poured the milk into the cup, instead of the usual drinking from the carton thing.
"I saw that," Ranulf said. He shook his head, then paused to cringe a bit. "At this rate you'll be domesticated, you are one step away from being a house cat."
"Domesticated?" Ike said. Especially after the Never Have I Ever incident. Ike hardly paid attention to the 'bro code' or whatever the college guys were into these days. For all his talk of being a 'wingman' or 'pilot' Ranulf had certainly done him no favors that night.
"Yeah, you've got domesticated written all over you. You know, I'm going to get started on my best man's toast. Today, even and all this is totally going down on it," Ranulf said.
"That's a bit early. "It's not even February yet," Ike said.
"You say that, but it's almost prime wedding season. I've got to get in my order early, before the rush comes in," Ranulf said.
Ike just shook his head and downed his milk. From a cup, no less, as opposed to the usual dorm habit of simply drinking straight from the carton. Something was happening here. It had come around the time Soren had appeared, but Ike couldn't tell if it was connected or not.
Ranulf had been training Ike bit by bit for the Flip cup and Beer Pong championship. This involved a lot of trash-talking, beer drinking, and kegstand lessons from the champ, Skrimir.
What didn't happen was a lot of flipping of cups, or throwing of ping-pong balls, but that was really extraneous. Anybody could flip cups or toss a ball. So Ranulf trained by drinking a lot of beer and talking trash. Like most parties, Ike was just there because it happened in his apartment.
According to Ranulf, Skrimir had superhuman beer drinking abilities, and resisted getting smashed like some kind of metaphor or other. There was a reason he wasn't taking Modern Tongue 101, and his metaphor fail was right there near the top.
The way Skrimir arrived, no one ever missed him. In fact, the best description would be like a giant furry lion version of the Kool-Aid guy, except he occasionally used doors.
"I have arrived!" Skrimir bellowed. He hefted a large keg, and when he placed it by the couch, Ike saw that it was an older keg which the top had been sawed off of, and it was filled to the brim with fried chicken.
"Beer battered wings. Nice," Ranulf said.
"That is not all, for I have brought another keg for practicing for the beer pong championship!"
He was out the door in a flash, and in a second he was back with a keg and a tiny girl on it, behind him was Mia who was rolling in another keg. There were seven kegs of fried chicken and ribs in all. Ike made a mental note to go to whatever parties Skrimir threw. They were more his style than what Ranulf got up to.
"The little science major eats everything," Skrimir said with pride. "I met her in an eating contest, where she soundly thrashed me!"
"So....hungry," she said, and nearly fell into the couch.
"Here, little science major. Eat some wings."
"Foood," she said, her voice going breathy with desire. She fell face first into the bucket, and just as Ike was going to help her out, he realized she had already eaten a fourth of the bucket. Ike had never seen anyone dig into chicken wings like that. He couldn't help but think there should be awards for that kind of thing. Maybe her minor was in eating?
"That is some snarfing power," Ike said.
"I bet she likes to eat otherthings," Ranulf said with a wink.
"Like burgers?" Ike said.
"...Yes, Ike. I'm sure she likes burgers," Ranulf said, shaking his head.
For a moment she came up for air from devouring pieces of fried chicken. "Burgers are...delicious. So are hot dogs, especially with relish and mustard, oh and pizza is good too, and milkshakes--"
Ike nodded in approval. "Pizza's pretty good, especially the meat lover's kind."
Both Ilyana and Skrimir's eyes lit up. "Meat lover's pizza...." Ilyana said breathily. "Are we ordering some?"
"Only the best! I can buy ten of them at once and eat them for lunch!" Skrimir said. "Now she can eat twenty."
Ilyana had barbecue special sauce smeared all over her face, and Skrimir just grinned a huge, toothy grin.
"Right now we're working on getting her a gym membership, so she can go pump iron with us," Mia said.
Ike looked skeptically at her. Ilyana looked like if she held onto a balloon big enough, she'd float away. "Can she even lift up the bar?" Ike said.
"Surprisingly, she can lift up a lot when she isn't fainting. Skrimir keeps snapchatting her lifting instead of helping spot her. But that's just the start. We're gonna make her buff and strong! Or at least able to get up the stairs without help," Mia said.
Ilyana lifted her hand up for a sauce covered triple brofist with both Skrimir and Mia.
"Wow, you guys are getting along famously," Ranulf said. "Pretty good of me to introduce you, huh?"
"Yes, yes, you have the sense between us," Skrimir said.
Ranulf grinned. "We've been friends for ages. He always got in trouble, and I was the skinny but handsome cat chasing after him going 'Skrimir, no!'"
"At least once or twice, he stopped me from doing anything rash," Skrimir said. He nodded to the memory.
"Probably why the place is still standing," Ranulf said.
Ike sat on the floor across from the trio, because Skrimir practically took up the whole couch, and Ilyana fit because she was tiny, and Mia was sitting on the armrest. He had his very own keg of chicken and ribs.
"So, how has Soren been?" Ike said.
"Ooh, this is the part where I get pumped for information! I've never had to be the go-to roommate before, especially for a guy. This is pretty interesting," Mia said.
Ike frowned. "It's not like that."
Ranulf laughed. "Admit it, Ike. It's totally like that."
"Mmmm-hmmm," Mia said.
"This isn't a hook-up, or whatever you call them. It's just there's something I should know, but don't. Does that make any sense?" Ike said.
"It's called liking someone, Ike. It's not a big mystery. Actually, it is, but that's beside the point. Hey, Ilyana, lay some science on me."
"Biological...imperative... Hormones... Organelles..Meiosis...H-haploid and Diploid...p-periodic table...ah...I'm so hungry...."
"Quick, her sugar's crashing! She needs more food, stat!" Mia said.
Ilyana leaned against Mia. She let out a pitiful moan, and Mia reached into the pouch at her side and procured a bag of cheez doodles.
"I don't know how she even manages up those steps to the sci major land, they're pretty hardcore," Ranulf said.
"Well, she doesn't. I was carrying her up scienceland on my back, but now Skrimir helps. And then we have to do her homework for her, sometimes, when she hasn't eaten in long enough, which I think is about zero-point five seconds. Which gets interesting as we're both sports scholarship students, and Skrimir is always doing his homework after three kegs. I think the last paper we did was about how rainbows taste salty, and then we submitted a cat macro about stars. We got a C+ for originality."
Ike didn't even begin how to explain it to himself, let alone other people. So he didn't. Instead he went back to lunch, and actually managed to get a few bites in before Ilyana gave him the puppy eyes and stole his entire keg.
After that, he went out to the fields. Coach Largo nodded at his dedication, before he went back to telling the art teacher about how he'd bench pressed those tigers once.
*
Everyone was a little off with the upcoming exam season. Only Ranulf would stay cheerful, as he mysteriously passed every one of his tests after never studying and partying all night, even the day before finals. Ranulf was made of miracles, or possibly under the table deals from the Gallian royalty. No one could tell.
Coach Largo didn't let them have breaks, even if it was snowing, sleeting, off-season, or The cheerleaders used to practice at the same time, but they were moved after several guys on the team but him were having bouts of distraction. Ike had never seen the issue; they were just frilly skirts. It didn't stop random people from staying in the bleachers. For some reason, a lot of random girls used that time to brush their hair, apply lipstick and talk about stuff, and wave to him. Ike figured there were tons of better places to brush their hair, especially in this weather.
For some reason, this always made the girls scream and giggle. He never really saw the joke in waving back when someone waved to you. Ike just brushed it off as one of the mysteries of life.
He looked forward to practice all day, with Coach Largo yelling about how back in his day, he could lift two of the Tigers players one in each arm. Eventually it'd just fade to this angry background noise, like Skrimir was bellowing at the game and smashing beer cans to his head, and he could just lose himself in running laps, or going through the training stuff. Mia, and Ilyana were working their way through a bag of Cheetos.
The person he didn't expect to see was Soren, who had a textbook spread across his lap.
"Hey, Mia. How exactly did you and Soren become roommates again? Was there some backroom deal?" Ranulf said.
"Soren thinks his family back in Daein heard about my sword skills, and was trying to pair him up with a great swordsman. I'm flattered, but I'm not exactly his type," Mia said.
"Too cheery," Ilyana said.
"That too. Needless to say, we aren't getting married anytime soon." Mia said.
Daein? That'd explain the trace of an accent Ike couldn't quite place. Several of the crowd glanced over to Soren, looking for his res
"Be nice. We just went through this," Ike said.
"Roasting is a sign of friendship, Ike. Look it up, it's in the dictionary and everything,"
"No dictionary says that," Soren said.
"Urban Dictionary does," Ranulf said.
He held up his arms in a cheer. Mia joined him, because she'd join in on anybody's happiness. Whether it was dancing when Skrimir did the I passed another class victory dance, or Skrimir's My chicken nuggets came, now let us devour them dance.
Soren's phone buzzed. He frowned at the screen. "I have to take this."
Soren left his bag, and even the book he'd always seen clutching.
*
The meeting mostly consisted of Largo flexing and pointing at a bunch of the highlights of his old career before he got that injury. But by the time it was done, Soren still hadn't showed.
"Soren's been gone a really long time," Ike said.
"Maybe he had to take a giant dump or something. He eats like nothing but shredded wheat. He's like rooming with an old guy. That's actually the perfect metaphor for Soren. He hates everyone, he'd probably tell kids to get off his lawn, and he'd probably willingly wear crocs," Mia said.
"Worse; I saw him wear socks with sandals. Lyre lost about three lives just from seeing them. She started a Change.org petition to burn them for the sake of humanity. She got five hundred signatures and everything," Ranulf said.
Ike ignored their comments and scanned the crowd. He had never taken much stock in the supernatural. But he had a sense of impending dread, one that reminded him of rain on stone, and the tall black armor that filled his half-forgotten nightmares.
"I'm going to go check on him," Ike said.
"Good thinking. You wouldn't want him to fall in," Ranulf called after him as Ike made his way up the bleachers for a better view. Ike shielded his face from the sun with his hands as he glanced across the rest.
It was mostly empty, save for the girls. Some dated the football players, others wanted to, and still others followed him around for some unknown reason. They were always giggling and making awkward conversation when he had to get to class or practice.
Ike took the stairs, and walked the long hall to the gates, until he was almost to the road. He caught a glimpse of dark hair in his peripheral view. Soren's back was to him, a slim phone held to his ear.
"I'm here. What do you want?"
A car passed by, and Soren's voice was drowned out. Someone climbed out of the black sedan. He wore a dark coat, with a collar that came well up past his chin, like the knight of Ike's nightmares. It was only at that flash of light, the metal of a shotgun raised that Ike realized what was happening.
"You're breaking up. I can't hear you. What?" Soren said. It was only when the gun clicked that Soren clutched tighter to his phone.
Son? Soren? Soren? came a voice over the phone.
He didn't think, only moved, tackling with all his strength. He heard a roar in his ears, and then burning, burning. In the movies, everything went in slow motion, but for Ike, everything seemed so fast. Two seconds until his breath was knocked out from him, three seconds until he tasted blood in his mouth, the explosion of pain in every single nerve of his body.
Soren said something else, but the words turned sharp inside him. He tried to blink, but nothing cleared, it got more confusing. His head felt like it was pushed underwater.
There was burning spreading from the crown of his head down. Everything was shaking, and the images blurred until they kept going together and he couldn't tell what was what. There was glass on the pavement. shimmering and shining, like sun on water.
And it wasn't just the pain, but the memory of pain that left his mind aching.
"Ike? Ike! You can't leave me again. Please, Ike!
*
Ike opened his eyes, only to close them again to get away from the bright light.
"There you are. Need more pain medication? I can...let's see here. Ah, there you go."
The nurse pushed some button and something definitely changed. The world grew softer, the pain started to fade.
"Is....he all right?"
"The man you saved? He's fine. You were a real hero," she smiled then. "Oh, but the attacker got away. I hope they catch him soon."
"Morphine?" said a familiar voice.
Ike opened his eyes again, with a little more success this time. Soren didn't just look angry, but determined, like he was willing to fight it out for a cause. Ike wanted to say something, but his mouth felt so dry so all that came out was a hoarse whisper. Neither of them noticed right off.
"Oh, no. This is a new type of painkiller. It isn't addictive at all. The clinical trials have been really promising," she said.
"And the side effects?" Said the voice, harsher this time.
"It's very recently been released for medical use. There's almost no side-effects. It's an old Heron secret which was finally released by the Heron royal family. It was even sponsored by the Duke of Persis himself."
"If this drug is faulty, you will hear from my lawyers personally."
"Um, sir, there has been no evidence--"
Soren frowned at her, seeming to notice a name tag for the first time. "You're a student? You mean to tell me they have mere students taking care of Ike?"
"It's part of my training program, I assure you that all the stitches and bandaging were done by registered nurses, I was only supposed to do the rounds and watch while a nurse with more seniority...Really, she was supposed to be here--"
"And where is your superior now?"
"She...had to take a call, she should be here shortly," the girl said apologetically.
"It's all right, Soren. Don't worry about it. Everything will be fine," Ike said.
Ike pushed himself up, and both the nurse and Soren reached for him. Soren pulled back, like he'd been burnt.
"Please don't get up yet. I know I'm still inexperienced and learning. But I'll do what I can until Sigrun returns," she said. There was a deep resolve in her eyes, through the hurt.
"You're trying, that's what matters," Ike said.
"That motivational speech doesn't account for much when it comes to someone's ability to practice medicine," Soren said coldly.
Her brown eyes widened. "I--"
"I've yet to see any credentials for--"
Ike cut him off. "That's enough. I think you need to sleep, Soren," Ike said.
His phone buzzed, and Soren looked down. He reluctantly took to a corner and began to answer whatever message he'd gotten. After several more buzzes, Soren let out a sigh and went for the door. Somehow he looked both harsher and more fragile than Ike had ever seen him. Thick dark circles curved under his eyes. Even his steps were slightly off, as if he might nod off right there between the fake plants.
"I'll be back. Don't think that I'll forget this. Should his care be mishandled..."
Ike rubbed his head. He wasn't sure what was going through Soren's head, though what was going through his was somewhere between ow and what the hell just happened?
He got a better look at her when the brightness of the room became manageable. Her green hair was in a bun pulled up from her face, and she wore white and light purple scrubs with pegasi all over them.
"There you are. Glad to see you're back with us," she said. She smiled in a way that reminded him of Mist, with a pureness and light which spoke of past sadness underneath.
"It wasn't too bad," Ike said.
"Your report begs to differ. Though he really should be sleeping after all that surgery," she said.
"I'm not nodding off anytime soon, considering that I just woke up," Ike said.
"I mean your little friend, here. He stayed all night, we couldn't even get him to leave...they were going to call security, but I pulled some strings and got him a pillow." She said.
"Don't worry, it's not personal. He hates most everyone and everything," Ike said.
"Ah, yes. Soren's always been like that. One of those...what are they called, emus?"
"I don't think he's a bird," Ike said.
Though damn if he didn't have bird bones.
"I'll remember the term eventually," she said. "Anyways, he was low on sleep and worried about you. When you're like this, you get used to being yelled at. In a way, it's part of the job. Comforting them where you can. Sometimes the stress gets to people and they break."
"Was everyone else all right?" Ike said.
"Amazingly, no one else was hit by the bullets. It was so close, you caught every single one. The shooter was lost in the crowd, and there's been no luck in catching him." She reached to look over the IV drip.
"No one thought you would make it. A hit at that range, well..." She fell silent.
Suddenly it all fell into place where he'd seen her before. There'd been a big media storm about a missing heir found.
"Aren't you the queen or something?" Ike said.
She ducked her head, her cheeks flushed pink. "Well, I suppose you could say I am the princess. I was never raised in the castle, though. My father was afraid of a media storm, a succession crisis. You know how it is," she said, with a smile.
Actually, Ike didn't, but he didn't say that.
"Aren't you busy with ruling and stuff like that?" Ike said.
"My family wasn't too happy initially...but I want to help my people and understand them so I can truly rule well when it's my time. If war breaks out again, I want to be able to lead them and be able to change their dressings at the front of battle if need be. I've gained so much patience and empathy I never would have. I've seen tragic things, but I've helped heal some wounds. And I'm honored to be able to help my people in any way I can."
"I'd vote for you," Ike said.
She laughed. "It doesn't quite work like that."
He smiled a bit, and then grimaced in pain. "I know."
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you laugh. That'd make the stitches hurt. I promise I'll be extremely unfunny next time."
A little red light flashed at the door.
"Oh, you've got another visitor. Just push that button if you need me," Elincia said.
"Hey, Ike. Did Soren storm off when he saw her?" Ranulf said.
"How'd you know?" Ike said.
"Figured. Also, Skrimir owes me ten gald You got real flesh wounds and all. Even Skrimir doesn't have that kind of manliness appeal. I bet he's going to have to fight a dragon to get back his manly cred."
Ike grimaced. "I don't care about stuff like that. Soren being okay is all that matters."
"I told him you'd say that. Now he owes me twenty gald," Ranulf said.
He pulled out his phone and showed a picture. Skrimir, Mia and Ilyana lifted their hands up in a fist, all in solidarity. Shinon--Ike had no idea why he was even there. Alcohol, probably--flipped off the camera. Heather made a very rude gesture: her tongue between a v.
Ike wouldn't have even known what it was, but Ranulf took his lack of slang personally and made him study Urban Dictionary for at least fifteen minutes a day, even if some of the results were scarring.
"Everyone's glad you're okay, but we're super bummed you'll miss the playoffs and the beer pong championship. I mean, if you took a drink, the beer would just spurt out your bullet holes. You'd win every one," Ranulf said.
"I think that only happens in cartoons," Ike said.
"Soren freaked, though. He kept calling your name and clung so tight that Mia had to pry his fingers away from your shirt when the paramedics came. He kept going 'don't leave me again, Ike.'"
"Again?"
He hadn't thought of Soren other than the intelligent, slightly strange boy who'd kissed him on a whim. But the more he found out about Soren, the more he knew that Soren didn't have whims.
"Hey, don't ask me. I think we need to get some kind of private investigator up in this. It's like some film noir epic. We've got assassins, gay love affairs, and I even saw a lady in black in the waiting room," Ranulf said.
He saw a very tall silhouette. The visitor's light flicked on. She cleared her throat.
"Speaking of which, I better get out of here. She looks like the type of lady to call a hit on someone before her morning vodka. Stay strong, Ike. You'll be healed up and back on the field before you know it," Ranulf said.
The woman stepped in without knocking. She watched Ranulf leave, and faced Ike only when they were alone.
She was clad in black, speaking of old class and old money. Ike's first thought was she has to be lost.
"You saved my son, and for that, you have my gratitude," she said. It sounded almost curt, even accusatory. Only a woman like her could make a thank you sound like a slap to the face.
She was massive, at least six feet tall, yet as he looked, he could see reflections of Soren in her. Her imposing, even haughty red eyes, her hair swept across her shoulder, that showed a different sheen in the light, the sharp angles and sharper words. Except where Soren's eyes were filled with bitterness and hurt, her’s were filled with an untold power.
"This, however, doesn't mean I've forgotten what your father did, nor what you did."
"I don't know what you're talking about. My father died years ago."
"Proof that there is some justice in this world," she said.
Ike flinched. He couldn't even respond to such harsh words.
Her gaze was steely and cold. "Listen now. Don't you break my boy's heart again. I'll claw out your heart and eat it if you even think of making him cry." she said.
Ike had no doubts that this threat was entirely serious. But when it came to Soren, he wasn't about to back down. Not to this imposing woman who had barged into his life, and not to the barrel of a gun.
"Listen, lady, we already worked that out. My friends go overboard sometimes. It got out of hand," Ike said.
"You have worked out nothing. You left without even a goodbye, and caused him untold sadness."
Ike shook his head, but it only hurt. Everything seemed very far away, with no hints of these gruesome memories.
She held out a black envelope, and tossed it onto the bed. "I cannot take anymore of your ignorance. Even if my son is determined to withstand it, I will not be so accepting. Open this only when everything seems hopeless, and not a moment earlier."
She turned and left without a goodbye.
Ike was left reeling from the conversation. His first thought was I can almost see where Soren got it.
Ike noticed something on the chair. He tilted his head, and saw that in his rage and hurry to leave, Soren had left his book. He reached out and picked up the heavy tome of a book. Something about string theory? Ike didn't even know Soren liked knitting. Something slipped out.
It was a photocopy of a picture. Two boys were grimacing at the camera. One of the boys wore a pirate hat so large that little more than his chin and nose could be seen peeking from underneath, while the other tried to adjust the hat. The other boy had a bandana tied around his little head, but he could definitely tell that it was Soren.
The book itself was really dry, not his thing at all, but he couldn't stop glancing at the picture. Even as he grimaced, he still seemed like he might burst into laughter as he fought with the hat. He couldn't imagine Soren now breaking into laughter, but if this picture was right, he once could have.
He set the envelope beside the bed. Ike didn't reach for it. As far as he could see, things were far from hopeless.
*
Soren didn't return for a while. Or at least Ike guessed, as he'd fallen in and out of sleep until he wasn't actually sure what day it was, or the time. Ike woke up one of the times and Soren was there, writing down notes and reading. Homework, maybe?
"You came back," Ike said.
He had dark circles under his eyes, and he looked even more pale and fragile than usual.
Soren closed his book. "I would've come sooner...I fell asleep. I'm leaving in a few hours," Soren said.
"Back home? Your mother came."
"I know; I met her outside," Soren said.
"Well, you've gotten to the point where you actually tell me. Progress, I guess," Ike said.
Soren inclined his head. "I suppose."
He glanced down. "This was my fault. I'm sorry."
"For what? I'd do it again and again if it meant you'd be okay," Ike said.
Soren closed his eyes. " Don't say such a thing. You could've—you could'vedied. For a moment, I thought you had...that I'd found you again, only to lose you..." His hands trembled as he closed his book. "...No. It keeps happening because of me. It won't happen again."
He got up, and put his books into his messenger bag.
"Soren, you need to sleep," Ike said.
"You're right....Goodbye, Ike." He didn't look back as he closed the door.
He hadn't even gotten a chance to give Soren back the photo. Ike pulled it out and glanced over it again.
*
If Ike had his way, he would've been out of there the minute he woke up. He didn't have much to do, except surf through the channels. Ranulf had once joked that Ike's life turned into a soap opera, and considering that this Life Of The Melodramatic Or Whatever It Was Called featured a dark haired bitter girl prone to running away, he was starting to wonder if Ranulf was right.
He turned it off a little bit after the dark haired girl decided to marry the guy's evil twin brother. At least she was brainwashed to explain it, because the guy was way better than Evil McNasty, who only wanted to steal her away for evil plots and life insurance policies.
Then it was just him and the dull throbbing ache at the top of his head and the vague beeping sounds of the hospital. He checked out the room around him, but it wasn't too interesting. There was a fern which looked fake which made Ike wonder why they'd take the trouble to put a random fake plant in there, various machines, horizontal blinds, and a whole lot of white. He bet Kyza and Lyre, fixing duo that they were, would've done something with it.
He didn't have a roommate, and Ranulf and the group weren't anywhere around. Even Soren was off somewhere--he'd have to apologize for being harsh on him earlier. Soren was probably pretty stressed, but taking it out on a nurse wouldn't help anything, especially when she was only trying to help.
But a flash of the visitor light dragged his attention away from the soap opera.
Titania's hands were filled with several packages. "Sorry for the wait, I had to secure the rest of the group before I could buy the tickets," she said.
In one was a small ziplock bag of cookies. In another, it was a bit of smoked jerky. Ike hadn't had anything nearing real food—let alone homecooked—for far too long. He went straight for the jerky.
"Mist wanted to send you some 'Magic Meatloaf' to make you feel better. I didn't have the heart to tell her it'd probably make you feel worse."
Titania handed over a card. Get Well Soon was plastered over the front in glittery letters between large yellow flowers. Inside were many signatures and well wishes.
"Mist picked out the card?"
Titania smiled. "That she did."
On the other side was a large blacked out portion.
"Shinon's?" Ike said.
Titania grimaced. "He snuck it in while I wasn't looking. Thankfully, I hadn't written mine yet and caught it."
"Let me guess: 'go fuck yourself?'" Ike said.
"Part of it. He got into details; cacti were involved. But that's neither here nor there."
A whole desert worth of cacti must have been involved, because there was a lot blacked out, almost the entire other side of the card.
"The police have been searching for the man who attacked you and Soren. There's some big reward from Soren's homeland. Despite all this, I don't know that he'll ever be found." She pursed her lips together. "Sometimes life is like that."
His mind went back to the picture, and everything that Soren's mother and Soren had hinted at. Pirate hats and smiles, and yet all he had were vague images he couldn't piece together.
"Titania, Was I ever in an accident like this before? I think I remembered some things. They don't make any sense. Like, I shouldn't remember them."
He'd never seen the Daein Keep in anywhere but documentaries. The figure bent over his mother looked like his father, clad in black armor.
It was just a half-formed dream.
Titania sat down. It took her several moments to speak.
"It was a long time ago. Greil didn't speak of it, but I know something happened. You were under the care of a therapist for a long time. After he began to work with you and Mist, there were no more night terrors. But before then, you and Mist would draw and speak of strange things, gruesome things."
Two boys playing pirates. You left without a single goodbye.
His head ached like it was splitting open. Flashes of images were just beneath the surface, but he couldn't quite grasp them.
"That's all I know."
But Ike remembered the envelope. He knew whatever his past was, it would lie in Daein.
*
When Ike finally got out of the hospital, Soren was gone. His side of the room was a series of boxes stacked high. Even the bookcases had been emptied.
"He might be transferring. I don't know, he was pretty upset. I could barely get him to talk," Mia said. She hung her head, her usual cheery demeanor disappeared.
A party in his honor had been planned, but when the release date was pushed back, it went on without him. Ranulf sent him the highlights. The flip cup championship, and the beer pong championship came next, and more debauchery. Ike shook his head. He felt faintly tired just looking at the pictures.
All he felt was relief to have missed them.
"Since you can't drink with the medication, I brought some Grapeade. It tastes so much like a wine cooler, it's like high school just punched you in the face," Ranulf said. He poured it out in a red cup, and handed it over to Ike.
Ike stared down at his cup. He remembered a first time he'd seen Soren, between cheesy bacon bread. Like dots on a map, he connected them. Onethe way he looks at me, so desperate and wary, two the way he softens around me, three that kiss.
"Something up?" Ranulf said. He lifted his eyebrows. "You're awful quiet.
"He's in love with me," Ike said.
"Yep," Ranulf said.
"Wait, you're not surprised? You already knew?" Ike said.
"Yep," Ranulf said.
"So you knew all along that he loved me, and you didn't tell me?"
"It was much more fun this way. Besides, if I told you, you'd run off and do some stupid gesture which would scare him off. Sort of like the things you did without my help, come to think of it," Ranulf said.
Ike was already up and reaching for his coat.
"...Like you're going to do now, huh," Ranulf said.
"I don't want to wake up one day and think there was so much I could've said and that chance isn't there anymore. I didn't get that chance with my mother and father. Even if I crash and burn in the process, I can live and know I tried."
Ranulf rose up from the couch, and clapped him on the back. "It's a long shot, but I like your odds."
Ike only went back for two things.
The black envelope and photo waited for him on his desk, the cheap one he'd gotten at a Big Lots closeout for on sale, because the left metal leg was damaged. He had to put a book underneath the leg to keep it from wobbling.
For the first time, her words struck true. Ike opened up the envelope. Inside were two tickets to Daein. There were no dates, and yet they seemed valid. Anytime tickets? Ike hadn't even known those were a thing. Apparently, this woman scoffed in the face of rules.
What had she been planning? She took Soren away, and then she gave Ike the means to follow after him.
Or had it been Soren's choice?
Either way, like hell was Ike going to let Soren just leave his life like that.
*
The sound of the train lulled Ike to sleep for hours. He arrived to snow and frozen earth. He should've brought a thicker coat. Ike thrust his hands into his coat pockets, and took a bus through the city. It was surrounded by a thick stone wall, with stone apartments and houses all the same shade of gray as a winter morning.
Within the envelope was also instructions, and a seal upon a letter. A note was attached to the letter, with large, swooping handwriting.
Offer this to the guards. Then you will be let in without a hassle. Even you can accomplish something as simple as this.
Through the snowy cobblestones, past the wooden gate and into the keep. The guards accepted the papers at every station. His jacket hadn't been enough. Even a tan Carhartt was little against the Daein wind.
The stone walls were covered with animal head trophies, weapons, and tapestries worn with age. As Ike walked in, he was greeted with a map and pamphlet of Daein's historical sites.
Once, they had survived on taxes and the blood of their people. Now the last of the royal family survived only by tourism.
Ike checked the library first. More often than not, that was where he'd encountered Soren before. The air inside the castle wasn't much warmer than outside. A place as old as this must've been a nightmare to install a heating system in. Ike half suspected that Ashnard hadn't even tried.
The bookcases were made of thick dark stained wood, and went up to the ceiling. It looked more like a barracks than a library, with the many weapons hung upon the walls.
Ike passed The History of Daein, volumes 1-25 and Myths and Folklore of the Continent of Tellius as he walked by. He found Soren seated at one of the large tables spread out for study, a textbook laid out before him.
"Hey," Ike said.
Soren flinched, and his pen clattered to the floor.
"Ike... What are you doing here?"
"Your mother gave me this," Ike said. He handed over the envelope. "Right after she threatened to eat my heart if I ever made you cry again."
"That's my mother for you," Soren said dryly. He set the envelope aside on the large tables.
"You shouldn't have come... You were almost killed. You took a bullet for me," Soren said. He clung to his book with a tense grip to keep from trembling.
"Of course I did, Soren. I'd do it again."
"It was just an assassination attempt. It's not worth risking your life over," Soren said.
Soren sounded far too jaded for someone his age.
"...you've been through something like that before?" Ike said.
"Your father's name was Gawain then. He served King Ashnard. I'm sure you've heard of him before?"
"The mad king Ashnard? The tyrant?"
"That's the one. He was my father," Soren said.
Soren turned away and looked out the massive windows.
"I didn't show the potential he wanted. What did he think? That I would come out some kind of monster, with scales and wings? I wouldn't be surprised, when it comes to him."
"Soren..."
"I was kidnapped at age five. Come to find out, my father did it to test my mother’s loyalty. He was always doing that, testing loyalties. Until someone turned on him and exposed his crimes. It's a theme in the Daein royal family. This was hardly the first time, nor will it be the last."
He still had a hard time reconciling the idea of a prince and Soren. The words seemed to not fit together, even slightly. A prince in sneakers and tight jeans, with a shirt that had some nerdy flippant quote about Chemistry that he didn't even begin to get. Schrodinger’s Cat walks into a bar, and doesn't.
"You're a prince? Really?"
"It's just a meaningless outdated title. Kings and queens are little more than figureheads for the senates these days."
Ike shook his head, but it only hurt. Everything seemed very far away, with no hints of these gruesome memories.
"You haven't even remarked on my father," Soren said. "Go on. Get it over with. I've heard enough from the papers. I'm used to it."
"I would never judge you on who you're related to. Besides, I already met your mother," Ike said.
"Heh..." Soren stood up and walked to the window.
"You were my only friend. You held my hand when a bullet hit a tree as we walked home. You shared your sandwich with me. You were even kidnapped with me. And then... You disappeared. You never even said goodbye," Soren said.
Ike came closer.
"I don't remember anything from that time, but I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you," Ike said.
"....you were a child. You couldn't do anything. But it still hurt. I held onto that pain for years. The thought that everything in my life could be taken away....it seemed pointless to try again."
"I didn't remember," Ike said.
Soren went to the shelf and plucked up a book. But even as he tried to mask his discomfort,
his hands trembled. He clutched tighter to the book he held. "That was the worst part. Knowing that the moments which were so important to me were meaningless to you. That you didn't even remember them at all..."
Ike pulled out the picture, and held it to Soren. "I don't think it was meaningless. This says otherwise."
Two little boys playing pirates. Soren beamed at the camera. He'd never seen Soren smile like that, but he'd find a way to regain that smile. Even if he had to take another bullet to do so.
"Titania says something happened. I went into therapy. She says before then, there were night terrors."
"How long have you been in love with me?" Ike said.
Soren stared outside at the passing cars through the window as if he hadn't heard. Finally in a small voice, he replied. "Since we were children. I think from the very first moment you handed me your sandwich in the gardens."
Ike ran his fingers through his hair. He didn't even remember most of his childhood. He didn't remember a lot of things, but that empty part of his memory had never bothered him until now. He'd just lived on, not realizing who he might have left behind. But he'd seen flashes then, of a boy who looked a lot like a younger Soren holding tight to his hand.
"I've only just started to find out a lot of what happened then," Ike said.
"I know," Soren said. He swallowed nervously, and held onto the book as if he might keel over. "I know..."
"You all right? You aren't drunk again, are you?"
At this rate, Ike thought Soren might get drunk on the fumes of alcohol. With someone as lightweight as him, anything was possible.
"No. I'm fine. But I have studying to do, so--"
"Don't go," Ike said. He reached out for Soren's arm, and kept his grip gentle to not bruise his skin. "Don't keep running away from me."
"Ike..."
"Listen for a second, okay? I suck at word stuff. I'm too blunt and rarely notice things, but I want to say something."
Soren sighed. He looked more sad than irritated. "Fine. Have your say."
"I'm not for hookups at all. I've never really dated anyone. The closest I got was way back when, something with playing house with an old friend. I don't even remember it. It's just this family joke about future marriages and stuff," Ike said.
"Playing pirates...." Soren said.
"What?" Ike asked.
"First mate will never leave the captain...The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything...You wore that captain's hat all summer long. You were going to be my knight, just like your father was to mine. No, even more. Seeing you was the only thing I looked forward to after that first kidnap attempt. Everything could be snatched away, but you always said you'd stay. You shared your food with me, and stayed with me every night when the nightmares got too bad."
"So wait...my first love was....you?"
Soren nodded. The look in his eyes was nearing softness, he half-smiled, but it seemed so incredibly sad. "Yes, Ike."
"Anyways....this is what I meant to say earlier. Hi, my name is Ike, and I don't really know you yet, but I want to," he said.
Soren closed his eyes. He looked peaceful, for once. Before even thinking, Ike reached to touch his cheek. Soren stirred from whatever memories saying that had dug up.
"Hello, Ike. Or I should say, hello again," Soren said.
"This time, I promise I won't forget. No matter what happens. And I'll keep you safe."
Ike swore to himself that he'd bring back that happy smile he'd seen in those pictures, that he'd find a way back.
Soren set the book down. He couldn't speak, but Ike pulled him into his arms. He wasn't letting go anytime soon.
Two months later.
Ranulf joked that Soren had so many things there, he might as well move in. Hoodies that spelled out Genius with elements from the periodic table, a toothbrush, an extra bag to tote his books.
Tonight, just as many other nights, Soren was curled up with Ike. The pirate hat dipped down as Ike poured over the book. He absently fixed it, but didn't look up. He'd lost weeks to his hospital visit, and exams were even closer. Soren's notes were keeping him afloat, but just barely. Soren was reading some boring giant book right beside him. Ike stretched, and rubbed his neck.
He wasn't quite in the point where he could play ball again, but at least he was on a lower dose of medication now. Ike leaned his knee to Soren's, and rested his palm across Soren's arm. He looked up, eyes half shuttered with sleepiness. Exam season had taken its toll on even the smartest college students.
"Is it hurting you? I'll hold it, if you need," Ike said.
"I can hold my own books, Ike," Soren said.
"But I want to hold your books," Ike said.
"Okay," Soren said softly.
"So this is how you spend your afternoons? And here I thought being in a relationship would make the place dull. Though I started the hats and studying trend," Ranulf said. He pointed to the flaps that hung down near his cheeks. His hat couldn't seem to decide if it wanted to be a headband, one of those winter hats with fluffy strips to keep the cold out. It settled at not working as either.
"Soren wanted a study session," Ike said.
"And you?"
"Isn't it obvious? I'm sitting here wearing a pirate hat," Ike said.
Series: FE9/10
Character/Pairing: Ike/Soren, Ranulf/Kyza/Lyre, ensemble, Elincia, Skrimir/Ilyana(/Mia)
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 9930
Summary: College AU. On the first party of the semester, Ike is kissed by an anti-social Science major. The rest, as you would say, is history. Ike/Soren.
Author's note:
longfic_bingo: high school/college.Janet's birthday comes right around the time Philomela escaped from the helljob. I intended to actually put it out around that time, but I fell down with an infection and it didn't come up until now...when Janet and Philomela are both having bad weeks. Also, I revised a lot of the earlier chapters.
Thanks to everyone who cheered me on and put up with slow updates.
Oh, and I never mentioned that the title comes from the Tori Amos song, did I? Whoops.
Before you judge my choices, I was drunk at almost every stage of writing this, including the editing. Actually, that probably doesn't help. I'm the most boring drunk ever. I once got drunk and then spent the entirety of the night organizing my pdf folder.
The worst alcohol-related choice I made while writing this was mixing Grape Koolaid with Coconut rum. I finished it, but top ten regrets right there.
The other 30% of writing was 4AM bad NaNoWriMo choices.
Wind betaed it, and now qualifies for sainthood for making sense of some of the latter parts.
Actually this has just been sitting in gdocs since about Thanksgiving,. The PSU on the PC blew.
*
Patience was not Ike's strong suit. Two days on, and it'd taken quite a bit to give Soren that space to think. Ike had checked the cards, but there wasn't exactly one for My roommate messed up, sorry about that. I didn't think he'd take it that far, or I would've shut it down immediately.
The thought of showing up with flowers seemed preposterous. He grimaced, barely able to imagine the cliché scene, like the kinds he'd seen in many movies. The rain-soaked man at the doorway, with an apology that kind of sounded like a pop song.
But leaving his hands empty felt strange. He couldn't quite define what Soren was to him, so that made an apology all the harder. He danced the edge between almost friend and almost something else, something Ike couldn't quite tell.
What would Soren prefer? In the end, Ike could barely list anything but what Soren didn't like. Books were a possibility, though he couldn't exactly buy a bouquet of them.
Or could he? Ike filed that thought away for later.
He checked the price of the textbooks, and the books he might read, and instantly scratched any idea of books. Even then, he couldn't even tell what books to get Soren, only that he probably didn't want Swept Away In My Knight's Arms by Goldoan publishing.
Ike headed towards the bus stop. His bomber jacket was pulled tight against his throat. Just three years ago, this coat had been passed down from his father to grow into. The leather scent still left Ike filled with bittersweet memories. As much as he tried to memorize the plains of his father's craggy face, he found himself forgetting little things. For months, he'd listened over and over to the answering machine his father had made, until Titania made a new one. As if he could keep his father alive, one leave a message after the beep at a time.
It'd been several months since he returned to the old farmhouse, yet it still held the old pang of nostalgia and bitter memories. The wallpaper of yellow flowers had faded with time. Pictures of Greil, Mist and him were hung on every wall. As he went on, more of his father's associates came into the pictures, though the one's with Shinon always were filled with him making a rude gesture towards the camera.
Every time he came back, it felt like everything come back to him. As if father would just be in the other room, going through his files. Titania sat at the kitchen table. A rope of braided thick red hair fell down her back. She laid her palm across the gingham blue tablecloth, just beside her tea. As she caught sight of him, Titania smiled. Ike noticed new lines at the corner of her lips.
"It's been a while, Ike," she said. She stood up and reached for him. Her hugs were always so tight, they felt like a headlock.
Titania smiled wryly. "I didn't expect to see you back so soon. You missed Oscar's cooking that much?" Titania said.
"A little, but that's not why I came. Do you have any tips on apologies, when you're apologizing to a friend?"
"Is this about Shinon? Generally the idea with him is simply to pay for whatever he broke, and explain that he's a hateful drunken mess of an asshole, and it isn't personal."
"No, though I'll file that away for later," Ike said.
He explained the situation. Titania folded her hands on the table as he spoke in quick, terse sentences all that had taken place. The ill-fated game, the aftermath, and how he'd lost the trust of someone who he'd barely even had a chance to meet, or befriend.
He left out the kiss; that would just complicate things.
Titania lifted up her cup for a sip. The seconds spanned on.
"I think you already know the answer, Ike. It sounds like you're asking permission for something you've already decided."
His father was always the one who taught him the hard lessons. He remembered swinging his fencing foil, thinking that one day, he'd reach his father's level. He hadn't swung a sword since the coffin was laid into the ground. Greil had missed his graduation, his full scholarship to college, so many birthdays, and now this new part of his life.
It was a new ache to match the old that he couldn't tell his father. He'd never be able to show his diploma, tell each time he made a touchdown, or show him Soren. Sometimes Ike felt like he was getting better, but the moments crept up on him, until he felt like an outsider in all the parties and joy around him.
And as much as Titania had been a part of his life, she could never completely fill the hole which was left. Ike lived, but with a limp, with an old war wound across his life.
"Yeah, I know. Thanks, Titania."
He rose, and left the house and its many memories. Lights unfolded as he got closer, back to the edge of Gallia. Ike was close to dozing, when the sudden stop made him jerk awake.
Gallia, again.
*
After the knock, there was such a long period of silence that he almost left. But the door opened a crack, and he didn't slam the door in Ike's face, so it was a start. He clasped the book with the knights tight against his chest, like a shield.
Ike cleared his throat. "I should've spoken up, I'm sorry. I didn't know they meant to put you on the spot like that," Ike said.
Soren was silent for several moments. Finally, he sighed. "You did. Eventually."
"I should've done it earlier," Ike said.
"I suppose it took an awkward turn for you as well," Soren said.
For a stranger, he knew Ike far better than Ike knew him. Ike stood at the door, at the halfway mark between coming into Soren's life and remaining outside with nothing but the confusion and the memories of that night.
Soren cleared his throat. "Did my notes help?"
"What? Oh, those. They're good. I actually felt like I understood the material better. Thanks."
"Good," Soren said.
Soren stepped back, but left the door open. Ike took it as an unsaid greeting, and let himself in.
It was clear which side was Soren's, and which was Mia's. Soren's had bookcases built into every wall, and even under his bed, while Mia's had swords mounted on the wall, and not just practice foils. It couldn't be more divided if there was some sitcom's tape between the room.
A closer look showed them with titles like The Anatomy Of A Cell and A History of Daein.
Mia's side had an orange bean bag chair covered with the logo of her favorite team, the Pegasus Knights, while Soren had a reading chair which had to be antique. Ike didn't know one period from another, but it didn't look like the sort of thing somebody picked up at the local Goodwill, or off the side of the curb. He ran his hand across the top, only to find it red velvet with an edging of gold.
It looked almost like a throne.
"It was a gift," Soren said tersely.
Ike looked back.
"I'm not sure what you're looking for in a social call. I'm no good with people, surely you've noticed this by now."
"We had a pretty good talk before," Ike said.
"That..." Soren clutched the book closer to himself. "That won't happen again. I won't allow myself such foolishness."
"If you're holding back, then don't. You never know when people won't be a part of your life anymore."
It was only after he said the words, that he realized his blunder. It sounded like a threat, like some kind of emotional blackmail, something he would never do. Soren looked pale, as if he might drop the book he clutched so tightly.
"I didn't mean it like that. My father died. I still think about the trips we always talked about and never got to," Ike said. It came out more gruff than he intended.
"Mine too. We weren't close," Soren said. "The opposite. I wasn't the type of son he wanted."
Ike turned at this unexpected revelation. Soren looked so small, so fragile. All he wanted was to wrap Soren up in his arms, until all this disappeared. So, he did. With Ike, there was no in-between, just the thought and the action. Soren tensed against him, the book was brittle, with pointed edges that dug into his chest. But Ike didn't let go.
The contact felt so right. Soren fit just underneath his head, snug and safe. Wrapped in Ike's arms, Soren slowly started to unclench his body.
"Anybody who rejected you is an idiot," Ike said.
He stroked Soren's hair.
"I'm sorry. I can't even comfort someone properly," Soren said. He stiffly pulled away. Ike expected him to bolt, but he simply stepped back. When he looked up at Ike, he was unreadable. Was it confusion, hurt, or happiness? Ike couldn't tell, as Soren's entire being seemed to shift between each emotion.
"You take that book around a lot," Ike said.
"It was a―birthday present," Soren said.
Soren clutched it to his chest, almost in a tender gesture. His dark hair fell over his shoulders as he looked down.
"You should--"
Ike's phone buzzed, interrupting him. Soren fell silent.
"They can wait," Ike said.
Three more texts came.
"I better check; it might be an emergency," Ike said.
Three texts from Ranulf. Coach Largo called an emergency training session!! Apparently, the scouts came back and the Wyverns are really tough! If you don't come soon you'll never hear the end of it! That guy bench-pressed tigers! Don't make him mad!
"Go on. I wouldn't hold you up."
Ike couldn't think of a way to fill this, so he simply nodded. He wasn't any less confused by Soren, but at least they'd mended things slightly.
*
Largo's training sessions were always punctuated by those blaring Youtube videos made from clips of movies and motivational speakers. Sometimes, he'd look at Largo and wish he'd gotten a chance to meet Ike's father. They would've had old war tales to share, Ike was sure of that. But that was just another thing that would never happen.
Largo always kept his 'troops' as he called them, until dusk had fallen.
Ike returned with aching muscles. It'd been good to work out the confusion, the feeling of something like a forgotten word on the tip of his tongue. Except the word was Soren.
After a few aspirin and a hot shower, Ike headed to the kitchen. The fridge wasn't just rusty, but Rusty now. Mia had apparently named it after they'd gone on when Soren had stormed out. It even had a name tag. Ike hadn't exactly been there, because after Soren went he just didn't feel like hanging around and watching everyone else party and turned in. He'd always been a heavy sleeper who could conk out despite whatever party was happening. It was probably the only way he could remain friends with Ranulf.
He was about to drink straight out of the milk carton when he had a moment or something. He reached up on top of Rusty and got a red cup plastic cup, poured the milk into the cup, instead of the usual drinking from the carton thing.
"I saw that," Ranulf said. He shook his head, then paused to cringe a bit. "At this rate you'll be domesticated, you are one step away from being a house cat."
"Domesticated?" Ike said. Especially after the Never Have I Ever incident. Ike hardly paid attention to the 'bro code' or whatever the college guys were into these days. For all his talk of being a 'wingman' or 'pilot' Ranulf had certainly done him no favors that night.
"Yeah, you've got domesticated written all over you. You know, I'm going to get started on my best man's toast. Today, even and all this is totally going down on it," Ranulf said.
"That's a bit early. "It's not even February yet," Ike said.
"You say that, but it's almost prime wedding season. I've got to get in my order early, before the rush comes in," Ranulf said.
Ike just shook his head and downed his milk. From a cup, no less, as opposed to the usual dorm habit of simply drinking straight from the carton. Something was happening here. It had come around the time Soren had appeared, but Ike couldn't tell if it was connected or not.
Ranulf had been training Ike bit by bit for the Flip cup and Beer Pong championship. This involved a lot of trash-talking, beer drinking, and kegstand lessons from the champ, Skrimir.
What didn't happen was a lot of flipping of cups, or throwing of ping-pong balls, but that was really extraneous. Anybody could flip cups or toss a ball. So Ranulf trained by drinking a lot of beer and talking trash. Like most parties, Ike was just there because it happened in his apartment.
According to Ranulf, Skrimir had superhuman beer drinking abilities, and resisted getting smashed like some kind of metaphor or other. There was a reason he wasn't taking Modern Tongue 101, and his metaphor fail was right there near the top.
The way Skrimir arrived, no one ever missed him. In fact, the best description would be like a giant furry lion version of the Kool-Aid guy, except he occasionally used doors.
"I have arrived!" Skrimir bellowed. He hefted a large keg, and when he placed it by the couch, Ike saw that it was an older keg which the top had been sawed off of, and it was filled to the brim with fried chicken.
"Beer battered wings. Nice," Ranulf said.
"That is not all, for I have brought another keg for practicing for the beer pong championship!"
He was out the door in a flash, and in a second he was back with a keg and a tiny girl on it, behind him was Mia who was rolling in another keg. There were seven kegs of fried chicken and ribs in all. Ike made a mental note to go to whatever parties Skrimir threw. They were more his style than what Ranulf got up to.
"The little science major eats everything," Skrimir said with pride. "I met her in an eating contest, where she soundly thrashed me!"
"So....hungry," she said, and nearly fell into the couch.
"Here, little science major. Eat some wings."
"Foood," she said, her voice going breathy with desire. She fell face first into the bucket, and just as Ike was going to help her out, he realized she had already eaten a fourth of the bucket. Ike had never seen anyone dig into chicken wings like that. He couldn't help but think there should be awards for that kind of thing. Maybe her minor was in eating?
"That is some snarfing power," Ike said.
"I bet she likes to eat otherthings," Ranulf said with a wink.
"Like burgers?" Ike said.
"...Yes, Ike. I'm sure she likes burgers," Ranulf said, shaking his head.
For a moment she came up for air from devouring pieces of fried chicken. "Burgers are...delicious. So are hot dogs, especially with relish and mustard, oh and pizza is good too, and milkshakes--"
Ike nodded in approval. "Pizza's pretty good, especially the meat lover's kind."
Both Ilyana and Skrimir's eyes lit up. "Meat lover's pizza...." Ilyana said breathily. "Are we ordering some?"
"Only the best! I can buy ten of them at once and eat them for lunch!" Skrimir said. "Now she can eat twenty."
Ilyana had barbecue special sauce smeared all over her face, and Skrimir just grinned a huge, toothy grin.
"Right now we're working on getting her a gym membership, so she can go pump iron with us," Mia said.
Ike looked skeptically at her. Ilyana looked like if she held onto a balloon big enough, she'd float away. "Can she even lift up the bar?" Ike said.
"Surprisingly, she can lift up a lot when she isn't fainting. Skrimir keeps snapchatting her lifting instead of helping spot her. But that's just the start. We're gonna make her buff and strong! Or at least able to get up the stairs without help," Mia said.
Ilyana lifted her hand up for a sauce covered triple brofist with both Skrimir and Mia.
"Wow, you guys are getting along famously," Ranulf said. "Pretty good of me to introduce you, huh?"
"Yes, yes, you have the sense between us," Skrimir said.
Ranulf grinned. "We've been friends for ages. He always got in trouble, and I was the skinny but handsome cat chasing after him going 'Skrimir, no!'"
"At least once or twice, he stopped me from doing anything rash," Skrimir said. He nodded to the memory.
"Probably why the place is still standing," Ranulf said.
Ike sat on the floor across from the trio, because Skrimir practically took up the whole couch, and Ilyana fit because she was tiny, and Mia was sitting on the armrest. He had his very own keg of chicken and ribs.
"So, how has Soren been?" Ike said.
"Ooh, this is the part where I get pumped for information! I've never had to be the go-to roommate before, especially for a guy. This is pretty interesting," Mia said.
Ike frowned. "It's not like that."
Ranulf laughed. "Admit it, Ike. It's totally like that."
"Mmmm-hmmm," Mia said.
"This isn't a hook-up, or whatever you call them. It's just there's something I should know, but don't. Does that make any sense?" Ike said.
"It's called liking someone, Ike. It's not a big mystery. Actually, it is, but that's beside the point. Hey, Ilyana, lay some science on me."
"Biological...imperative... Hormones... Organelles..Meiosis...H-haploid and Diploid...p-periodic table...ah...I'm so hungry...."
"Quick, her sugar's crashing! She needs more food, stat!" Mia said.
Ilyana leaned against Mia. She let out a pitiful moan, and Mia reached into the pouch at her side and procured a bag of cheez doodles.
"I don't know how she even manages up those steps to the sci major land, they're pretty hardcore," Ranulf said.
"Well, she doesn't. I was carrying her up scienceland on my back, but now Skrimir helps. And then we have to do her homework for her, sometimes, when she hasn't eaten in long enough, which I think is about zero-point five seconds. Which gets interesting as we're both sports scholarship students, and Skrimir is always doing his homework after three kegs. I think the last paper we did was about how rainbows taste salty, and then we submitted a cat macro about stars. We got a C+ for originality."
Ike didn't even begin how to explain it to himself, let alone other people. So he didn't. Instead he went back to lunch, and actually managed to get a few bites in before Ilyana gave him the puppy eyes and stole his entire keg.
After that, he went out to the fields. Coach Largo nodded at his dedication, before he went back to telling the art teacher about how he'd bench pressed those tigers once.
*
Everyone was a little off with the upcoming exam season. Only Ranulf would stay cheerful, as he mysteriously passed every one of his tests after never studying and partying all night, even the day before finals. Ranulf was made of miracles, or possibly under the table deals from the Gallian royalty. No one could tell.
Coach Largo didn't let them have breaks, even if it was snowing, sleeting, off-season, or The cheerleaders used to practice at the same time, but they were moved after several guys on the team but him were having bouts of distraction. Ike had never seen the issue; they were just frilly skirts. It didn't stop random people from staying in the bleachers. For some reason, a lot of random girls used that time to brush their hair, apply lipstick and talk about stuff, and wave to him. Ike figured there were tons of better places to brush their hair, especially in this weather.
For some reason, this always made the girls scream and giggle. He never really saw the joke in waving back when someone waved to you. Ike just brushed it off as one of the mysteries of life.
He looked forward to practice all day, with Coach Largo yelling about how back in his day, he could lift two of the Tigers players one in each arm. Eventually it'd just fade to this angry background noise, like Skrimir was bellowing at the game and smashing beer cans to his head, and he could just lose himself in running laps, or going through the training stuff. Mia, and Ilyana were working their way through a bag of Cheetos.
The person he didn't expect to see was Soren, who had a textbook spread across his lap.
"Hey, Mia. How exactly did you and Soren become roommates again? Was there some backroom deal?" Ranulf said.
"Soren thinks his family back in Daein heard about my sword skills, and was trying to pair him up with a great swordsman. I'm flattered, but I'm not exactly his type," Mia said.
"Too cheery," Ilyana said.
"That too. Needless to say, we aren't getting married anytime soon." Mia said.
Daein? That'd explain the trace of an accent Ike couldn't quite place. Several of the crowd glanced over to Soren, looking for his res
"Be nice. We just went through this," Ike said.
"Roasting is a sign of friendship, Ike. Look it up, it's in the dictionary and everything,"
"No dictionary says that," Soren said.
"Urban Dictionary does," Ranulf said.
He held up his arms in a cheer. Mia joined him, because she'd join in on anybody's happiness. Whether it was dancing when Skrimir did the I passed another class victory dance, or Skrimir's My chicken nuggets came, now let us devour them dance.
Soren's phone buzzed. He frowned at the screen. "I have to take this."
Soren left his bag, and even the book he'd always seen clutching.
*
The meeting mostly consisted of Largo flexing and pointing at a bunch of the highlights of his old career before he got that injury. But by the time it was done, Soren still hadn't showed.
"Soren's been gone a really long time," Ike said.
"Maybe he had to take a giant dump or something. He eats like nothing but shredded wheat. He's like rooming with an old guy. That's actually the perfect metaphor for Soren. He hates everyone, he'd probably tell kids to get off his lawn, and he'd probably willingly wear crocs," Mia said.
"Worse; I saw him wear socks with sandals. Lyre lost about three lives just from seeing them. She started a Change.org petition to burn them for the sake of humanity. She got five hundred signatures and everything," Ranulf said.
Ike ignored their comments and scanned the crowd. He had never taken much stock in the supernatural. But he had a sense of impending dread, one that reminded him of rain on stone, and the tall black armor that filled his half-forgotten nightmares.
"I'm going to go check on him," Ike said.
"Good thinking. You wouldn't want him to fall in," Ranulf called after him as Ike made his way up the bleachers for a better view. Ike shielded his face from the sun with his hands as he glanced across the rest.
It was mostly empty, save for the girls. Some dated the football players, others wanted to, and still others followed him around for some unknown reason. They were always giggling and making awkward conversation when he had to get to class or practice.
Ike took the stairs, and walked the long hall to the gates, until he was almost to the road. He caught a glimpse of dark hair in his peripheral view. Soren's back was to him, a slim phone held to his ear.
"I'm here. What do you want?"
A car passed by, and Soren's voice was drowned out. Someone climbed out of the black sedan. He wore a dark coat, with a collar that came well up past his chin, like the knight of Ike's nightmares. It was only at that flash of light, the metal of a shotgun raised that Ike realized what was happening.
"You're breaking up. I can't hear you. What?" Soren said. It was only when the gun clicked that Soren clutched tighter to his phone.
Son? Soren? Soren? came a voice over the phone.
He didn't think, only moved, tackling with all his strength. He heard a roar in his ears, and then burning, burning. In the movies, everything went in slow motion, but for Ike, everything seemed so fast. Two seconds until his breath was knocked out from him, three seconds until he tasted blood in his mouth, the explosion of pain in every single nerve of his body.
Soren said something else, but the words turned sharp inside him. He tried to blink, but nothing cleared, it got more confusing. His head felt like it was pushed underwater.
There was burning spreading from the crown of his head down. Everything was shaking, and the images blurred until they kept going together and he couldn't tell what was what. There was glass on the pavement. shimmering and shining, like sun on water.
And it wasn't just the pain, but the memory of pain that left his mind aching.
"Ike? Ike! You can't leave me again. Please, Ike!
*
Ike opened his eyes, only to close them again to get away from the bright light.
"There you are. Need more pain medication? I can...let's see here. Ah, there you go."
The nurse pushed some button and something definitely changed. The world grew softer, the pain started to fade.
"Is....he all right?"
"The man you saved? He's fine. You were a real hero," she smiled then. "Oh, but the attacker got away. I hope they catch him soon."
"Morphine?" said a familiar voice.
Ike opened his eyes again, with a little more success this time. Soren didn't just look angry, but determined, like he was willing to fight it out for a cause. Ike wanted to say something, but his mouth felt so dry so all that came out was a hoarse whisper. Neither of them noticed right off.
"Oh, no. This is a new type of painkiller. It isn't addictive at all. The clinical trials have been really promising," she said.
"And the side effects?" Said the voice, harsher this time.
"It's very recently been released for medical use. There's almost no side-effects. It's an old Heron secret which was finally released by the Heron royal family. It was even sponsored by the Duke of Persis himself."
"If this drug is faulty, you will hear from my lawyers personally."
"Um, sir, there has been no evidence--"
Soren frowned at her, seeming to notice a name tag for the first time. "You're a student? You mean to tell me they have mere students taking care of Ike?"
"It's part of my training program, I assure you that all the stitches and bandaging were done by registered nurses, I was only supposed to do the rounds and watch while a nurse with more seniority...Really, she was supposed to be here--"
"And where is your superior now?"
"She...had to take a call, she should be here shortly," the girl said apologetically.
"It's all right, Soren. Don't worry about it. Everything will be fine," Ike said.
Ike pushed himself up, and both the nurse and Soren reached for him. Soren pulled back, like he'd been burnt.
"Please don't get up yet. I know I'm still inexperienced and learning. But I'll do what I can until Sigrun returns," she said. There was a deep resolve in her eyes, through the hurt.
"You're trying, that's what matters," Ike said.
"That motivational speech doesn't account for much when it comes to someone's ability to practice medicine," Soren said coldly.
Her brown eyes widened. "I--"
"I've yet to see any credentials for--"
Ike cut him off. "That's enough. I think you need to sleep, Soren," Ike said.
His phone buzzed, and Soren looked down. He reluctantly took to a corner and began to answer whatever message he'd gotten. After several more buzzes, Soren let out a sigh and went for the door. Somehow he looked both harsher and more fragile than Ike had ever seen him. Thick dark circles curved under his eyes. Even his steps were slightly off, as if he might nod off right there between the fake plants.
"I'll be back. Don't think that I'll forget this. Should his care be mishandled..."
Ike rubbed his head. He wasn't sure what was going through Soren's head, though what was going through his was somewhere between ow and what the hell just happened?
He got a better look at her when the brightness of the room became manageable. Her green hair was in a bun pulled up from her face, and she wore white and light purple scrubs with pegasi all over them.
"There you are. Glad to see you're back with us," she said. She smiled in a way that reminded him of Mist, with a pureness and light which spoke of past sadness underneath.
"It wasn't too bad," Ike said.
"Your report begs to differ. Though he really should be sleeping after all that surgery," she said.
"I'm not nodding off anytime soon, considering that I just woke up," Ike said.
"I mean your little friend, here. He stayed all night, we couldn't even get him to leave...they were going to call security, but I pulled some strings and got him a pillow." She said.
"Don't worry, it's not personal. He hates most everyone and everything," Ike said.
"Ah, yes. Soren's always been like that. One of those...what are they called, emus?"
"I don't think he's a bird," Ike said.
Though damn if he didn't have bird bones.
"I'll remember the term eventually," she said. "Anyways, he was low on sleep and worried about you. When you're like this, you get used to being yelled at. In a way, it's part of the job. Comforting them where you can. Sometimes the stress gets to people and they break."
"Was everyone else all right?" Ike said.
"Amazingly, no one else was hit by the bullets. It was so close, you caught every single one. The shooter was lost in the crowd, and there's been no luck in catching him." She reached to look over the IV drip.
"No one thought you would make it. A hit at that range, well..." She fell silent.
Suddenly it all fell into place where he'd seen her before. There'd been a big media storm about a missing heir found.
"Aren't you the queen or something?" Ike said.
She ducked her head, her cheeks flushed pink. "Well, I suppose you could say I am the princess. I was never raised in the castle, though. My father was afraid of a media storm, a succession crisis. You know how it is," she said, with a smile.
Actually, Ike didn't, but he didn't say that.
"Aren't you busy with ruling and stuff like that?" Ike said.
"My family wasn't too happy initially...but I want to help my people and understand them so I can truly rule well when it's my time. If war breaks out again, I want to be able to lead them and be able to change their dressings at the front of battle if need be. I've gained so much patience and empathy I never would have. I've seen tragic things, but I've helped heal some wounds. And I'm honored to be able to help my people in any way I can."
"I'd vote for you," Ike said.
She laughed. "It doesn't quite work like that."
He smiled a bit, and then grimaced in pain. "I know."
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you laugh. That'd make the stitches hurt. I promise I'll be extremely unfunny next time."
A little red light flashed at the door.
"Oh, you've got another visitor. Just push that button if you need me," Elincia said.
"Hey, Ike. Did Soren storm off when he saw her?" Ranulf said.
"How'd you know?" Ike said.
"Figured. Also, Skrimir owes me ten gald You got real flesh wounds and all. Even Skrimir doesn't have that kind of manliness appeal. I bet he's going to have to fight a dragon to get back his manly cred."
Ike grimaced. "I don't care about stuff like that. Soren being okay is all that matters."
"I told him you'd say that. Now he owes me twenty gald," Ranulf said.
He pulled out his phone and showed a picture. Skrimir, Mia and Ilyana lifted their hands up in a fist, all in solidarity. Shinon--Ike had no idea why he was even there. Alcohol, probably--flipped off the camera. Heather made a very rude gesture: her tongue between a v.
Ike wouldn't have even known what it was, but Ranulf took his lack of slang personally and made him study Urban Dictionary for at least fifteen minutes a day, even if some of the results were scarring.
"Everyone's glad you're okay, but we're super bummed you'll miss the playoffs and the beer pong championship. I mean, if you took a drink, the beer would just spurt out your bullet holes. You'd win every one," Ranulf said.
"I think that only happens in cartoons," Ike said.
"Soren freaked, though. He kept calling your name and clung so tight that Mia had to pry his fingers away from your shirt when the paramedics came. He kept going 'don't leave me again, Ike.'"
"Again?"
He hadn't thought of Soren other than the intelligent, slightly strange boy who'd kissed him on a whim. But the more he found out about Soren, the more he knew that Soren didn't have whims.
"Hey, don't ask me. I think we need to get some kind of private investigator up in this. It's like some film noir epic. We've got assassins, gay love affairs, and I even saw a lady in black in the waiting room," Ranulf said.
He saw a very tall silhouette. The visitor's light flicked on. She cleared her throat.
"Speaking of which, I better get out of here. She looks like the type of lady to call a hit on someone before her morning vodka. Stay strong, Ike. You'll be healed up and back on the field before you know it," Ranulf said.
The woman stepped in without knocking. She watched Ranulf leave, and faced Ike only when they were alone.
She was clad in black, speaking of old class and old money. Ike's first thought was she has to be lost.
"You saved my son, and for that, you have my gratitude," she said. It sounded almost curt, even accusatory. Only a woman like her could make a thank you sound like a slap to the face.
She was massive, at least six feet tall, yet as he looked, he could see reflections of Soren in her. Her imposing, even haughty red eyes, her hair swept across her shoulder, that showed a different sheen in the light, the sharp angles and sharper words. Except where Soren's eyes were filled with bitterness and hurt, her’s were filled with an untold power.
"This, however, doesn't mean I've forgotten what your father did, nor what you did."
"I don't know what you're talking about. My father died years ago."
"Proof that there is some justice in this world," she said.
Ike flinched. He couldn't even respond to such harsh words.
Her gaze was steely and cold. "Listen now. Don't you break my boy's heart again. I'll claw out your heart and eat it if you even think of making him cry." she said.
Ike had no doubts that this threat was entirely serious. But when it came to Soren, he wasn't about to back down. Not to this imposing woman who had barged into his life, and not to the barrel of a gun.
"Listen, lady, we already worked that out. My friends go overboard sometimes. It got out of hand," Ike said.
"You have worked out nothing. You left without even a goodbye, and caused him untold sadness."
Ike shook his head, but it only hurt. Everything seemed very far away, with no hints of these gruesome memories.
She held out a black envelope, and tossed it onto the bed. "I cannot take anymore of your ignorance. Even if my son is determined to withstand it, I will not be so accepting. Open this only when everything seems hopeless, and not a moment earlier."
She turned and left without a goodbye.
Ike was left reeling from the conversation. His first thought was I can almost see where Soren got it.
Ike noticed something on the chair. He tilted his head, and saw that in his rage and hurry to leave, Soren had left his book. He reached out and picked up the heavy tome of a book. Something about string theory? Ike didn't even know Soren liked knitting. Something slipped out.
It was a photocopy of a picture. Two boys were grimacing at the camera. One of the boys wore a pirate hat so large that little more than his chin and nose could be seen peeking from underneath, while the other tried to adjust the hat. The other boy had a bandana tied around his little head, but he could definitely tell that it was Soren.
The book itself was really dry, not his thing at all, but he couldn't stop glancing at the picture. Even as he grimaced, he still seemed like he might burst into laughter as he fought with the hat. He couldn't imagine Soren now breaking into laughter, but if this picture was right, he once could have.
He set the envelope beside the bed. Ike didn't reach for it. As far as he could see, things were far from hopeless.
*
Soren didn't return for a while. Or at least Ike guessed, as he'd fallen in and out of sleep until he wasn't actually sure what day it was, or the time. Ike woke up one of the times and Soren was there, writing down notes and reading. Homework, maybe?
"You came back," Ike said.
He had dark circles under his eyes, and he looked even more pale and fragile than usual.
Soren closed his book. "I would've come sooner...I fell asleep. I'm leaving in a few hours," Soren said.
"Back home? Your mother came."
"I know; I met her outside," Soren said.
"Well, you've gotten to the point where you actually tell me. Progress, I guess," Ike said.
Soren inclined his head. "I suppose."
He glanced down. "This was my fault. I'm sorry."
"For what? I'd do it again and again if it meant you'd be okay," Ike said.
Soren closed his eyes. " Don't say such a thing. You could've—you could'vedied. For a moment, I thought you had...that I'd found you again, only to lose you..." His hands trembled as he closed his book. "...No. It keeps happening because of me. It won't happen again."
He got up, and put his books into his messenger bag.
"Soren, you need to sleep," Ike said.
"You're right....Goodbye, Ike." He didn't look back as he closed the door.
He hadn't even gotten a chance to give Soren back the photo. Ike pulled it out and glanced over it again.
*
If Ike had his way, he would've been out of there the minute he woke up. He didn't have much to do, except surf through the channels. Ranulf had once joked that Ike's life turned into a soap opera, and considering that this Life Of The Melodramatic Or Whatever It Was Called featured a dark haired bitter girl prone to running away, he was starting to wonder if Ranulf was right.
He turned it off a little bit after the dark haired girl decided to marry the guy's evil twin brother. At least she was brainwashed to explain it, because the guy was way better than Evil McNasty, who only wanted to steal her away for evil plots and life insurance policies.
Then it was just him and the dull throbbing ache at the top of his head and the vague beeping sounds of the hospital. He checked out the room around him, but it wasn't too interesting. There was a fern which looked fake which made Ike wonder why they'd take the trouble to put a random fake plant in there, various machines, horizontal blinds, and a whole lot of white. He bet Kyza and Lyre, fixing duo that they were, would've done something with it.
He didn't have a roommate, and Ranulf and the group weren't anywhere around. Even Soren was off somewhere--he'd have to apologize for being harsh on him earlier. Soren was probably pretty stressed, but taking it out on a nurse wouldn't help anything, especially when she was only trying to help.
But a flash of the visitor light dragged his attention away from the soap opera.
Titania's hands were filled with several packages. "Sorry for the wait, I had to secure the rest of the group before I could buy the tickets," she said.
In one was a small ziplock bag of cookies. In another, it was a bit of smoked jerky. Ike hadn't had anything nearing real food—let alone homecooked—for far too long. He went straight for the jerky.
"Mist wanted to send you some 'Magic Meatloaf' to make you feel better. I didn't have the heart to tell her it'd probably make you feel worse."
Titania handed over a card. Get Well Soon was plastered over the front in glittery letters between large yellow flowers. Inside were many signatures and well wishes.
"Mist picked out the card?"
Titania smiled. "That she did."
On the other side was a large blacked out portion.
"Shinon's?" Ike said.
Titania grimaced. "He snuck it in while I wasn't looking. Thankfully, I hadn't written mine yet and caught it."
"Let me guess: 'go fuck yourself?'" Ike said.
"Part of it. He got into details; cacti were involved. But that's neither here nor there."
A whole desert worth of cacti must have been involved, because there was a lot blacked out, almost the entire other side of the card.
"The police have been searching for the man who attacked you and Soren. There's some big reward from Soren's homeland. Despite all this, I don't know that he'll ever be found." She pursed her lips together. "Sometimes life is like that."
His mind went back to the picture, and everything that Soren's mother and Soren had hinted at. Pirate hats and smiles, and yet all he had were vague images he couldn't piece together.
"Titania, Was I ever in an accident like this before? I think I remembered some things. They don't make any sense. Like, I shouldn't remember them."
He'd never seen the Daein Keep in anywhere but documentaries. The figure bent over his mother looked like his father, clad in black armor.
It was just a half-formed dream.
Titania sat down. It took her several moments to speak.
"It was a long time ago. Greil didn't speak of it, but I know something happened. You were under the care of a therapist for a long time. After he began to work with you and Mist, there were no more night terrors. But before then, you and Mist would draw and speak of strange things, gruesome things."
Two boys playing pirates. You left without a single goodbye.
His head ached like it was splitting open. Flashes of images were just beneath the surface, but he couldn't quite grasp them.
"That's all I know."
But Ike remembered the envelope. He knew whatever his past was, it would lie in Daein.
*
When Ike finally got out of the hospital, Soren was gone. His side of the room was a series of boxes stacked high. Even the bookcases had been emptied.
"He might be transferring. I don't know, he was pretty upset. I could barely get him to talk," Mia said. She hung her head, her usual cheery demeanor disappeared.
A party in his honor had been planned, but when the release date was pushed back, it went on without him. Ranulf sent him the highlights. The flip cup championship, and the beer pong championship came next, and more debauchery. Ike shook his head. He felt faintly tired just looking at the pictures.
All he felt was relief to have missed them.
"Since you can't drink with the medication, I brought some Grapeade. It tastes so much like a wine cooler, it's like high school just punched you in the face," Ranulf said. He poured it out in a red cup, and handed it over to Ike.
Ike stared down at his cup. He remembered a first time he'd seen Soren, between cheesy bacon bread. Like dots on a map, he connected them. Onethe way he looks at me, so desperate and wary, two the way he softens around me, three that kiss.
"Something up?" Ranulf said. He lifted his eyebrows. "You're awful quiet.
"He's in love with me," Ike said.
"Yep," Ranulf said.
"Wait, you're not surprised? You already knew?" Ike said.
"Yep," Ranulf said.
"So you knew all along that he loved me, and you didn't tell me?"
"It was much more fun this way. Besides, if I told you, you'd run off and do some stupid gesture which would scare him off. Sort of like the things you did without my help, come to think of it," Ranulf said.
Ike was already up and reaching for his coat.
"...Like you're going to do now, huh," Ranulf said.
"I don't want to wake up one day and think there was so much I could've said and that chance isn't there anymore. I didn't get that chance with my mother and father. Even if I crash and burn in the process, I can live and know I tried."
Ranulf rose up from the couch, and clapped him on the back. "It's a long shot, but I like your odds."
Ike only went back for two things.
The black envelope and photo waited for him on his desk, the cheap one he'd gotten at a Big Lots closeout for on sale, because the left metal leg was damaged. He had to put a book underneath the leg to keep it from wobbling.
For the first time, her words struck true. Ike opened up the envelope. Inside were two tickets to Daein. There were no dates, and yet they seemed valid. Anytime tickets? Ike hadn't even known those were a thing. Apparently, this woman scoffed in the face of rules.
What had she been planning? She took Soren away, and then she gave Ike the means to follow after him.
Or had it been Soren's choice?
Either way, like hell was Ike going to let Soren just leave his life like that.
*
The sound of the train lulled Ike to sleep for hours. He arrived to snow and frozen earth. He should've brought a thicker coat. Ike thrust his hands into his coat pockets, and took a bus through the city. It was surrounded by a thick stone wall, with stone apartments and houses all the same shade of gray as a winter morning.
Within the envelope was also instructions, and a seal upon a letter. A note was attached to the letter, with large, swooping handwriting.
Offer this to the guards. Then you will be let in without a hassle. Even you can accomplish something as simple as this.
Through the snowy cobblestones, past the wooden gate and into the keep. The guards accepted the papers at every station. His jacket hadn't been enough. Even a tan Carhartt was little against the Daein wind.
The stone walls were covered with animal head trophies, weapons, and tapestries worn with age. As Ike walked in, he was greeted with a map and pamphlet of Daein's historical sites.
Once, they had survived on taxes and the blood of their people. Now the last of the royal family survived only by tourism.
Ike checked the library first. More often than not, that was where he'd encountered Soren before. The air inside the castle wasn't much warmer than outside. A place as old as this must've been a nightmare to install a heating system in. Ike half suspected that Ashnard hadn't even tried.
The bookcases were made of thick dark stained wood, and went up to the ceiling. It looked more like a barracks than a library, with the many weapons hung upon the walls.
Ike passed The History of Daein, volumes 1-25 and Myths and Folklore of the Continent of Tellius as he walked by. He found Soren seated at one of the large tables spread out for study, a textbook laid out before him.
"Hey," Ike said.
Soren flinched, and his pen clattered to the floor.
"Ike... What are you doing here?"
"Your mother gave me this," Ike said. He handed over the envelope. "Right after she threatened to eat my heart if I ever made you cry again."
"That's my mother for you," Soren said dryly. He set the envelope aside on the large tables.
"You shouldn't have come... You were almost killed. You took a bullet for me," Soren said. He clung to his book with a tense grip to keep from trembling.
"Of course I did, Soren. I'd do it again."
"It was just an assassination attempt. It's not worth risking your life over," Soren said.
Soren sounded far too jaded for someone his age.
"...you've been through something like that before?" Ike said.
"Your father's name was Gawain then. He served King Ashnard. I'm sure you've heard of him before?"
"The mad king Ashnard? The tyrant?"
"That's the one. He was my father," Soren said.
Soren turned away and looked out the massive windows.
"I didn't show the potential he wanted. What did he think? That I would come out some kind of monster, with scales and wings? I wouldn't be surprised, when it comes to him."
"Soren..."
"I was kidnapped at age five. Come to find out, my father did it to test my mother’s loyalty. He was always doing that, testing loyalties. Until someone turned on him and exposed his crimes. It's a theme in the Daein royal family. This was hardly the first time, nor will it be the last."
He still had a hard time reconciling the idea of a prince and Soren. The words seemed to not fit together, even slightly. A prince in sneakers and tight jeans, with a shirt that had some nerdy flippant quote about Chemistry that he didn't even begin to get. Schrodinger’s Cat walks into a bar, and doesn't.
"You're a prince? Really?"
"It's just a meaningless outdated title. Kings and queens are little more than figureheads for the senates these days."
Ike shook his head, but it only hurt. Everything seemed very far away, with no hints of these gruesome memories.
"You haven't even remarked on my father," Soren said. "Go on. Get it over with. I've heard enough from the papers. I'm used to it."
"I would never judge you on who you're related to. Besides, I already met your mother," Ike said.
"Heh..." Soren stood up and walked to the window.
"You were my only friend. You held my hand when a bullet hit a tree as we walked home. You shared your sandwich with me. You were even kidnapped with me. And then... You disappeared. You never even said goodbye," Soren said.
Ike came closer.
"I don't remember anything from that time, but I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you," Ike said.
"....you were a child. You couldn't do anything. But it still hurt. I held onto that pain for years. The thought that everything in my life could be taken away....it seemed pointless to try again."
"I didn't remember," Ike said.
Soren went to the shelf and plucked up a book. But even as he tried to mask his discomfort,
his hands trembled. He clutched tighter to the book he held. "That was the worst part. Knowing that the moments which were so important to me were meaningless to you. That you didn't even remember them at all..."
Ike pulled out the picture, and held it to Soren. "I don't think it was meaningless. This says otherwise."
Two little boys playing pirates. Soren beamed at the camera. He'd never seen Soren smile like that, but he'd find a way to regain that smile. Even if he had to take another bullet to do so.
"Titania says something happened. I went into therapy. She says before then, there were night terrors."
"How long have you been in love with me?" Ike said.
Soren stared outside at the passing cars through the window as if he hadn't heard. Finally in a small voice, he replied. "Since we were children. I think from the very first moment you handed me your sandwich in the gardens."
Ike ran his fingers through his hair. He didn't even remember most of his childhood. He didn't remember a lot of things, but that empty part of his memory had never bothered him until now. He'd just lived on, not realizing who he might have left behind. But he'd seen flashes then, of a boy who looked a lot like a younger Soren holding tight to his hand.
"I've only just started to find out a lot of what happened then," Ike said.
"I know," Soren said. He swallowed nervously, and held onto the book as if he might keel over. "I know..."
"You all right? You aren't drunk again, are you?"
At this rate, Ike thought Soren might get drunk on the fumes of alcohol. With someone as lightweight as him, anything was possible.
"No. I'm fine. But I have studying to do, so--"
"Don't go," Ike said. He reached out for Soren's arm, and kept his grip gentle to not bruise his skin. "Don't keep running away from me."
"Ike..."
"Listen for a second, okay? I suck at word stuff. I'm too blunt and rarely notice things, but I want to say something."
Soren sighed. He looked more sad than irritated. "Fine. Have your say."
"I'm not for hookups at all. I've never really dated anyone. The closest I got was way back when, something with playing house with an old friend. I don't even remember it. It's just this family joke about future marriages and stuff," Ike said.
"Playing pirates...." Soren said.
"What?" Ike asked.
"First mate will never leave the captain...The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything...You wore that captain's hat all summer long. You were going to be my knight, just like your father was to mine. No, even more. Seeing you was the only thing I looked forward to after that first kidnap attempt. Everything could be snatched away, but you always said you'd stay. You shared your food with me, and stayed with me every night when the nightmares got too bad."
"So wait...my first love was....you?"
Soren nodded. The look in his eyes was nearing softness, he half-smiled, but it seemed so incredibly sad. "Yes, Ike."
"Anyways....this is what I meant to say earlier. Hi, my name is Ike, and I don't really know you yet, but I want to," he said.
Soren closed his eyes. He looked peaceful, for once. Before even thinking, Ike reached to touch his cheek. Soren stirred from whatever memories saying that had dug up.
"Hello, Ike. Or I should say, hello again," Soren said.
"This time, I promise I won't forget. No matter what happens. And I'll keep you safe."
Ike swore to himself that he'd bring back that happy smile he'd seen in those pictures, that he'd find a way back.
Soren set the book down. He couldn't speak, but Ike pulled him into his arms. He wasn't letting go anytime soon.
Two months later.
Ranulf joked that Soren had so many things there, he might as well move in. Hoodies that spelled out Genius with elements from the periodic table, a toothbrush, an extra bag to tote his books.
Tonight, just as many other nights, Soren was curled up with Ike. The pirate hat dipped down as Ike poured over the book. He absently fixed it, but didn't look up. He'd lost weeks to his hospital visit, and exams were even closer. Soren's notes were keeping him afloat, but just barely. Soren was reading some boring giant book right beside him. Ike stretched, and rubbed his neck.
He wasn't quite in the point where he could play ball again, but at least he was on a lower dose of medication now. Ike leaned his knee to Soren's, and rested his palm across Soren's arm. He looked up, eyes half shuttered with sleepiness. Exam season had taken its toll on even the smartest college students.
"Is it hurting you? I'll hold it, if you need," Ike said.
"I can hold my own books, Ike," Soren said.
"But I want to hold your books," Ike said.
"Okay," Soren said softly.
"So this is how you spend your afternoons? And here I thought being in a relationship would make the place dull. Though I started the hats and studying trend," Ranulf said. He pointed to the flaps that hung down near his cheeks. His hat couldn't seem to decide if it wanted to be a headband, one of those winter hats with fluffy strips to keep the cold out. It settled at not working as either.
"Soren wanted a study session," Ike said.
"And you?"
"Isn't it obvious? I'm sitting here wearing a pirate hat," Ike said.
